I told her that she isnt ready 2 have a baby.i said i didnt want her going down the wrong path, & to have an unhappy life. her & her BF r alrdy living in our house!they dont have a car, so i let them use mine.both havent gone to college & dont make enough money to have a kid.
i tried talking some sense into her but she just got annoyed with me & said i was preaching to her. well she needed to be preached to! they r NOT ready to have a baby. this is my little niece/nephew im talking about! i dont want it to suffer 4 its parents mistake
& she has been with her BF for less than 6 months & they want to start a life together??? our mother is a single parent & she has 2 support 5 ppl inlcluding herself. our life is ghetto enough!! i cant believe my sis is being so selfish.she doesnt realize that having a kid will affect ALL OF US.r home is small & the baby will not even have its own room!
but she just said "so? that doesnt matter. as long as u love it."
i was like WTF. shes crazy
2006-06-25 14:40:25 · 24 answers · asked by Jam 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
But LOVE will not put food on the table, LOVE will not put a roof over ur head & LOVE will most definately not pay the bills. an education & job WILL.
she has already had one miscarriage & she didnt even want the baby @ 1st trying to swallow a milion birth control pills to get rid of it, & now she wants to try & have another?? i saw the miscarriage as her being given a 2nd chance.most teens would jump 4 joy! but now she wants 2 try and ruin her (& our) life again??? & she expects our mother to support her & the baby financially. our poor mother has to work 2 jobs now! i kep telling my sis to pls wait til shes older to have a kid but she wont listen!!!!
what can i do? how do i get her 2 realize all this when ive said it like a hundred times??
2006-06-25 14:40:39 · update #1
someonecanbme
yes i am not an adult myself but i dont want my sister or future niece/nephew to live a ghetto life!!!
i think i know more than she does when it come to this....i wouldnt want her to ruin her life...
2006-06-25 14:45:36 · update #2
You look her square in the eye and say "you are nearly an adult, and you have to make your own decisions in life. I can't stop you from choosing to have a child right now, even though you have no money and no prospects. So if you want to have a baby, you go right ahead. But this is my house and you are driving my car, and I am not putting my resources on the table for you to misuse them by having a child you can't support. So the minute that pregnancy test turns up positive, pack your stuff and get out of my house."
Best of luck and God bless.
2006-06-25 14:45:17 · answer #1 · answered by bobhayes 4 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Your sister needs to realize how much work caring for an infant can be. If anyone you know has a baby (or a toddler even), suggest that your sister babysit the child for a whole day to see if she really likes being a mom.
Also, try to find an social service agency in your area that works with teenage mothers. There might be a counselor at the agency that could help your sister figure out what need she is trying to fulfill by having a child. Your sister should also talk to some of these young mothers and listen to them explain how difficult their lives are now that they have children at such a young age. Perhaps she could babysit for them! Good luck to your family.
2006-06-25 21:48:44 · answer #2 · answered by blueskies7890 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your sister is 17 so she is getting ready to start a life. She is perfectly capable of making her own decisions. I'm not saying that you can't help her in any way. What I'm saying is for you to be there for her and let her know that your worried about her going down the wrong path.
As for her wanting a baby. Let her know that it takes time and be patient about it. Personally, I don't think it is right to start a life when someone is 6 months into the relationship.
2006-06-25 21:49:10 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Where is your Mother in all of this? Why in the world is a 17 year olds boyfriend allowed to live under the same roof? I think you all need some type of counseling-and I am not joking.
2006-06-25 21:48:12 · answer #4 · answered by Kaeos 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sometimes when you have tried all to convince someone not to make an evident huge mistake in their lives and they don't want to listen, all you can do is dettach from the situation, stop feeling responsible about someone else's life and choices. But don't stop loving her no matter what... when she makes that big mistake and the useless bf runs away she'll need you more than ever... and you can't just turn your back on her and tell her: "i told you so"
2006-06-25 21:50:42 · answer #5 · answered by Nia24 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it wouldnt be good for the child to grow up in a home where theur struggling enough financialy, also most 17 year olds arent mature enough to take on that responsibility. normally the reason why teenagers want to have children is because they dont feel as though they are loved enough... maybe show her more attension. hope everything goes well
2006-06-25 21:52:44 · answer #6 · answered by tuchiguajata 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ask her to go volunteer at a day care or some sort of child care facility for one week and then remind her that having a child of her own means taking care of kids is a 24/7 commitment forever. at 17 she needs to be getting herself on track and starting to get her life together before she can start taking care of another person.
2006-06-25 21:49:48 · answer #7 · answered by Debbie W 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try to convince that this may not be the best time for her. Convince that maybe she should settle down first or atleast wait until she is at the right place in her life.
2006-06-25 21:43:11 · answer #8 · answered by blessed_in07 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sheesh. OK, first and foremost, remember that people *will* make stupid decisions. Second, try to find some statistics for your sister to see how much a baby will cost. Facts don't lie.
2006-06-25 21:46:02 · answer #9 · answered by ibkidd37 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ok,if she is all the things you discribed she needs to get an education and she can't afford herself,why bring a baby into this world if it is going to starve
2006-06-25 21:45:02 · answer #10 · answered by almostageniusbutsomuchtoknow 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋