I am in a sexual relationship which dates back to 2001. But recently my lover was given a new job and people were talking very much about it that why should he be given that job since he has an extra-marital relationship with me. He has therefore decided that we should no longer meet , and we rarely talk to each other. I still love this man and I can't leave without seeing him. It is now almost three months since we last had sex and he no longer comes to me. What should I do to win his love back? It hurting considering that he is so loving and have enjoyed this relationship so much so that I can't imagine the fact that I will lose him. Please help me to win him back. I miss him so much for the reason that I consider him as part of me. I am feling his absence so much and I don't think I can manage to fall in love with another man at this stage. I miss his humourous jokes and love!!!
2006-06-27 23:03:53 · 8 answers · asked by Nachanza 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Well if this man in already in a relationship. and he has choosen his current love over you. i think that you can not win something back if you never had it in the first place. He was using you and not that it suits him he has left you. for get about him. which is probably easier said than done. but time heals all wounds and i'm sure you will find someone in the future that will treat you correctly.
2006-06-27 23:10:16 · answer #1 · answered by John N 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I must say…the exciting things about having affairs is when the circumstances around it is most forbidden – here you are enjoying an extra-marital affair more grave than when the man involved is not married but has a mere girlfriend.
The whole excitement with this taboo also has made you think that without it you can’t survive or carry on with your life. You just don’t miss them you feel without him nothing will ever work – well you are wrong! All you need is a man whose is very generous with humour as he will be in bed and perhaps maybe married too and believe you will forget this man you so crave.
I am not going to judge you or tell you what is morally right or wrong but the only advice I am going to give you is that – this man does not give two flying farts about you because: 1. He is married; 2. You were never a point to consider when he got his new job and maybe too he never asked for your opinion. And 3. Having extra-marital affairs…is that all you want to do with your life?
The key thing is there are loads of men out there – and it is only when you watch the dance from different stand-points do you get to appreciate the music – you can never know if you never venture – so let down your guard, flirt if you have to and go out there and explore – believe me no-one is worth dying for, live your life and live it to the fullest.
2006-06-27 23:32:20 · answer #2 · answered by uchenna o 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why do people know about your relationship with him, especially people he works with? He used you for his own selfish reasons and strung you along until he had somewhere better to go. NEVER get involved with a married man (or woman). It's not fair to their partner and it's not fair to you. If you have confidence in yourself you will find a truly wonderful SINGLE person who will treat you properly and love you for you. Did he love you? If he did then he wouldn't have put you in such a position in the first place. Time will heal the pain you are having and you will come to realize that your relationship with him was a waste of time (except for learning that you can do better!). These words may hurt you but just thank God you can start over with someone who will be worth it. xxx
2006-06-28 00:07:27 · answer #3 · answered by Tippy St Clair 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi sorry Im unsure, do you mean he was having an affair from his wife with you?
If so you are the lowest of the low of all women, why **** on your own kind?
We get fucked around by men enough we should be sticking together. Im sorry if Im bitter but my dad cheated on my mum for a while and it broke my heart. I was 5 YEARS OLD. I sat on my dads suitcase crying my eyes out asking him not to leave - as my mum had found out and chucked him out.
Please dont carry this on, exp if he has children. Apart from the comments above, is this really the heathly relationship you need? He is obviously just using u for sex.
2006-06-27 23:10:55 · answer #4 · answered by Hannah 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yeah, some good answers, you can't "get back" what you never had.
what you had was an affair, occasional sex with someone who had his cake and was content to eat it. Of course he was loving and demonstrative, he wanted something from you...and not commitment. You need some self esteem, to discover yourself.
...and you say you "can't manage to fall in love with another man at this stage"...WTF do you really think thats something you should do? , wake up..stop believing you need to be a half of something.
2006-06-27 23:29:55 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd try to accept that he has chosen his career over you, and move on. Seriously. You don't need to be involved with a married man, surely, you are worth a man of your own. You've been selling yourself short.
From my Christian perspective I'd say try getting help in an understanding church.
2006-06-27 23:08:53 · answer #6 · answered by good tree 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't be desperate! Maybe he will understand that has commited a mistake..... On the other hand there are lots of interesting men around!!
2006-06-27 23:21:35 · answer #7 · answered by world 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
lilyjebb's answer is a smart one. you should take her advice
2006-06-27 23:21:15 · answer #8 · answered by 5ecretz 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋