I'm confused about my sexuality. Can you please help?

Question

Ok. I'm an 11 year old girl, and I'm at the crying point of being confused. Not even a month ago was I completely obssesedwith girls. I actually though I was beginning to be a lesbian. Which I would be ok with. But all I was thinking about was sexual urges towards girls. But now, I want the close-ness to be with a guy. And I want my relationship to be with a guy, but I still have little sexual urges to girls. I really want a boyfriend, but I want the urges to girls but also to guys. And it did occur to me I was bi, but I dunno. Is it a phase? Please don't critisize.

Answer 1

Too young go and enjoy your childhood you have a long future to consider that but not now.

Answer 2

Aw, hon, this is a really confusing time for you and you shouldn't cry or be upset about it, though I can see why you would want too. So, if I understand your questions correctly you feel attracted to girls and sexual urges toward them, but you want to be close to a guy?
Do you want to *want* to have those urges toward guys or do you all ready?
Obviously you've already faced the possibilitty your a lesbian and that's great. Bisexuality is a valid orientation and it is entirely possible that you're attracted to both girls and guys, with the majority of those feelings leaning one way or the other. You're also young and I wouldn't stress over it, but if you want to talk it out with someone feel free to message or email me at [e-mail]
Oh--and ignore any hateful 'turn away from the path of hell' comments you get, please. Don't let people bully or convince you your feelings aren't valid.

Answer 3

You are way too young to have "urges" for anyone, male or female! Do not confuse attraction with sexual urges; I think the Vicotira's secret models are pretty and enjoy looking at them, but I am positive I am not a lesbian. Maybe the closeness you want from girls is just friendshippy, your feelings are hard to sort out when you are 11, don't stress and confuse yourself. There is plenty of time to sort out your sexuality.

Answer 4

Tough question for such a young girl. Sounds as if you may in fact be bi. You are still young though. Lots of things went through my mind when I was eleven years old but quite honestly, none of them was about sex. Everyone is different though. I would say to act on what you feel today. If you feel as though you want to be with guys then do that. If you feel you want to be with girls then do that. Sooner or later you will come to a decision on whom you like THE MOST, boys or girls. If you decide that you are in fact bi, then great. You can have the best of both worlds. Good luck!

Answer 5

You don't have to make a decision or even worry about it. If you are inquisitive you can always experiment. You are not destined to make a lifelong decision at your age. Just DON"T worry about your urges. If you want to seek a boyfriend, then do it. If think you may want to sexually be with a girl, then do so, but don't lead someone on if you don't have a true interest in them or real feelings for them as a lover. That is one way you would be able to tell if you are gay or straight. Don't lead the other person on.

Answer 6

Dearheart, at your age, you shouldn't know. It is normal for little Janes and little Johns to have sexual urges for anyone or anything. What I do see, however, is a little girl with a strong sexual energy. What I'd suggest it for you to hold off on the sexual urges and find out which sex you really connect with on a deeper level. And don't worry about being bi, sweetie.... all the world is!

Good luck.

Answer 7

Maybe you are gay, maybe bi, maybe straight. You are REALLY young and have lots of growing to do before you figure it out. It might take 8 years or more even. The important thing is that you realize that whatever your preference is, you can live a happy normal life and can probably get what you want and need. Its perfectly ok to be who you are and to want whatever you do. Just like a food preference. Don't worry about it. This is 2006. Anyone who hates gay people is hateful and most people realize that.

Answer 8

might be a phase, but then again, u could also be for both. maybe there's qualities in both guys and girls that attract you, which would mean you'd be a bi. It could be that you really do like guys, but are just curious about girls, or vice versa. Either way, just give it time, see what you really want, and go with it. If you're eleven, maybe you're still deciding, but you'll realize what you like soon enough. But you should be proud that you're accepting of what you are, some people aren't like that. You go, girl!

Answer 9

Give it time. You are too young and inexperienced in life to know who you are right now. That is not a bad thing, some of the most interesting people I know are 30+ and still don't know. Sexuality can be fluid. Finding yourself is a constant journey that will change paths many times throughout a lifetime. Relax and enjoy your youth!

Answer 10

You are too young to worry about it yet. You wont have to deal with getting married or having kids or HOPEFULLY having sex for another 5-10 years. many people get confused while they are going through puberty because of the raging hormones. Just wait until you are a little older to fully decide what it is you want sexually.

Answer 11

im 12 im sure that im a lesbian because ive never ever been attracted 2 a guy only girls and i say that gays Gross me out because n my fam it is a total sin a they wouldnt approve @ ALL i ur thing might be a just a phase and u might be bi but i no that mine not a phase.

good luck and just be ur self!!
but in my opinion u sound bi
want someone to talk 2 email me. [e-mail]