I know of 3 times already which my husband has had flings. Just read his email and found that he went to an escort service and cheated again. I have tried to work on this marriage but don't know that I can keep taking the pain. When do i call it quits? Should I continue to work on this or move on?
2006-06-27 07:13:05 · 32 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
If you've already tried to work things, it seems that he doesn't care about being married anymore. After the first time you have moved on and start over. It's a sad thing to happen, but it's time for you enjoy life and leave him for good. Take care!!!!
2006-06-27 07:18:50 · answer #1 · answered by mikecook987 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First, he cheated on you 3 times. No offense but if you are asking this question and you just caught him on cheat number 4, chances are you are not going to leave him.
Second, sounds as if your heart and your mind are saying to different things. My reaction...well I would have left him the first time he did it and taken him to the cleaners. If you do work up the nerve to leave him, go through with everything. Do not use the excuse "But I love him" Love does not cheat and does not hurt! Love him all the way to a lawyers office and love him even more in a divorce decree!
Third, now I am not going to say "Once a cheater, always a cheater" because that is simply not true in all cases. I cheated one time on my boyfriend with the man I am married to now. There were different circumstances and in the end I marred the man I loved, not the man I feared. He is obviously manipulating you in a way to make you stay. What you should do it wait till he is gone, get some girlfriends over to help you pack and get out while you are still home alone. It is much easier to leave a manipulative man over the phone and with your friends at your side than in person.
Finally, when everything is said and done, do not let him around you EVER again. He will only try new and inventive ways to make you think he is sorry when he only wants someone else to come home to after he is done with his girlfriend for the night.
2006-06-27 07:40:21 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
LEAVE HIS CHEATING A$$ NOW. He will continue to cheat with you because he knows you'll not leave him. The only way to keep a cheater in a relationship, is him KNOWING that he will lose his spouse, the FIRST TIME he cheats. Its to late to start over just leave him. If you confront him he'll probably say " I'm sorry I was drunk, or that will never happen again, I've learned my lesson," Don't believe its been 3 times, THREE!!!! Ask yourself what was his excuse the first time, second and third. Leave him take some time off, with guys and let your heart heal and find someone who respects you and loves you.
2006-06-27 07:37:26 · answer #3 · answered by Mr. Advise = ) 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Because you are in a marriage, you absolutely did what I would do if I were to find out my wife had an affair for the 1st time. But you stayed after the 2nd time, and now there is a 3rd. I would have contacted my attorney the 2nd time had paperwork drawn up, and kept a majority of our belongings because this was the 2nd time, and I would have had the 1st one well documented.
If your partner cheats on you twice, it's time to re-evaluate the situation and come to a conclusion that you are not providing what your partner needs. Don't dwell on what it is, because if your partner wanted that need met by you, your partner would have came to you after the 1st incident. If your partner did come to you with why they had the affair, and you did not try and give what they requested then that is your loss. Don't dwell on that if that is the case, simply chalk it up to a lesson learned regarding your next relationship.
In short... keeping it simple...
MOVE ON!!!!
2006-06-27 07:27:10 · answer #4 · answered by Crazy_Man_in_Minneapolis 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You probably should have tossed him after the first time and CERTAINLY after the 2nd. The fact that there is a 3rd and now a 4th can't be any surprise. So, the fact that you're still there says that you're a card carrying doormat - how many more times does he have to cheat before you become gold medal doormat winner?
Get your @ss outta there!!
2006-06-27 08:10:28 · answer #5 · answered by jerryg1212 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Girl, I would have been gone A LONG TIME AGO. It's too risky to stay in this relationship with so many STD'S out there. And really, how much can he love and respect you if he keeps doing this sort of thing. You must love him alot, but it's time to love yourself more and find someone who will be faithful to you.
2006-06-27 07:21:44 · answer #6 · answered by sparkie 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My wife cheated on me at least 4 times that I know of and we seperated. We have gotten back together and things are great for now. Of course....it's only been 2 months.
Good Luck
2006-06-27 08:40:06 · answer #7 · answered by crystal l 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you serious? ONCE is all it should take. 3, 4, 5, x is rediculous. Let him have his women. But don't you be one of them! Don't degrade your self-worth. And don't you dare LET him do it either. He obviously did not take this marriage seriously. God did not intend for us to be unhappy. Adultry is GROUNDS for DIVORCE!!! If he were my husband his butt would had hit the curb a LONG time ago.I respect myself. And I expect others to respect me. Move on.
2006-06-27 07:23:37 · answer #8 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should call it quits ...like last week!! Or at least the 2nd time the fool did his deed. I believe there are mistakes and then there are screw ups. The difference is simple a screw up is repeated wrong doing without remorse. He is a screw up. dump the asshole and get on with life.
2006-06-27 08:40:17 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Move on. He has a problem staying faithful. Time to call it quits is right now.
2006-06-27 07:26:07 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋