this is for older adults and seniors?

Question

id like to know from us older adults and seniors if your adult children have totally abandoned you. i have four kids, well they are not children, from 44 yrs down to 33 years, they never call, come over e mail me, no cards for birthdays, nothing on mothers day absolutely nothing. i raised these people to be good adults, what the heck do these kids think, my friend works in an old peoples home and management says about 85% have no visitors, no kids, no one. am i alone? its killing me, i have 9 grandchildren which i have not seen in years. i am 65 years old, do you think any of them will miss me when im gone? i dont think so, us adults miss out departed children { adults } and really never get over it........thanks for any answers...........k

Answer 1

K....maybe in your life with your kids you gave them too much; spoiled them. I am a retired nurse and I can tell you that your friend is right about nursing homes. HOWEVER, there is usually a reason for the abandonment. Maybe nice old grandpa was a real bas-tard when his kids were growing up; maybe sweet old granny beat the tar out of her kids all of the time. Now they are old and expect everyone to come see them; they forgot how they treated their families in years past. I have seen families devoted to their invalid parents also because they were so close. If you are being ignored by your grown children, there IS a reason. Maybe you should ask them why. Something is wrong, bigtime.....I know you're lonely, but you know, there are two sides to every story. I'd advise you to get involved in your own life without the kids/grandkids and go about your business. Get some counseling for yourself to help you deal with this issue. I know kids don't come with instruction manuals. You'd be alot happier in your life if you stop dwelling on something you cannot control. God Bless.

Answer 2

What the heck are you talking about? I can't believe that all 4 of your "kids" are MIA, that's terrible. I may not be in my silver years (I'm 28), but I moved in with my Grandfather (Papa) 2mo. ago when my Grandmother (Mimi) went into the hospital and subsequently passed on 2wks later. My mom/aunt & cousin all live in other parts of TX, so I was more than happy to come make sure Papa wasn't lonely/make sure he's eating right and having company everyday. I even quit my job that I'd been at for 2 years and (luckily) found one that allows me to work primarily from my home computer/internet connection so that I could be here for whatever he might need--especially at this time of heartache.

Oh, and I read your blipit on travel (from the retirement question) and if you like hot and humid, why don't you just move down to Corpus Christi, TX....I'll bet you'll find the people are nicer than the place you spoke of, AND as a added bonus, there are destitute available (maybe no more than anywhere else, however) to mimic the "3rd world" atmosphere if you'd like...

Answer 3

i know this is for older people am 27 and have 2 kids of my own my parents are in my life alot i see them at lest 2 times a week if not more my parents love my husband and my children and i can not take that away from them they come to get them every weekend my son is 4 my little girl is 1 but is for my in-laws they live closer then my parents do and we never se them only on Christmas(maybe if the have the time for us) so i kind of know where you are coming from and it hurts all of us but as adults we have to just enjoy what we have and think god we have it and go on as hard as it may be may god be with you and you family during this time

Answer 4

sorry but some people just don't give a stuff, or you have hurt them in the past and what you may have done can't be forgiven, or it can just be you getting older hurts them too much. with childrens attitudes being so disrespectful these days parents are going to be alone or left with their children's mistakes(babies) in the future, theres no respect today. Be Good (i'm 25 years old no kids)

Answer 5

why don’t u try on visiting them give them a surprise visit in this way u’ll c ur grandchildren and u’ll talk to ur children(adults)about what’s wrong and why they don’t visit u...

Answer 6

sorry for you. but it is the life. we all will see the same later. leave them and do not beg them to meet. God is there and do the same to them. keep in touch with me and i will be a good friend of you.

Answer 7

I agree with SASSY. Do some introspection.