How do you know whether to stay in the relationship when you have kids and do not believe him.
2006-06-26 08:00:24 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
That's a tuff question to answer for someone else. I know some men and women that knew of their spouse cheating on them and stayed married , for the children's sake. I would say if there is a lot of arguing and fighting. That is not good for the children and not doing them any good to stay together. As far as believing him? You must know about him contacting other SEXUAL partners he has had before, so what is not to believe? What I didn't do years ago when I was in the same situation, was try marriage consoling it may have helped. I really wish you all the best ,divorce won't be easy on you or your children.
2006-06-26 08:32:28 · answer #1 · answered by auntkarendjjb 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think the first thoughts should not be whether or not to continue with the relationship. That could be the final outcome, but the very last straw. You only suspect that he has had an affair. You are not sure. Even if he has had an affair, you still need to talk it through and perhaps give the relationship a second chance. Obviously if he habitually cheats on you, there is little to motivate you to stay with him. The first thing to do then is to believe him until you have good reason not to. Find out why he has contacted his previous partners. The contacts may have been made by them rather than your husband, for example. Do talk to your husband. Try to rediscover why you got together in the first place. I sincerely hope you sort things out. I wish you all the best.
2006-06-26 15:11:46 · answer #2 · answered by Modern Man 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well counseling is a start. If not for both then at least you to start. Contacting a previous partner does NOT mean he is having an affair. You don't mention any details as to why you suspect. I would think you need a little more evidnce not just a guess. Why not give him the benefit of the doubt till you find out otherwise? its that or there ism ore to this story then you have stated here. So I suggest you stay till you know otherwise. He has a warning now so see what happens.
2006-06-26 15:08:57 · answer #3 · answered by JoeP 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
From my experience, My intuition was right on so I listened to my gut. I hired a private Investigator and had him followed. Sure enough... I was right. - So I planned my escape....
I waited for him to go to work one morning, knowing all along I already had the moving truck scheduled to arrive moments later. I moved everything out in Three Hours (Including the pool table). I did however leave him the riding lawnmower.
Your question was how do you know whether to stay or go? Well if he is CHEATING, the TRUST has been broken. I don't know about you - I could NOT forgive this. And as far as the KIDS - Would you rather them see you stressed and worried or confident and independent? They adapt - LIVE FOR YOU
2006-06-26 15:18:03 · answer #4 · answered by PoolRoomPaintings.com 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do NOT let the kids be a reason to stay in a dead relationship. I dont know that yours is dead because you suspect something, you do not know it to be factual. I say do NOT act without true facts, it makes the difference. If he is cheating ...and or you dont trust him, I doubt you would want to raise your children in such a household so if he is running around on you...I would run to a divorce lawyer.
2006-06-26 15:09:38 · answer #5 · answered by Mean Carleen 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you really distrust him that much, then perhaps you should hire a private investigator. He can find out almost anything that your husband might be doing.
I don't think you can abandon a relationship just because you think he might be fooling around. Get some proof before making that kind of decision.
2006-06-26 15:05:53 · answer #6 · answered by PoliPino 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you have no trust and respect for each other you have no marriage.
You will be just married with no marriage because the marriage part should be built on trust and respect for your spouse.
If your staying for the kids and exposing them to a unhealthy emotional environment, I feel your not doing your kids any good.
2006-06-26 15:11:05 · answer #7 · answered by words from the heart 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get proof before you jump to conclusions. Leaving him on suspission and then finding out that there was nothing, will hurt you and him. For all you know, maybe he's just keeping in touch with the ones that he had a relationship with in the past.
2006-06-26 15:05:13 · answer #8 · answered by Halo 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Find evidence. Don't separate the children from their father and label him a cheater until you are certian. When/if you do...then leave...who needs a cheater.
2006-06-26 15:04:31 · answer #9 · answered by Rabbit Ritto 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
HE HAS CROSSED THE LINE JUST CONTACTING EXES, YOU NEED TO LAY THE LAW DOWN OR JUMP SHIP ON THIS ONE!!!
2006-06-26 15:03:55 · answer #10 · answered by tlcin2006 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋