Help!!! i am in big trouble!!?

Question

i am 4 months pregnant just found out it's my ex. bfs i saw him with his new gf and they look happy so i did not have guts to go up and talk to him. we are going to same school and majoring in same thing have 4 classes together at least! i love him still but have new bf of two months and am to far along for it to be his plus i never had sex with him . i am 5ft 6 and only 110 pounds so i did not believe it till i went and saw ultra sound. i feel really stressed and dont now what to do i am catholic so i dont want an abortion. i have yet to tell parent afraid they ill throw me out how long will i be able to hide this? i will be commuting to colleges my ex. bf is also and offered to car pool ?! this could get ugly and i dont want that!!

i was hoping to hide it till september

i am considering keeping it

my bf will dump me!

tried telling my ex. but he looks so happy with new gf and i dont ant to mess it up i now he will be mad

Answer 1

You have two choices: adoption or raising the baby yourself. Tell your parents, and they can set up a meeting with your ex, his parents, and your family. You can all work out a solution together. It's best to inform your ex as soon as possible, so that he (and you) can start planning financially for the pregnancy and the next eighteen years.

If you're intersted in adoption, see the first link below.

Answer 2

Not telling your ex should not even be an option - happy relationship or not! He is the father of the baby and deserves to know. And if your'e only 110 pounds I'm surprised youve hid it this long! You really need to think about whats best for the baby and waiting till the last minute to see what everyones reaction will be isn't a very good idea. You need to fill everyone in on the situation so everything can be "resolved" by the time baby comes.

Answer 3

If your ex boyfriend cared/cares about you, then he'll take responsiblity for his child. As for your new boyfriend, if he cares about you, he'll understand. You got pregnant while in another relationship, you didn't cheat on him.

The best thing you can do is be honest and be honest now and not wait until you can't hide it anymore. Stress isn't good for your unborn baby and putting it off will only cause you added stress. You need to know now rather than later how the father of the baby will handle things and how your new bf will react.

Right now, the most important thing is for you to get good prenatal care and since you don't want an abortion, you need to tell people so that you know where everyone stands and you won't have to stress over it. You can't change how people will react if you tell them now or if you tell them in two months. You can only be in control of how you handle things.

Answer 4

The best advice I can give you is what I would do if I was in you position. I would tell my ex... the two of you made the pregnancy happen and he needs to take responsibility for his actions. You were apparently a couple at one time and both of your new others will have to accept it, if they don't then oh well. You are already in college and an adult your parents will have to deal with the fact that you are going to have a baby. If they kick you out then you will have to become self supporting and raise your child. Good Luck it will all be worth it when the baby comes!!

Answer 5

Aww...calm down and take a deep breath. :)

First of all, as you know, you have two options: you can terminate the pregnancy, or carry out full-term. If you choose the latter, you will have to decide whether you're ready to become a parent at this point in your life, or whether you would consider adoption.

Although it may feel as though your world is coming to an end, it isn't. But you can't keep this inside of you. Your ex-boyfriend is entitled to know that he has fathered a child and it would be healthy to discuss your options with him. Also, you will need to tell your parents. Although you may expect them to be really upset and shocked at first (they probably will be), you are their daughter and I'm sure that your well-being, as well as your child's, would be in their best interest.

You need a strong support base during this rather life-changing event in your life. There are 24/7 hotlines available for you to speak with a counselor. However, the sooner you get the support of your loved ones, the better for you and the mind/health of your child. If you feel stressed and overwhelmed, your child will feel that too.

I truly wish you the best and know that everything will work out.

Answer 6

The only thing you can honestly do is tell everyone.
If your new boyfriend really had feelings for you he would either stay or leave for a while to think then come back.
I think its best to tell the X that its his. Everyone will most likely be hurt at first but it should past over.
It takes 2 to make a baby remember.

And your parents are not real honest religious caring loving parents if they kick you out.
I fell pregnant at 17 and the fathers parents were christian..and highly... however they let us live their for a while and have come to terms with it.
No parent would let their pregnant child roam the streets because they were hurt!

Answer 7

your ex deserves to know that he has a baby on the way. he may get mad, but i'm sure he would get over it. if he doesn't want to help you at all with the baby then he's not a good father figure anyway. and if your new bf can't accept it, then he may not really care about you. it happened before you got with him so he shouldn't get upset about it. and your parents need to know. i know that some parents kick out their kids over this stuff, but they need to know the truth. a lot of them have a grandparent instinct that kicks in and then they are always trying to help you. so you should try to tell them. and you probably won't be able to hide it very much longer at all, because most women start showing by their 5th month. just talk to everyone about it, and if things don't work out there are tons of parenthood places that will and can help you. i hope that everything works out for you and that you talk to them. good luck.

Answer 8

You first of all need to tell your parents and then your ex boyfriend. There is adoption as an option. I have an adopted child and I thank the mother in my heart every day so that I could be a mother. See your Parish Priest too. Get all the support you can. It is not the end of the world. Pray for guidance. God Bless.

Answer 9

I see that people are already advising you to give away yoru child for adoption. Adoption is NOT "getting rid of a pregnancy." It is resigning yourself to a 50% or greater chance of PTSD, unresolved greif that lasts for decades, serious depression, and secondary infertility. Once you've given birth to a child, that child is a part of you and your body and your family and "giving it away" goes against what Nature programmed your body for.

Or, if you want to look at it this way, God does not make mistakes with his Gift of creating life. He does NOT put babies into the wrong tummies! for some reason, you were meant to have this child and it will be a blessing for you and all the people involved. his current girlfriend may become a loving stepmother and your boyfriend a loving stepfather to your child.

and you have every right to all the resources you need to raise that child. check out article 25 of the Universal Declaration of Human Rights - http://www.un.org/overview/rights.html...


what people won't tell you, especially adoption agencies, is that the literature shows incrediblely huge physical, emotional and psychological damage coming from giving up a baby for adoption. This is from the Journal of Gynocological,Obstetrical, Neonatal Nursing (July/Aug 1999, p. 395):

"A grief reaction unique to the relinquishing mother was identified. Although this reaction consists of features characteristic of the normal grief reaction, these features persist and often lead to chronic, unresolved grief. CONCLUSIONS: The relinquishing mother is at risk for long-term physical, psychologic, and social repercussions. Although interventions have been proposed, little is known about their effectiveness in preventing or alleviating these repercussions."

good luck and explore keeping your baby and raising it for a couple of weeks at least before considering adoption. at least then you can make an informed decision without predadopters being in the delivery room with you waiting for you to 'give them the goods.'

Answer 10

You need to tell your ex boyfriend...no matter how happy he is or isnt...you shouldnt go through this alone...and if your new boyfriend dumps you then he obviously didnt care about you....i would just tell your parents...they shouldnt kick you out....if you keep the baby there are plenty of places willing to help you...you just have to look for them....you wont be able to hide it until september....im currently 6 months pregnant and everyone can tell.....good luck!!