My 20 year old son is the best man in his cousin's (21)wedding.?

Question

He wants everyone to come and have a private stripper at his apartment or go to a strip club. His girlfriend is devasted. She thinks it is degrading to women and especially to her. I'm afraid that it is a big enough issue to split them up after a 4 year relationship. What is your opinion of what my son should do?

Answer 1

If he loves and respects her and her feelings he should not get a stripper.

Answer 2

Okay I was a stripper for 5 years

I am now married with 2 children and that was a long time ago

First of all most clubs that you can hire a stripper from have policies against touching and how nude someone can be and touching is also not a good idea

Maybe she could compromise tell him to go to a strip club (way more rules)

or maybe she could be a part of choosing the stripper and what is and is not allowed

if she is really that insistent that this does not happen because it is degrading to the girls ... well the girls do the job because they want to it isn't for everyone but the money is great!!

Answer 3

I agree with the girlfriend and I think it is wonderful you are concerned about their relationship. The whole concept of traditional bachelor and bachelorette parties undermines the concept of marriage - if you really need to sow your wild oats, maybe you are not ready for marriage. My personal feelings aside, maybe a compromise of having the stripper at a public place. Many bars are not opposed to this and there is not as much room for questioning trust. Can the girls tag along to the strip club? Maybe get a male stripper and a female stripper and have the bachelor and bachelorette party at the same place. What does the bride and groom want? Is your son open to other suggestions for the party? I am assuming not if you are asking this question. At some point your boy becomes a man and must make his own decisions and pay the consequences. I personally think a co-ed, in-home lingerea show (with or without the women present modeling) would be even more appealing. Short of making some light suggestions, a third party in a relationship can make it more complicated.

Answer 4

I think your son is wrong and his girlfriend is right. It is degrading and she should be offended along with the cousin's fiance. The only reason that men go to a strip club or hire private strippers at a bachelor's party is because they aren't creative enough to do something else. Both parties should be thrown together where everyone is happy and together. And tell your son's girlfriend that just because he doesn't do it now doesn't mean he won't do it in the future.

Answer 5

I don't think your son looks at it as an insult to his girlfriend or he never would have told her about it. He is just doing what he thinks is expected of him. It can be hard to have to chose between giving your cousin what he wants for his bachelor party (hopefully this will be his only wedding so he want it to be everything he has heard about all his life) and the women he loves. If they are going to be together they will have to find a way to work through these kind of issues because they will come up again and again in life.

Answer 6

Hey, hasn't this been a tradition for guys and girls for years & years to have fun before they are tied up for life as the saying goes? This should be brought to the future wife's attention. She should have more faith and trust in their relationship than what she's showing. She need to let him get this out of his system before they are committed to each other in marriage. This may keep anything from occurring as time progress on his part if she want to look at the reality of it all.

Answer 7

If he respects his girlreidn at all he won't hire a stripper.

That's if!

Answer 8

dont hire a stripper then...it's not necessary especially if his girlfriend will be hurt by it.

Answer 9

he shouldnt hire a stripper...NO WAY