Do you think my mom is a slob?

Question

I am a mother of 4. I work full time and go to college full time. My mother baby sits for me when the kids get out of school and full time during the summer months. After a hard days work I head to my mom's house to pick up my children. Let me tell you about my mom's house. It is dirty when I drop the kids off and even dirtier when i pick the kids up. My mom expects me to clean her house from top to bottom when I pick up the kids. I would not mind but when you look at the mess it is literally 3 weeks worth!

My 15 year old little sister also lives with my mom. My mom "never" makes her clean, not even her own room. When I lived with her I had to do "everything". I tell my mom that the kids are old enough to clean behind themselves, they are 11,9,8 and 6. She still wants me to do "everything". I told her the when granny took care of me and my brother she never let us cut up in her house like that and granny cleaned "everyday". Who's right

No she gets paid and additionally, why should she expect from me something she never did herself? Granny took care of me and my bro for years because my mom needed her help and could not afford a sitter. Granny NEVER asked for a dime. She did it because she loved us and she loved my mom. She was trying to "help" not make a profit.

I guess I should add more details since some of you still don't get it. When my children are home with me. I teach them responsiblity of being neat and clean by giving them chores and making them clean up behind themselves; however, when I am at work I have no idea what is going on until I call or get there myself. There is not much I can do from my job but threaten and chastise. I feel that when a child is with a sitter who is getting paid like my mom "does" it is their responsibility to keep the kids in line in the absence of the parent. Kids will do what they can get away with. especially in the absence of supervision. All of us REAL adults know that.

Answer 1

well let me tell you something I'm no one to criticize may be you wont change her but you can help change the habits of your kids while at her house and your sister. tell your kids if you help me by picking up after themselves. make them pick up their plates after they eat even wash them tell them you will give them a prize at the end of the week , make a chart and put some chores on them if they get them filled up with stickers they get the prize. I'm not saying they should do anything for your mom because at least your sis should do that maybe your mom can do the same with your sis but i daut it.make this a habit of yours and do it at your home to. but just make sure you don't get sloppy because them what example are you giving them. I have a 4 @ 5 year old and they have to clean up their and their messes they might kick and scream but they do it. talk to your mom tell her this kids are expected to do these simple chores that now maybe she could put her part and get the house clean , help her the first day clean the house between all of you including her then tell her its up to her to keep up with it. hey its a thought hope i helped see ya.

Answer 2

So, you're paying her to sit so the "payback for services" angle isn't legitimate.

Your mom may or may not be a slob. As you well know, 4 kids in that age category (or any age for that matter) can total a house pretty quickly. However, picking up is different from cleaning.

Tell mom that the kids need to pick up after themselves and as the caretaker, it is HER job to make that happen while she has them. You are not there, so you can't take that one on. (though you can talk to your kids about being helpful). Cleaning is another subject and pretty much her responsibility. After all, a paid daycare center expects the kids to pick up, but not to clean.

The alternative if this is going to continue to create friction is to find another sitter. Perhaps an older teen or college student at your house.

Then mom can't blame you for her mess.

Answer 3

Its your moms house, she obviously has cleaning issues...and you can't expect things to improve while your kids are there...I didn't hear any dollar figure that you were paying mom to watch the kids but child care is very expensive, I'd clean the house in payment of the child care ....its the trade off for child care...I hear your point but if you don't want to pay for child care services elsewhere...and not clean the house yourself the have your mom watch the kids and pay for a house cleaner to come and clean occasionally.

Answer 4

Pay her cash, or shut up. Find someone else and stop whining about how "mommy" doesn't do what you want.
Grow up! You made babies, suck it up. If YOU haven't taught YOUR children to clean up after themselves without supervision, then YOU have failed, not your mother. It's not the babysitter's job to make sure YOUR kids get the right teaching at home.
It is HER house, if you don't like the way she does things in HER house, then get another sitter and pay. UNTIL you are paying someone you have no right to tell them anything. And you will NEVER have the right to tell your mother what to do in her home.

Answer 5

i think she need ur attention. she show her lov in a wierd way.. well at least now u know u she can rely on when time r needed.I think there are alot of peolpe who r without parent willing to take over u if they can. and get the attention(lov) as wat ur mom give

why r u complaining abt her?.. do u like when u r old like her, ur kids will complain abt u?

Answer 6

god help that woman by sending back her brain, why u do not hire a baby sitter at your house.

Answer 7

find new sitter.