My husband has been pushing himself away from me and acting very mean to me lately, I feel he is pushing me to divorce him because he does not want to feel guilty and do it himself. We have been together 10 yrs and have three small children but I feel he treats other people better than the one who has been here the most for him. Please can you help me I need to know if you think a divorce is the answer. Thanks I appreciate all your answers. I am so confused and anger at the same time.
2006-06-26 14:45:28 · 17 answers · asked by danaispeace 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
If you have away out financially do it . It is not worth it . Not to stay where you feel hurt in your heart or start to feel you are not worthy. I know it is hard I feel for you. It is hard when there is a fight over who looks better when the dust settles. but, will you stay just because you want to have a better image than he. Let him have it. What goes around comes around. He will get his. Just DON'T let the kids get used in the middle. Protect them. With all your heart. They are what matters the most. Be strong let me know how you are doing.
2006-06-27 16:11:32 · answer #1 · answered by Life lover 4 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Hey sorry to hear about the trouble in the marriage. YOu guys need counciling pronto. Try to refraine from getting a divorce. Too many people are divorced these days and you shouldn't follow in these footsteps. You guys have a communication problem. Nothing is going to get done with that kinda situation. As for the cheating. Well, if your companion has time for cheating that means that they you are spending enough time together. Why do you think he is being mean to you? Ask your self some questions. Do you still look the same as you did when you got married? Are physically fit? What type of mean things is he saying to you? What is he so unhappy about? DO you guys still have sex? Do you go on dates still? Does he stay out late and doesn't tell you where he's been? Try something new. Go to the salon and get new color and highlights, go buy some new clothes. Start working out. You can use your anger towards working out. This works great, trust me. Take your frustration out at the gym. There is still hope. Don't give up. Remember communication is the key, at least you will know that you did everything you could to try and save the marriage!!!! Be strong for you and your family! Good Luck!
2006-06-26 21:59:42 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
He could be cheating. If your husband is verbally abusive to you and likes to start agruments with you, that's an excuse for him to leave to be with the other woman, if he is cheating. Stop being confused and stop getting angry, focus on the children. If he is not cheating, it could be his way of not wanting to be married any more. Let him file for a divorce. if he doesn't want to and you really think that the marriage is over, you file, but, make sure you get a good divorce attorney. If you don't have money to pay the attorney, don't worry the attorney, if he/she is good, will have your husband pay. More importantly, if you truly love your husband find out if he is willing to seek counseling, if not, do what you think is best for you and your 3 children. I hope your husband doesn't get physical with you, verbal abuse is bad enough, if he becomes physical, file domestic charges against him, get a restraining order and live happily ever after with your 3 children.
2006-06-26 21:58:35 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Only you can say if divorce is the answer. If you have not done so yet, talk to him. Let him know what you're seeing as far as his change in behavior and what you think he's doing. Ask him what he wants to happen with your marriage. Bottom line, the two of you should do what is best for each of you, and your kids (and staying together when the marriage is permanently broken, is not the answer). If he's willing to work on things (counseling perhaps?) then maybe you two can get things turned around...otherwise, you may have a decsion to make for yourself.
2006-06-26 21:49:58 · answer #4 · answered by . 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It is hard to tell what is going on in his life and in his mind. It really could be a number of things, and evidently the two of you aren't able to communicate effectively together at the moment, so you don't know what is up, which leaves you wondering and guessing.
Make arrangements to see a counselor, and go the first session alone. Explain what is going on, and that you would like help in communicating with your husband. Then sit down with him and ask him if he will go with you, so the two of you can recapture what you once had (or if you never had good communication, learn how).
If he won't go with you, keep going yourself anyway, the counselor can help you cope and work through and decide what is the best things to do.
Blessings and good luck to you.
2006-06-26 21:52:21 · answer #5 · answered by Pichi 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
With the limited information you gave, no one is in a position to tell if divorce is the answer.
You alone is the most qualified to answer that question. Why not just give him some space and as for wife, stay sweet, lovable, takecare the kids and do a little pray. I hope after that everything will come back the way you want it.
You can take control of the situation if you know his weakness(food, massage, space, etc.).
My wife knows my weakness and even I tried to make mad I could not do it, she is soooo sweet for me to get mad. :)
2006-06-26 22:01:48 · answer #6 · answered by Microbes 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Review your life, up to the point when the "meanness" and "abuse" started. Take a look at yourself; are you still the woman your husband fell in love with and married? Are there money problems your family's going through? Are you a nag? Are you giving him the attention he needs? Do you still do "fun" things together? Travel? Have you sat down and talked about this thing you are going through? Is his work OK? It's not always another woman (I'm not saying it ain't though). Ponder these things...
2006-06-26 21:56:48 · answer #7 · answered by Big Daddy 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yeah, he is definately doing that!! Trying to get you to ask for a divorce. I know because i did it.. He is trying to make you hate him so much, that eventually you will feel that you want to seperate from him.. That way it could always look as if you asked for it... Continue to try to communicate with him, but in calm tones. Try not to get angry whenever you talk to him.. Don't lower yourself to begging, because it just makes him pity you and he will want to leave that much more. Try to find a way to show him what he is missing.. That's all you can do the rest is fate.. Good Luck....
2006-06-26 21:57:11 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
well it does sound like he has someone else on the side because if it weren't he wouldn't be pushing you away from him,and if it were something else beside a woman he probably would tell you what's going on considering the fact that you'll have been together for 10 years.
2006-06-26 21:55:31 · answer #9 · answered by teddybr 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Communication is key. Talk it over with him and express your feelings. If he wants to act like a moron, let him go.
As for the children, they will come to understand that maybe their parents are better off apart and that their parents still love them.
2006-06-26 21:51:22 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋