my wife give oral sex to a male stripper at friends 40th party - should I be upset?

Question

My wife give oral sex to well endownded stripper until he climaxed.
She said she was drunk and all the women had a go. She said she sorry and regrets it - but I feel insercure and betrayed and not sure I know who my wife is any longer.
Should I just put it down to experience or is it a big issue?

SHOULD I TELL ALL THE OTHER GUYS WHAT THERE PARTNERS GOT UP TO?

Answer 1

It's a big issue - and you should be upset.

Answer 2

1) It IS a big deal.

2) How did she apologize? Did she say she was sorry she did it, or did she say she is sorry the way it made you feel and how it hurt you? One is selfish, the other thinking of you - she's your WIFE, she should think about you!

3) How did she make it up to you? If all she did was say "I'm sorry", then go on with business as usual, she needs to do more than that. You deserve more than that. She damaged the relationship (that's what your feeling now, the damage that SHE caused). "I'm sorry" isn't enough. Look up the word "penance" and "recompense". She must offer/do something to repair the relationship.

4) Has she ever s?cked you off in public? When was the last time? That particular act should now ALWAYS be available to you - at the mall, in the car. "Hey, you have some work to do before you go shopping."

5) Does she work? Have her give you 3 times the money a simply AWESOME looking "escort" would cost. And, even if you were to go and have at it with the escort, this would only be "equal" - the intial damage she would still need to repair.


Don't just let this fade into the past without addressing it. Is this an example of your wife's utter selfishness? First to do it, then to lamely apologize for it? Your are 100% RIGHT to feel betrayed, and to feel angry. Expect her to respond and fix these feelings. She took the effort to suck off a stranger's c?ck until he c?me in her mouth - what effort is she giving you?

Answer 3

Yes you should be upset because she has no respect for you at all. That is a big NO NO! I "m so sick of the excuse I was drunk. If you know drunking makes you crazy then don't drink. I don't cause it messes me up.
Your wife doesn't know what kind of person he is. For gods sake he is a stripper. You don't know what diseases he has. Your wife could have brought anything to you.
She betrayed you in the plain sense of the word. She gave a dude not her husband some stranger a ******** until he cummed. It is something you can't take lightly.
If you want to try you can go through therapy but your women totally dis respected you. I don't mean to hurt your feelings but she did dude.
That was unacalled for. She didn't take your marriage vows seriously. If it was you who did that dude she would be pissed.
How can you put it down to experience that is so crazy! She is not three years old. Stop making excuses. Be a man and don't let her punk you.

Answer 4

I've gotten drunk have you ? I knew what was happening , she just didn't think you'd find out , or she told you because someone threatened to tell .You have been betrayed , wonder how many times you didn't know ?A cheater regrets getting caught and it might be sometime before it happens again .You kiss her with that mouth and that could have gave both of you medical issues ! Forgive yes , stay married no .Tell her you love her enough not to hate her but you want to find someone with morals and respect for you and herself .If it happened with a stranger ( a stripper , an employed for a night guy ) What about co workers , friends of the family, out with the girls and a cute guy has a minute ???????? Nasty is nasty and excuses aren't anything but reasons for what someone has done wrong . Hope you find a lady .

Answer 5

You know what? If she can't hold her liquor well enough to know what she's doing then she shouldn't even be drinking!
What if that guy had herpes or AIDS?
You're very confused right now. You need to get away from her for a few days to think for yourself. Maybe give her alittle scare for now until you come to a decision if you feel strong enough to forgive her. I wouldn't let her off the hook so easily.
If she told you what happened and was honest with you and really was ashamed, then at least she'll be careful for now on.

I think that all strippers (men and women) should sign a contract that they are not allowed to be touched period! Their job is to strip dance to the nude and that should be treated more like an art.

Answer 6

Should you be upset???That's a silly question. Of course you should. That is your wife that took vows and then did not uphold them. Being drunk is not an excuse. You may lose your inhibitions but the thought was already there...the alcohol just allows you to follow through.

Do not put it down as experience. It is a big issue, and YES I would tell all the other men. If you have to track down the stripper to prove it to the other men (cuz women lie...coming from a woman)

I would make her jump through hoops and EARN your trust back, otherwise the rest of your life together is going to be one of mistrust and unhappiness....if you still feel like you can't trust her, even if she tries, then all you can do is divorce. It isn't fair to you to have to live a life of insecurity because she couldn't keep her mouth to herself or to you.....

Good Luck!

Answer 7

It is something, not really a big issue, but not to be taken lightly.
But it could be worse.
This wasn't a romance or affair with feelings involved, it was a one-time thing, it was in front of others, she was drunk, she was under a kind of group pressure - not only alcohole, but also the others all having a go. It's a bit like when you go to a Tupperware party, everyone buys the sh*t, so you end up buying it, too.
Please try to forgive her. She is sorry, and she regrets it.
And he didn't give oral to her or have sex with her.
I can understand your feelings, believe me, but I think it's not reason enough to throw a marriage away. Put it down to experience and show that you have a really big, kind, forgiving heart.

Answer 8

what would her reaction be if you gave oral to a chick you met at a bar, or a stripper at a batchelor party? By the way, I have been plenty drunk in my life, but never so much that I was unaware of what I was doing. She knew what she was doing. To me, that would be unforgivable. You should just divorce her now and find someone faithful. I mean, how could you ever kiss her again knowing where that mouth had been?

Answer 9

this is still considered cheating! It makes no difference if he climaxed or not. well, it make some, it means that she new what she was doing, and didn't stop. That breaks the trust and bond you have with your spouse. This is a major issue, and if you feel that you are unable to get past this, then you should think about moving out and give each other some space and see if that helps, if not , then maybe a divorce would be in order. Sorry to hear this has happened.

Answer 10

Drop her like a bad transmission! Even if you forgive her and go through counseling, try all avenues to resolve this she is going to know in the back of her head she got away with it. Marriage is kinda like a hula-hoop, when you have a healthy one, things just flow and are in balance; but when one of the couple cheat it throws off the balance, you'll never trust her down deep again, and she'll not trust you to turn down an opportunity to cheat when it arises. There is a void of trust and that can't be replaced. Divorce her while you can and make sure the judge hears this story so you can keep your money and assets.

Answer 11

ther guys. It's none of your business. As for your wife, she was drunk, she was at a party with a bunch of women who were probably egging her on, and there was a hot, young, well-endowed male stripper in the room. What would you do if the situation were reversed? She made a mistake and she has apologized for it. She is not in love with the stripper. We all make mistakes - we are all human. I say forgive her and let it go. But if another one of those parties c