best blonde joke gets 10 pointz?

Answer 1

A blonde is driving down the road and sees another blonde in a row boat in the middle of the field rowing her boat. The blonde pulls over and yells to the other blonde, "that is exactly why we blondes get made fun of!" Then she says, "If I could swim I would come out there and kick your a**!!"

Answer 2

There was this blonde that was tired of hearing all of the blonde jokes people tell. She thought it was so degrading. So , she decided,"that's it!"

She went and got a make over and got her hair colored brunette. So, she went out into the world as a new woman, no more blode jokes and being treated like she was dumb.

She was driving out in the countryside sporting her new look when she came across a shepherd with a whole flock of sheep.

She asked the shepherd, "Sir, if I guess how many sheep are in your flock, may I have one?"

There were so many he shrugged, "sure, why not."

The woman started counting for a minute, then claimed, "138!"

Then, the stunned shepherd said, "why, yes, that's correct. You may pick one."

The woman picks a sheep and says, "Thank you very much, sir. I guess I'll be on my way now."

"One thing before you go, miss",said the shepherd. "If I can guess your real hair color, may I have my dog back?"

Answer 3

A blonde and brunette and a redhead are running from the law. They find a barn that is filled with bags of potatoes. They quickly hide in the bags just as the police arrive. They police start searching the barn and poking the potatoe sacks. One officer pokes the bag that the redhead is hiding in. the redhead quickly says "hissssss" and the officer says, "Stay back, there's a snake in this one." The officer then pokes the bag with the brunette in it. The brunette quickly says "meeeoow" and the officer says, "Nothing in this one but a cat." Finally the officer pokes the bag with the blonde inside and she quickly responds, "Pooootaaatoe."

Two blondes were walking down the street when they saw a compact on the sidewalk. The first blonde picks up the compact and say, "Wow! This person looks so familiar." The second blonde takes the compact and looks inside and says, "You dumbie, it's me!"

Answer 4

1. A blonde steps into an elevator, smiles at the man already on, and says," T-G-I-F."

The man smiles and says," S-H-I-T."

The blonde smiles back and replies," T-G-I-F."

The man again smiles and says," S-H-I-T."

The blonde looks confused. She answers the man, and says, "Thank goodness its Friday."

The man smiles and replies, "Sorry honey, its Thursday."


2. A blonde was trying to sell her old car.

She was having a lot of problems selling it, because the car had almost 230,000 miles on it.

One day, she told her problem to a brunette she worked with at a salon.

The brunette told her, "There is a possibility to make the car easier to sell, but it's not legal."

"That doesn't matter," replied the blonde, "if I can only sell the car."

"Okay," said the brunette. "Here is the address of a friend of mine. He owns a car repair shop. Tell him I sent you and he will 'fix it'. Then you shouldn't have a problem anymore trying to sell your car."

The following weekend, the blonde made the trip to the mechanic.

About one month after that, the brunette asked the blonde, "Did you sell your car?"

"No," replied the blonde, "Why should I? It only has 50,000 miles on it!"

3. Two blondes walk up to a perfume counter.

The first one picks up a sample bottle, sprays it on her wrist, smells it, and says, "That's nice, don't you think, Tracy?"

Tracy says, "Yeah. What's it called, Sharon?"

Sharon says, "Viens a moi."

Tracy says, "Viens a moi? What's that mean?"

The store clerk says, "Viens a moi, ladies, is French for 'Come to me.'"

Sharon takes another sniff and says, "That doesn't smell like come to me. Does it smell like come to you?"

Answer 5

This joke MUST be told by a blonde:

Blonde says: "Hey, how do you get a blonde pregnant?"
Other person answers "I don't know."
Blonde: "And you thought *I* was stupid!"
~~~~~~~
Another favorite of mine:
A blonde woman was speeding down the road in her red convertible and was pulled over by a woman police officer, who was also a blonde.

The cop asked to see the blonde's driver's license. She dug through her purse and was getting progressively more agitated. She searched the floorboards and the cd rack. Frustrated, she sighs "What does it look like?"

The policewoman replied, "It's square and it has your picture on it."

The driver finally looked in her purse, pulled out a square mirror, looked at it and handed it to the policewoman. "Here it is," she said.

The blonde officer looked at the mirror, then handed it back saying, "Okay, you can go. I didn't realize you were a cop."

And my final joke - this is my 11 yr old blonde daughter's fave to tell.

2 blondes are laying on the grass one night, staring at the moon. One says to the other "I wonder which one is further...Florida or the Moon?"
The other blonde looks at the moon, snorts and says "Well, can you SEE Florida?"

Answer 6

Two young blonde women were playing golf at a foggy par three, and could see the flag, but not the green. Each hit their ball anyway. When they walked to the green, they discovered one ball about three feet from the cup, while the other ball somehow had gone directly in.

The blondes tried to figure out which ball belonged to who, since they were both using Titleist number threes. Unable to decide, they returned to the Club House and asked the golf pro for a ruling.

After hearing their story and congratulating them both on their superb shots under such adverse conditions the pro asked, "Okay, so who was playing the yellow ball?"

Answer 7

A blonde walks into the hairdresser with headphones on. She asks the woman working there for a haircut. The blonde sits down in the chair. The woman takes the blonde's headphones off and cuts her hair. At the end, the woman asks how she likes her hair but, to her surprise the blonde is dead! The woman picks up the headphones and listens.
She hears: “Breathe in...breathe out...breathe in...breathe out."

Answer 8

a blond a brunette and a redhead are all pregnant. The brunette says "yay! I'm having a girl because I was on top when we conc eived" The redhead says "oh good, we were hoping or a boy, and he was on top when we conceived" so the blond starts crying. Whats wrong? the other two ask. I'm having puppies!!, she wailed.

Answer 9

DADDY! HOW WAS I BORN:-

DADDY! HOW WAS I BORN?" Junior asks his dad,
His dad, who is a software engineer sighs and replies,
"Ah, my son,
I guess one day you would have to find out anyway!"
"Well, I saw your Mom and I first got together in a
chat room on
YAHOO.
Then I set up a date via e-mail with your mom
and we met at a cyber-cafe.
We sneaked into a secluded room,
where your mother agreed to a download from my
hard drive.
As soon as I was ready to upload,
we discovered that neither one of us had used a firewall,
but it was too late to hit the delete button."
"Six weeks later your mom sent me an instant message
saying that her operating system was showing signs of unauthorized
program activity from a self extracting file which had
implanted itself in her BIOS.
Then nine months later a little Pop-Up appeared and said:
'You've Got Male'!"

Answer 10

Q: there were 3 little fourth grade girls, one blonde, one brunette, and one redhead....which one had the biggest boobs??


A: the blonde because she was 18!