I am a divorced father of the 2 best daughters in the world, I have always been involved in their lives, they are soon to be 11 and 13. My current job is dead end, and I have a great opportunity for a job 1-1/2 hrs away. My girls want me to move for two reasons, 1 they will be a lot closer to their cousins, aunt and uncle, 2 they really feel like they are in the middle of my ex and I. I never bad mouth their mom and never will. We do a lot of switching now, wed/thurs overnight with me, and every other weekend. Both of my girls have stated they want to come and live with me very soon after I move, which is more than okay with me. They know how much I love them and I will always do anything for them, they are my life. My ex has told my kids if they come live with me that they will never see her again, how do you answer that? I told them that was a selfish comment and you never have to worry about losing me as your father, I am proud and I love them more than anything!
2006-06-25 12:32:46 · 9 answers · asked by wolf1230pack 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
You need to stay close to the girls and their mother. They need to stay with mom because they need her guidance. You need to tell them that. Stay single so you can devote your time to the girls until they are 18.
Good luck!
G.G.
2006-06-25 12:36:33 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
Sounds like your ex is very selfish and bitter about the divorce. It's sad that she has to involve the kids like that. 1 1/2 hrs away is not really that far. You need to do what's best for you and continue to be the great father that you are and everything will work out. Your kids are old enough to 'see' how things are.
I am sure your ex will regret what she said once she has time to think about it. My philosophy has always been, "Think before you speak and don't say anything that you don't mean." Never could get my ex to think like that though.
Keep doing what you're doing and good luck to you!!
2006-06-25 20:06:40 · answer #2 · answered by CoolBreeze 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's a tough call - only you know best. Sounds like your relationship with the girls could survive just fine if you didn't see them quite as often. (Assuming they don't move in with you.) Continue to tell them that you are there for them without putting down their mother, sounds like she's feeling insecure because of your relationship with them. But they do need both parents. Traveling back and forth can be very difficult for everyone but it certainly is doable and might be worth it for the better job and relatives. A little distance between you and the ex could be a good thing. Good luck, it sounds like you are a good father and will continue to be.
2006-06-25 19:45:56 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You do whats right for you and if you r ex realy does end up doing that then you have the conversation with your girls. But don't trust your ex's angry comments, they may just be that. Angry words hurt and I'm sure your girls know this all to well so hold off on telling them that "Mom is going to dump you if you move in with me" because it's to hard for them to prepare for when they might not need too.So you get your job and improve your life because that is good for the girls.
2006-06-25 19:44:24 · answer #4 · answered by Justbeingme 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would do what is best for you and your family. If the kids would enjoy a better life being close to there family then so be it. I'm sure your ex just told them that out of spite I think after she has calmed down and reality set in she will learn to accept the change and remain involved in their lives.
2006-06-25 19:35:18 · answer #5 · answered by shae 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well your ex is really f*ed up because what kind of mother says to their children that they will never see her again. i know how it is with my family my parents have so much hate for each other and even after nine years being divorced they dont talk, i used to live with my mom till about 2 years ago until i got into this big fight with her and it ended by her saying that if i dont change to go live with my father. . . and so i did and now she is kicking herself in her moth b'cuz of that. leave the decision to your daughters dont push them and then the mother will maybe realize what she has said.
2006-06-25 19:39:33 · answer #6 · answered by markski037 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OMG there old enough to have a opinion of there own, I think you and your ex need a heart to heart, but as a mom if my daughter said I wanted to live with Dad and if he was a stand up guy I would let her go but yes I would feel wounded and hurt but to say that to your kids is uncalled for
2006-06-25 19:43:05 · answer #7 · answered by twistedsingle 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go ahead and move if your girls want you to and if they want to live with you, that's good, too. Sounds like your x is using unfair tactics to keep her daughters close.
2006-06-25 19:38:27 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i would get some one new and brake his ****** hart for telling my kids that ill go to his house with my hole hole hole family and take tolet papper ,burn it and will its burning illtro it in his windo ,the the hour later ill ger his girl friend and jump her or throu her out the windo or maby punch ger skoce her and like at 300 am go home take a bath and go to bed leaving no trace of wath happend tha way that derty hole son of a bich will get wath he desrvs for telling my douthers what he told thee .if the calll the cops i will get out i have my ways
oh or you can kill him and his wife this way no one can know what happend only u
2006-06-25 19:49:31 · answer #9 · answered by baby boy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋