I can't seem to get an orgasm? I am comfortable with him by all means. And he never seems to have a problem with finishing but I can't seem to get there. Anyone have any suggestions as to why? Could it be distractions? We live with his parents, sister/brother in law who have two boys. But we've gone on vacations with no distractions and I still can't seem to get to that finish line.
2006-06-27 12:10:47 · 32 answers · asked by jade11378 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
has he tried any foreplay? i have learned that foreplay is important for my wife to have a pleasurable experience.
also, distractions could definately be an issue because i am in a similar situation as you are. my wife has mentioned that she was uncomfortable with the living situation so its hard for her to "be herself" at times...i have learned that the atmosphere has to be just right for a woman.
2006-06-27 12:23:00 · answer #1 · answered by heresthedeal 2 · 22⤊ 5⤋
I go through the same thing from time to time... it's not that he is doing anything wrong, or that I am not relaxed etc.. it's like it just won't happen... The thing that has worked for me the best is to change positions regularly, and keep stimulating the clitoris, if he stops, you start and I usually do just fine in that way... or I just take care of myself after the fact or before.. he was a little upset at first thinking he wasn't doing something right.. he was..and it was hard to convince him of that ... but we have talked about it several times and now we can work together to get what we want..just give it some time and don't worry so much about it.. if you can't achieve orgasm no matter what you try, just talk to your gyno.. there are certain topical meds that can help get you on the right track. Shalom.
2006-06-27 12:18:34 · answer #2 · answered by julianna76301 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If this is a new problem, then it's likely stress. Then the longer this goes on the more it is on your mind during sex. Then it is impossible because you have placed to much pressure on yourself.
If this is an "always been there" problem, many women cannot reach orgasm through just sex alone. It even happens as you grow older.
Either way, for now maybe it is best to manually reach an orgasm during or after foreplay and before sex. Then when he orgasms, you won't feel so "blah" about it and he won't feel as if he has let you down.
Good luck, if you had them before, I am sure you will get your mo-jo back.
2006-06-27 12:17:56 · answer #3 · answered by peskygnats 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow, a very serious question. I believe reaching orgasm has 99% to do with 6inches. (The 6 inches between your head) Being able to feel comfortable, relinquishing the daily stresses of life is very difficult for some people. Ask your husband to stimulate you orally. I don't know of any woman who can't reach orgasm by recieving oral. Once you reach orgasm, you might find it easier for him to make you orgasm while making love. (Immediately after you orgasm). Good luck.
2006-06-27 12:24:54 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Most women take longer than a man to get to the finish line...Maybe try foreplay (not just a few minutes, but for a decent amount of time)
2006-06-27 12:16:30 · answer #5 · answered by MJ 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you named it right. Your uncomfortable with the living situation you can't even relax. While enjoying the most intimate details in your life. Your on guard because you feel it really isn't your home. I'm sure you never factor in all these people. With your vision of being a newly wed.
2006-06-27 12:21:32 · answer #6 · answered by GoldenGirl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say probably the distractions!!! That's a lot to handle, and maybe it follows you on vacation. Perhaps you should have a "private party of one" if you catch my drift, and find out what really gets you....then share that information with your hubby. Good luck, honey!!!
2006-06-27 12:14:42 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry if this is dirty :) Get comfortable enough to touch yourself in front of him (i would ask him first...it can be kinda hot to ask his permission after you have already begun to get intimate) my husband loves it and thats the only way i can get off. When he can see how you touch yourself it is the perfect tutorial. My husband is getting more and more involved each time and hopefully he will take over one day. Kind of like training wheels :)
2006-06-27 12:21:47 · answer #8 · answered by sadie 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The problem can be mental,physical, or due to lack of technique.
The latter would seem to be the most likely, and I would suggest some experimentation with different techniques, toys,etc.
2006-06-27 12:26:06 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Many women can't have orgasms from sex. It takes direct clitoral stimulation. If I were you, I'd practice with a vibrator and figure out what feels good for you. Every woman is wired differently.
2006-06-27 12:13:22 · answer #10 · answered by WiserAngel 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow, i have a similar situation together for 7 yrs...the begining incredible. Now I cant climax with him...only by myself.
I think the problem might be they are taking us for granted, so to say, they are very comfortable and don't go the extra route, no new stuff....the same for us .
2006-06-27 12:15:56 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋