we have a daughter and i still really love him.....i need somone who can give me a caring advice please
2006-06-26 21:26:32 · 28 answers · asked by zette 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
listen to your heart and do what is best for you and your daughter. life is short make the most of it now . and you won't look back with regrets later. if your family can't ace pt him , then tell them they don't haft to but you want him and choose to love him and be with him . good luck .
2006-07-09 15:36:00 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The question is: "Why do your relatives disapprove of him?" Is it the majority or is it just a select few? My experience has been that usually there's a reason when your family are all on the same page about somebody. Sometimes they see what we don't because we are "so in love". Take a few minutes to really look at your relationship with this man. Ask yourself some tough questions. What does he do? Can he help you take care of your child...is he? Is he a good father to your child? Does he work? Is he trying to better himself? Does he respect you? Did he do something to you that your family didn't like?
The ultimate decision is yours & pretty much there isn't much family or anyone can do once you've made your mind up. Don't be lead by your emotions, because many times our emotions will get us into a mess.
2006-07-10 12:35:16 · answer #2 · answered by Glo 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you really love this man, and he loves you, and you created a child...who cares what anyone else thinks. Family should always be most important, but lately from my own experiences, I have realized this is not the case. If your family cant support you and your decisions as an adult, then they arent being fair, and maybe you need a break from them. But before you go out and make a mistake, did he do something really wrong to make them feel this way? They could be right you know, and I'm not really sure if you have filled out the story. So if he has done something bad, think about that, and if this is really whats best for you.
2006-07-07 13:49:38 · answer #3 · answered by HeavenLee 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Whether or not your family approves (I mean they matter but not enough to possibly kill your relationship with your man) what matters is, is that he loves you and treats you right, and that you love and appreciate him in return. Show your family his strengths and what he's good at have them know he's not such a bad guy once you let him in your circle of trust. Let them see what a wonderful guy he truly is. For instants plan a cook out invite the whole family if he's good at football or something have him and the kids play that together you know. Or plan a night were you, him, and your daughter all go to your family's house for a game night or something like that. Get him even more involved with your families activities. Bring him into there lives more. Just remember this is your family, and that "they" are making you unhappy.
2006-07-11 04:56:55 · answer #4 · answered by MKL100 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell your relatives to go to hell. Why are you valuing their opinion more than your own? Don't let that happen. Fight to the death for what you love, if you don't, he'll feel betrayed by you and this could destroy the relationship.
Care about yourself, care about him, care about your daughter. If all that is working out then you have what you need.
It doesn't mean to not listen to caring relatives, if they are that. But in the end, if you are weak, your relatives will keep pecking away at your like vultures. Show them your strength, support and love for this man.
If you do, they will fly away and leave you in peace.
J
2006-06-27 04:34:10 · answer #5 · answered by filmjeff 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all take a step back and make a list of why your family doesn't approve of him. Be totally open to their reasons. They just might be right. You just might be wrong in staying with him. Make a list of why you want to stay and a list of why you should leave. Don't let your emotions run you brain and heart. Take all of your lists and sit in a quiet place and figure this out.
Would staying with him be healthy for your daughter? If there is any abuse- run don't walk. Don't dig your heals in if you are trying to resist your family. Do you want to be right or do you want to be happy?
Think about what your future might be with this man. Remember the past is a good indicator of the future. The bad parts become badder.
If after all your soul searching you believe you should stay. then stay
2006-06-27 04:36:42 · answer #6 · answered by clcalifornia 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Basically its your life, however you don't say if he is abusive mentally or physically and if he is either then you owe it your daughter to keep away. Its very rare for family to dislike you enough to disapprove of a good man, they are normally only on your case because they care and can see slightly more than you can.I nearly lost my family over a bloke once and guess what my mum was right!
2006-06-27 04:44:47 · answer #7 · answered by tanya h 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell all your relatives that your Monthly expense (along with your daughter is going to be say 3500 $
if there are 5 relatives objecting then divide 3500 by 5 and ask everyone to pay thier share of say 700 $ per month for your upkeep with no questions asked, if they are really concerened.
if they dont and if they cant, Then P i s s on them and get married to your Guy
2006-07-11 03:58:55 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you love your man then show some spine and stand up for him. It's your life, not your family's and you are the one who has to live with the choices you make. And what is it any business of your family anyway? They should be happy for you, not causing problems for you. It sounds like you have a very judgmental family if you ask me, maybe you shouldn't go around them that much. If your family really loved you then they would accept him as you do.
2006-07-08 15:51:00 · answer #9 · answered by lady_dragonfly_27 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Without knowing the entire story of why you want to fight for him I feel that you can not get and accurate answer. Anything said here would only be bad advice. Is he a cheater, an abuser, or is it simply that your family feels that he is beneath you? I would recommend looking at the facts and perhaps getting some counseling.
2006-07-08 21:45:05 · answer #10 · answered by gemcatme 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Girlfriend you need to stand and live your life. You can't live anybodys life but yours. You have to do what is best for you.
You need to grow a back bone and grab the balls by the hand.
If he is the man for you then go for it. Fight for him. Before some other female gets him
Let go all the stress and do something about because only you can change your situation.
Who cares what your family thinks they are not sleeping with him.
2006-07-07 17:31:56 · answer #11 · answered by Wahenie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋