This involves something I saw,and i know if I told my friend it would change her life and hurt her very much.
2006-06-25 13:32:29 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Psychology
p.s. she is my friend and I would not benefit in any way...I am only thinking of her.
2006-06-25 14:01:25 · update #1
I suppose you should tell her, but with tact. I would tell someone if I knew they needed to know. I couldn't continue the friendship, because then it would be like I was being dishonest with them, ya know?
2006-06-25 20:46:04 · answer #1 · answered by BrianL 6 · 6⤊ 3⤋
If you were your friend what would you want your friend to do?
If your friend deserves to know the truth now, then tell her. Before that, think if you are the best person to tell her and if there's no other way that she'll know and she deserves the truth, tell her.
It is important because sometimes we may do the right thing at the wrong time and wrong place.
If the truth you are about to reveal is highly sensitive and that it'll really change her life, you better make sure you're not acting out of impulse even if it's the right thing.
You know the situation... just remember to think about the context of the whole situation. Be honest with your friend and be there for her when things go bad.
2006-06-25 23:23:37 · answer #2 · answered by Jivan S 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The decision is entirely up to you. You have to weigh out the pros and cons - but ultimately, you need to make the decision that YOU can ultimately live with. Will this possibly hurt your friendship? Can you live without guilt if you tell her? Can you live without guilt if you don't? There are more things to consider than just her feelings. You have to think about the repercussions on yourself also. I've always said honesty is the best policy, and I will always tell someone the truth because I know that I will never feel guilty that I kept something from a friend.
2006-06-25 21:00:55 · answer #3 · answered by Krickett 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes...As conflicted as you sound this must be a very good friend with a potentially big problem ahead of her. These kind of situations never lend themselves to a simple solution. She needs to know even at the risk of turning her anger momentarily towards you, but she'll soon realize you were thinking of and looking out for her best interests. If she finds out that you knew and DIDN'T tell her it could drive a wedge between the two of you that can never be removed. It's one of those "Catch 22" things that are very difficult, but I think you have the strength, courage and the wisdom to do what's right in a way that's right and she will see that she has a true friend indeed.
2006-06-25 21:39:48 · answer #4 · answered by Striker 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My personal opinion is yes. If someone is my friend, I feel it is my obligation to protect them from additional hurt. The trick is differentiating between what what will cause additional hurt and what won't. I would also be angry with a friend who did not tell me something they knew because they were afraid of hurting me. In the end, finding out the hurtful news AND I would have made different choices if I had known was most painful.
2006-06-25 20:37:37 · answer #5 · answered by jd 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My best guess here dearest is that this involves someone cheating on someone else. Whatever the situation, it is probably best to inform your friend, so that they can make more intelligent decisions in regards to this situation. Explain what you saw or how you feel with poise and respect, and I'm sure you will be received well.
On a side note, you have the most alluring image I have seen here in a long time, perhaps we could discuss this further?
2006-06-26 10:57:16 · answer #6 · answered by Fun and Games 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can't answer this completely without more details.
In general if what you are going to say is something that can protect the person then by all means let them know. If you are saying something because it makes you feel better to tell them but provides the other person no benefit, keep your mouth shut.
2006-06-25 20:54:47 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hmmm. a lot to weigh here. This is an 'ethical' question. Would you tell someone their girlfriend used to be a guy if they didn't have a clue and all they could talk about was how great the sex was. Would you want to know the girlfriend you just got through eating out used to a man...?!
2006-06-25 20:44:23 · answer #8 · answered by Big O 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's a very broad question. You need to weigh the alternative of if she never knows the truth, will that be worse? If so, you should really consider telling her.
2006-06-25 20:37:15 · answer #9 · answered by Just Me 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, as a friend it is your duty to tell the truth, even if it hurts.
2006-06-25 21:34:13 · answer #10 · answered by Adam 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you wanting to know because you really care about your friend or is there another reason to tell her? if you know something and you are truely her friend and you feel she needs to know then you should tell her, but only if your doing it for her out of the goodness of your heart.
2006-06-25 20:41:15 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋