I'm a very opinioned and outgoing woman. I love to listen and talk about the deeper issues and problems with life: the problem being that no everyone wants to hear my opinion and I dont realize this until I have offended someone - so I do a lot of appologizing. I've tried meditation and reading self help books / the bible, etc. I know the old "think before you speak" but sometimes, in this society of complainers you wanna slap people for making the same mistakes over and over .... and my method of slapping must be with words. I'm losing all my friends :(
2006-06-27 01:14:28 · 11 answers · asked by Samantha Marie 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
I used to work for a counselor and when she counseled people that had a " foot in mouth " problem she would have them wear a rubber band around their wrist and before speaking they were to snap the rubber band so it popped their wrist a little. That let them feel the " sting " that was in their words and they could have a few extra seconds to think about what they were gonna say.
It worked or most of them so maybe you can try it.
2006-06-27 02:03:09 · answer #1 · answered by bootsjeansnpearls 4 · 4⤊ 0⤋
01 Stop reading.
More u read more the idea comes in mind and u start thinking that others are idiots. We must know that we require only few things to know in this life not everthing.
02 Think not important.
Think that the issue is not so great that u need to discuss. Anyhow things are not going to change even if u discuss.
03 Person is more important
Think person is more important than his or ur thoughts.
04 Philosophy of life (learn it)
You are as intelligent or fool as the person u r talking to.
Explanation: If u r talking to an idiot, what ever ur knowledge is, he will always think that he is brilliant than u. And you have to really come down to his level (may be using cheap words) to talk to him.
2006-06-27 01:27:32 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have a friend who had the same problem, so..i guess i kinda understand what you're going through. Whenever you want to speak your mind, instead of being too direct or harsh, you can always be tactlful. Let them know that you're doing a good deed and help them with constructive cristism or advice. Besides that, i think you're a strong woman and don't be too upset 'bout your so-called friends. If they are really your friends, they would not have abandoned you because of those things you said. What matters is your sincerity.
2006-06-27 01:28:39 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have faced similar person in our team and batch. I think you also speak the right thing . Actually real practical truth not always acceptable to most person (becuase it breaks the heart and emotion of all who come accros you to share any view).
But main thing is the method of handling the issue and manner of speaking.
If anybody speak in harsh manner and roughly/ blantly with or without intention to insult the counterpart it is really bad and all will avoid such person even if she is right.
Try to speak gently. slowly, sweetly, with a feeling that you really care for all.
See the magic
All will queue up in your door to make you their friend.
2006-06-27 01:27:23 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know what u saying..i have been there...all u have to do is try to listen more..listen more to what people are saying..dont start speaking untill one has completed the sentence that he/she wants to say..smile and then answer...
We say something that we regret later because we dont listen to other people as much as we should...
Try to put a pinch of humour to what u saying..no body gets hurts that way..belive me it works...
And when u feel like hurting someone ur looks should be enough..words hurt more than swords..remember that
2006-06-27 01:30:13 · answer #5 · answered by gentle_cute_man 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are who you are - sometimes when you "offend" someone it is because you told them what they knew and did not want to hear. What is worse? Offending them or lying to them about how you see the situation. I only ask the opinion of the people who will give it to me straight - then its up to me to do what I need to do.
2006-06-27 01:40:50 · answer #6 · answered by a1025goodgirl 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I do the same thing. Don't apologize for who you are, apologize for what you said. It is hard to change the way you are. The way I have learned to "keep my mouth shut" is NOT to give an opinion UNLESS you are asked for one. This helps tremendously. If you wait until you are asked, then if they get mad, its not your fault. They asked for it. Being brutally honest is not a bad thing. Just learn to control when you give advice.
2006-06-27 01:34:18 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Self discipline
2006-06-27 01:18:36 · answer #8 · answered by WC 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
stuff a sock in it! or put duct tape over it. shove anything in there.
2006-06-27 02:04:22 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
bite your tongue hard just before you put your foot in it
2006-06-27 01:20:10 · answer #10 · answered by cheers 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋