the person i've known for three years is going through a rough time. his mom kicked him out of the house (he's only 15 and i am too) and the only place he has to stay is at his girlfriends house. and he really loves her you know but she keeps cheating on him and everytime she does he always goes back to coke. and i wanna help him out cause i've known him for three years and he's gonna end up making a mistake and end up killing himself eventually. but i dont know how exactly how i can help. do you have any ideas how i can
2006-06-26 09:38:34 · 19 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
If you are truly his best friend, you can help him by telling him the truth. First of all, he is fifteen. He has a parent and apparently she loves him or she wouldn't have kicked him out. When a child, yes a child, is allowed to do whatever they want without boundaries and the parent permits it, that is by no means love. Love has to be firm in spite of what feels right. You are also a child, and seemingly a little more mature because you took the initiative to ask the question on his behalf. You talk to him and let him know love is doing some things you don't necessarily like, and those things may not be convenient, but in the long term it is best. He should show his mother that he loves and respects her judgment by going home and abiding by the rules of the house, unless there is something unlawful or immoral occurring there. Then he must make the biggest effort yet, and that is to start loving himself. When he does, he will not allow other people's actions to provoke him to self destruction. Tell him young lady, just how smart, special, kind and loved he is by those that really love him.
2006-06-26 09:54:23 · answer #1 · answered by ms.sassy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think the first way a friend can help a friend on any type of substance abuse at all is to convince him to go to rehabilitation and have him learn what he is doing to himself is bad and can later have bad effects on him or possibly even kill him! Next I think once he realizes this he needs to figure out what he wants to achieve in life and If he is going to keep in high school or enroll again! I hope my advice helped you and make sure that you are very supportive of him because that will help him more than anything else!
2006-06-26 16:43:48 · answer #2 · answered by Erin I 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd suggest talking to your folks about letting him stay with your family instead of his girlfriend's place. Getting some space between them might help a bit. Also, talk to him whenever you can. Be honest. Tell him you hate seeing what she does to him, that you hate seeing what coke does to him, that you're scared he might become a danger to himself. All hard conversations to have, but much better than the alternative.
2006-07-08 07:26:21 · answer #3 · answered by Jessica C 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Someone should really talk to his mom. No one at his age deserves to be treated like that. Doesn't his mother care of what would happen if he couldn't find a place to stay?
He should dump her and stay with you instead. It a simple way to help without getting too involved in their relationship.
2006-07-09 08:57:28 · answer #4 · answered by isma 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
People can only help themselves! You can do an intervention or give him numbers to clinics. But in the end he has to help himself. However, since he is a minor his parents could have him checked into rehab. Call the police when he is using...turn him in! Better locked up then dead!
2006-07-08 23:54:04 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well if this was me. i would tell him that its not worth going back to her. and then you should try and get with him. because you have known him 4 3 yrs it should be easier to do. and then maybe he will stay off coke..i have learned through experience!!!oh yea i am 15 2
2006-07-07 14:48:06 · answer #6 · answered by a_hotgurl_4life 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to his mom and ask if she ever though about getting help for her son. Explain to her about his living condition and let her know that she's still his mom. And if she care, to call rehab so he can get out of the situation that he's in. He's too young and life is too short.
2006-06-26 16:46:19 · answer #7 · answered by pradavee 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Does he have any family (grandparents, cousins, aunts and uncles, etc.) that he could stay with? Or with one of his friends? (not his girlfriend- he needs to get out of that house)
Counseling and a stay at a good rehab center sound like a good solution, too. You need to get your parents or a trusted adult involved in this.
2006-06-26 16:44:33 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are too young to be playing Dr. Phil. Right now you need to have fun and get ready for the bright future that you are going to have. It is so sweet that you want to help and are such a friend.
But right now the adults should be helping him.
2006-07-08 22:07:12 · answer #9 · answered by Wahenie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
u need to try to get him to go to a counselor so they can help me the girlfriend cheating on him well they are so what do u expect but thereis no need forhim to kill hisself not over no girl he should try to bend things with mom is he going to school and doing good in school if no he needs to go and u should tell his mom that he has a drug problem maybe she will help 2
2006-06-26 16:44:05 · answer #10 · answered by teresa d 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋