Which way should I do it???

Question

Ok..I'm ready to leave my abusive husband...I have gotten up enough courage to do this. I just need a path...Should I send him to jail so it is easier for me to restart my life??? Or should I just leave without saying anything...(which would be hard but can be done). Last night he hit me for the last time, I have bruises so the cops would work. Please just give me a path to run with...Thank you

Answer 1

Sounds like he deserves the punishment and this would alert other unsuspecting women, but would his anger and cruelty excalate towards you? Also, search your heart before you have him arrested, if you are not going to follow through on the charges, it is not a good idea to have him arrested and maybe a restraining order would do the trick. Although some women at the resource centers may have a biased view, they have understanding and experience. You have been through enough and do not deserve a harder time, but must explore the ramifications of each option. Try going to the police station or call a womens' resource center to talk to someone experienced about the whole process before making a decision. However, don't put off your decision too long as this could be the worst thing for you.

Answer 2

You need to get out now ASAP and do not wait any longer!!!! Leave when he is at work and go to a place where he will not know where you are at. Like a womans safe house or something like that. I would not say or even leave him a not when i leave. Make sure to take all birth certificates and every important document with you when you leave and if you have kids take everything with them too. Once you are out then call the police and go to the police station and file a report and get a court order of protection against him so he cannot come near you any more. Leave first and then go to the cops and do not go back to your husband no matter what!!!!! You may also have to call a crisis or abuse hotline and let them know what is going on too! Also call your local abuse center for women and see what they have to say or advise you to do. I wish you the best and i hope you stay safe.
Whatever you do once you are out and away from him do not ever call him or contact him again for any reason. Do not let him find you either and you may also want to change your last name to stay in hiding too!

Answer 3

My dad is still an abusive husband and father, he is now 58 years old and just recently beat my mom again. My dad has never went to jail; (my mom loves him to much, to press charges) so, as a son I'm stuck in the middle. I say Don't waste any more time, call the cops, press charges, and get counseling, I'm sure your self esteem is a little low. Look at it this way if not now, then when? Do it for your children (if any) and most important yourself. These abusive men are Equivalent to, Child molesters, rapist, and sexual predators, and need to be delt with by the police, Please leave NOW , don't even wait for "your best answer on YAHOO, , this man does not need an explanation, don't talk to this man, don't say a word to this man, just call the cops, and press charges, and seek counseling.

Answer 4

It sounds good to get him into jail, to try to settle the pain in some sort of manner. But in reality, and through the system and the length of time and money spent it's not worth your time. Holding a grudge won't help you, moving on with hatred and regret is your best bet.

Getting a police escort for EVERY object you move in and out of the house is a good idea. Get a restraining order as well.

If he stalks you or threatens you, this is where the lawsuit would come in mind. VIDEO TAPE your bruises and make sure it has a recognizable date. If you feel threatned even after it's over, do what you must.

Answer 5

Make a police report while you still have visible injuries. But the police report should be made because the events you report really happened and you are being accurate in describing them. Afterwards, begin to engineer your departure from the home and/or his presence. Help can be obtained through victim assistance programs. Others who answer this question will also have helpful suggestions I'm sure also. Don't wait until you become deceased.

Answer 6

If you can make a cleaner break by just leaving I'd do so, however, if you feel your still going to have to deal with continued attempted abuse even out on your own then begin now by filing charges against him and a restraining order to show the pattern of abuse...good luck..watch your back.

Answer 7

Putting him in jail may be justified. However, you need to know that putting him in jail is not going to release you from the prison you've felt like you have been in. Be strong. Leave. Make a new life. Love yourself enough to make a difference.

Bless you.

Answer 8

YOU NEED TO PRESS CHARGES. IT WILL BE HARD TO GET THROUGH, BUT WILL BE WORTH IT IN THE END. YOU NEED TO FOCUS ON GETTING SOME HELP, MAYBE RELOCATING IF YOU HAVE TO. YOU CAN'T DO IT ALL BY YOURSELF. THERE ARE SHELTERS OUT THERE THAT WILL HELP YOU GET YOUR LIFE BACK AND PUT YOU BACK IN SOCIETY. DON'T WORRY ABOUT HOW HE FEELS. HE WILL TRY TO GET YOU TO FEEL GUILTY ABOUT LEAVING SO YOU WILL COME BACK AND THEN IT WILL BE EVEN WORSE. DON'T LOOK BACK AND ONLY LOOK FORWARD. JUST REMEMBER THAT GOD WILL GET YOU THROUGH THIS.

Answer 9

im sorry , i know you wanted it to work out..... u need to leave now... and don't look back.... i would let the police do there job with him.... who knows if you don't he may hurt someone else too... but the main thing is to get to a safe place and forget him

Answer 10

just get theave been hell out, i got friends who havfor the e been thro simial he wont change,but he will move on to the next poor gal and batter her,yeah get him done,