Whats the best way to tell an abusive husband you want a divorce?

Answer 1

go to a womans shelter.....they can help you........ and you will be protected from him and someone will serve the papers to him.. Abuse is nothing to play with. It takes many years to get over it and probably longer for the man to get over it. Life is to short to stay. So try getting help to get you out of the marriage. That would be the safest way....... Good luck

Answer 2

I think if your husband is abusive and you fear that he might react aggressively at the proposal, I say you should call over some reliable friend or relative who could handle the situation. Make up your mind once and for all, because it doesn't take much pleading from a husband to change the wife's mind. So IF you're REALLY thinking about getting a divorce, you should not fall for any of his traps.

It's better to sit with your husband and tell him elaborately why the marriage would never work out for both of you, and even if he promises to change his ways, just say that you'd think about that later, and that you'd first be sending your divorce papers to him. I asked for a relative or friend coz at that time, your husband may lose his temper and may try to harm you, so the presence of an acquaintance would keep you out of harm's way.

They say that heavens shake when a husband and wife separates, so validate your idea of getting a divorce by your reasoning and mind, then go for it. Many times, husbands change after children grow a bit. So see what would be the best for both of you.

Good Luck ;-)

Answer 3

Go to a shelter (any safe place, a friend's or family member's not just "shelter"), and talk to someone about the best way to approach the subject.

You can also go to an actual shelter for battered women and have someone (lawyer) assist you in serving the abusive husband with divorce papers. It only takes one person to start a divorce. There is no reason to stay in an abusive relationship, so start the divorce on your own. YOU DO NOT HAVE TO ASK YOUR HUSBAND'S PERMISSION. It is in YOUR best interest to GET OUT of this marriage; do everything you can do to get out. You don't even have to tell him at all, screw tact, tell him by having a police officer serve him his divorce papers. The police will make him sign them.

GET OUT NOW!

Answer 4

1. Have someone serve him with the papers while he's away from the home, if you intend to stay there.. also have a protection order out against him.
2. Get yourself and any children out of the home, to somewhere safe. Same as above, but he get to stay at the home.

Trust me here, you can not safely tell an abusive husband that you're want a divorce. Not unless you don't mind being thrashed around a bit.. or worse.
Take courage.. Good luck to you!

Answer 5

Walk out of the house, go to the police station, go to a lawyer, get a hotel room, or go to a friend's house, and wait till the papers come back telling you that you're divorced. NOTE: Police is not usually part of the divorce process, but if he's abusive then he's not going to be happy about it, so the stop at the police station is for a restraining order.

Answer 6

First, meet with an attorney without the husband knowing it. Explain the situation of abuse and he/she will guide you through the process so that no further abuse can occur. Before the husband is told though, I would strongly suggest you get out of the house temporarily. Go to a friend's place, a shelter, a hotel. Just get out. Then, when the husband is told, hopefully he can be forced out of the house so you can reside there. Otherwise, settle in for the long haul with your alternate place of living for a while. Put the house arrangement in the divorce. Get a protective order against him. Get free.

Answer 7

First, make sure you find a place to be safe, second, call him let him know I want divorce. If he said why? tell him I didn't married abusive husband. I married to husband to protect me and care about me. Then third you go to court house to get paper for him to stay about 500 feet from you . then you send Divorce paper. get A best Lawyer you can get to help you. Tell the Judge that you fear your life that he will looking for you and try to do anything to you.

My mom didn't do that My mom stay with 6 different men even my real father abusive my mother and I couldn't do anything becaue I was little. and now I learned taht No way I will do that to any women and mywife and even my kids. That man my gosh I feel like I want to do that to him to see how he feels about this.

Answer 8

A abusive husband or spouse is nothing to play with. Get somewhere safe a relative preferably and then phone them. They may beg and plead for your return but a abusive spouse no matter what they say is very likely to repeat the event. A abusive spouse feels that you are beneath them and will treat you as a possesion rather than a person. Aface to face telling is not the answer.

Answer 9

Leave ASAP. Contact your local battered spouse shelter and ask to speak with a counselor... try to get some emotional support from others who have experienced it and gotten out.

Get the papers drawn now and a restraining order in place if possible. Don't tell him you want a divorce, let him read about it while you are somewhere safe and he is unable to find you. The sooner you leave the better... he isn't going to change, and it will only get progressively worse.

Answer 10

For the love of God, DO-NOT-TELL-HIM just pack your things and go away! I mean it!! Thne go to a woman's shelter and get help. A counselor and a lawyer. You must also go to the police and let them know your situation and only if you want, press charges against him. If you don't want to do it, just inform the police your situation; I'm telling you to do this because on the event of another abuse from him you can defend yourself and fight back. If the police knows your situation beforehand, chances are he won't be even able to press charges.

Trust me, right now I'm on my thrid and final year on the Police Academy and my fourth at Law School. And even when we might be in different places, some things never change.

Finally, DO NOT GO BACK TO HIM. He will probably tell you that he's gonna change and that he will never ever do it again. I have only one word for that: Bullsh*t! Once a man has abused of his wife, he has crossed a line and there's no way he'll go back.

You have to leave him! Be strong and go away. He's not gonna change.

I know you're smart because you want to leave him and believe me, that's the most important step. Now don't be afraid and go on.

Good luck!

Answer 11

What I may tell you may sound odd compare to all the other answers you've been given here, I know your scared of these type of men but yet there's a physical attraction to them that draws you toward them, and now your in over your shoes on finding a way out of this sorta relationship right ? have you thought about moving out first and getting away from him ? how about finding a safe house and allowing them to help you in this situation, once you get the ball rolling don't back away or go back on your word or you'll be the weaker sex in this battle, which is what most men want out of them filing for divorce because this makes them look good and not the bad person they really are toward you. talk to your Dad and be front about this issue with him and give him details and tell him what's going on, don't hid your feelings when doing so. get the law involved and they can place a restraining order on him too. No Dad wants their Daughters to feel traped or placed in a bad situation or bad marriage, and We are most likely there to take their side over anyone else because our daughters mean the world to us too. I hope this helps you Samantha ! if Not let me know !