Ok I live in a small town really small like 800 people. I am bi and still in the closet. Though I came out to my male cuzin 2 years ago (he is str8) and my other cuzin knows because I was after her husband one night and she kinda caught us (she is bi, but married). So the three us go to the local bar and my male cuzin went to take a leak when he said this guy was checking him out and he told the guy he has somebody he wants him to meet. The urinal guy and my cuzin come out to me and he said I want you to meet some one and my heart dropped, I turned beat red, shook the guys hand and exchanged names, but I left in such a hurry like I wasn't interested in him (but I was). The rest of the night we kept looking at each other and I still freaked out by the whole thing. Everyone in the bar knows me so I couldn't do anything or they would know I was gay or bi. Since the town is so small we would probably meet again what should I do?
2006-06-27 19:24:00 · 13 answers · asked by native_guy_2003 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
Well, small towns with conservative population - this is a problem. I know, cause I am bi,from small town. I left the town.I am advising you to do the same. Go and have sex with this guy and then leave. if you fall in love take him with you.You can't be happy if you have to hide what's inside you. But if you admit who you are everyone will laugh at you or you can even get heart about being bi. It's different in bigger cities and it's also much more easy to find a partner.
2006-06-28 00:30:04 · answer #1 · answered by Sabina_Rois 5 · 0⤊ 2⤋
It's tough being in the closet.
You've got two choices, as I see it:
1) You arrange to go out with the guy (even somewhere different), the whole town'd maybe get to know about it and you'd have to front it out
2) You stay in the closet and fantasise about what might've been. The town doesn't get to find out - but you're left frustrated.
I can't decide for you (not sure anyone here can). You should maybe ask your cousin what she reckons as between you you'll have an idea how the town'd really react and who'd be there to back you up.
Of course if you're with someone just now, I'd say stick to option 2.
Me? I'd probably go for it - especially if I liked the guy. No point in passing up on the opportunity - when the town is so small, these opportunities aint going to come round too often.
Good Luck.
2006-06-28 02:56:29 · answer #2 · answered by unclefrunk 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, it sounds to me like you are ashamed. Just because it is a small town, doesnt mean you need to remain unhappy unless you want to be! I mean, i live in a small town as well, and there are only about 20 gay people here! But im out and proud! I have no advice for you except to either, stay in the closet unhappy, or go for it, meet up with guy and start something!
2006-06-28 02:31:58 · answer #3 · answered by munkypoo1 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As a closeted bisexual I feel your pain ignore the idiot who has no idea what being bisexual is about. How far away is the nearest city from your town you might want to try to arrange a night out to the next largest city. Just to see how you hit it off first and see if it is worth it. Then if you decide you want to date this guy then the real decision needs to be made do you come out or not.
2006-06-28 06:59:54 · answer #4 · answered by ♂ Randy W. ♂ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Where is this town. You don't have to give a name, but state? Small town folk can be surprisingly accepting. But too, for obvious reasons, dangerous. But that's true anywhere. Either just be who you are, no announcements or big fan fare, just like it was always supposed to be that way. Or get out to a place where you will be confortable.
2006-06-29 18:18:08 · answer #5 · answered by GA_metroman 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I thought that's what everyone wanted these days; to profess to the whole world their sexual preferences and how important it is to be honest with their feelings. It's the in thing to do. So small town or not, if you are bi or whatever it is, lead your life the way you feel like living it and let the rest of the folks ponder their nasty thoughts the way they want to.........
2006-06-28 02:38:19 · answer #6 · answered by ? 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
1. Get over your shame -- at least to yourself. Living like that is painful, self-defeating and silly.
2. If you have to, move to a major city -- and NOT in the South, unless its Austin or Charlotte or a handful of others.
3. You liked the guy, ask your cousin his name and call him, invite him to... oh I don't know... invite him to go bowling.
Reyn
2006-06-28 11:12:26 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
ya fool! go after him! if a fish you like is going to take the bait, then you reel the damn fish in! don't bother with other people. others will find some stupid reason to hate you anyway! so don't just stand there in a puddle of fear, go for it. he wants you, you want him! it's all green lights, man! so go straight (or gayly forward if you prefer) on!
2006-06-28 02:43:48 · answer #8 · answered by gaygoddevil 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You aren't bi, you are gay. If you can't admit to your own inclinations and sexuality, I don't think asking questions to strangers on yahoo is going to help.
2006-06-28 03:19:41 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
okay you have no qualms about seducing your cousin's husband but you turn red beet when you were introduce you to a man??? Something wrong with this picture here.....
2006-06-28 08:05:21 · answer #10 · answered by sstooc2001 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋