hubby thought it was my fault we havent got kids.dr says i'm ok.he wont go 2 dr he says not him? wot do i do/

Question

i am fertiely.hubby says he wont go as he is not sterile.i do want children?wot sholud i do?i have told him i love him and always will>

Answer 1

Definitely tell him he can't blame you until he gets checked. Also, don't try too often. Make him wait a week (or as long as he can) in between tries if you're trying to get pregnant. Doing it every day is what you do for fun, not if you're trying to get pregnant.

Answer 2

He knows he might be the one to have problems underneath but he is scared to face the truth. It is a macho thing how can anything be wrong with him. If you have been to the doctor and you are ok he has got to go to check everything is in working order. If he won`t talk to you try writing him a letter telling him what your doctor said about you. You could ask your doctor for advice first as to what he recommends. It is not a definate no that you cant have a baby. Perhaps there is a slight problem needs tweaking to get everything sorted. If not you might have to try IVF if you can but there may be other options. The best thing is for your doctor you and your hubby get together and sort it out. Be understanding and never throw it in his face that he is infertile if he is. But it might not be that. Good Luck and don`t give up.

Answer 3

You just have to let him work this out in his own head.

You can try making sure that he doesn't smoke, drink, wear tight trousers or underpants. You can try giving him an iron supplement and making sure he eats only healthy food.

Still, if he had mumps as a teen or pre-teen, if he had cancer treatments or he injured himself, those things won't cure infertility.

They don't test a woman's fertility until after her husband has been tested.

Male fertility is so much easier and less invasive to test. All he has to do is make a "deposit" into a cup and, under a microscope, they check how many sperm there are and how they're moving.

Unless your husband has other children with other women, he has no way of knowing he isn't fertile.

Answer 4

It takes two to tango, or make a baby. If you know that you are able to conceive, then you don't have to be Einstein to figure out where the problem is.
Your Husband might not want to go to the doctor because he thinks it's going to be an awkward exam, etc. In fact all he has to do is produce a sample to be analyzed by a lab. This can be done at home (offer to help him!!) and brought in after.
Tell your Husband that having a child can be the most rewarding experience in life, and that his stubbornness is robbing you both.

Answer 5

Take the help of any other close friend/relative in convincing your husband.He is scared. Probably scared of losing your love if any thing goes wrong.Clarify to him that you would still be loving him whatever the doctor finds.Stress upon him that it is not the matter of love but the matter regarding planning the family.Clarify that if nothing can be done, both of you can go for adoption or any other option and it requires his co-operation.It would have better impact if any other common friend or elderly relation of the family on whom your husband has confidence tries to convince.Persuation will help.

Answer 6

Ceise all sex untill he agrees to go to the doctor. That has always been the best way to make a man to do something.

That is typical way of thinking for a MAN. He is Always OK, and the woman is to be blamed for all.

I'm a man and I was the one who went to the Dr. to see if I was fertile or not. I had no doubts about my GF's/wife's fertility. Although we had been trying to make a baby for 18 months, I never had a thought that anything was wrong with her.

So, be brave and make him see a doctor for sperm exam. If it turns out to be good, than see another specialist for other advices. But first make him aware that he is not superman. Good luck.

Answer 7

Sounds like a tough situation to be in, I am sorry. It also sounds like you really need to sit him down, maybe even with the dr so he can hear that you don’t have a problem conceiving, and you could pre talk to the dr and let him know how your hubby feels so maybe he can approach it carefully. I am sure he has a lot of practice of talking to men who are trying to protect there pride.

I wish you the best of luck!!!

Answer 8

You maybe ovulating at a different time hon. Get the basil body temp charts and thermometer and use it for a few months. If nothing happens after that I think it's safe to assume hubby has a low sperm count whether he faces it or not is up to him. Just how much you want children as opposed to how much you love him is up to you.

Answer 9

He may not be sterile, but it might still be down to his little fellas. When I was tested it turned out I had plenty of sperm but they weren't swimming very well. The doctor's advice - take one aspirin a day. Within 3 months Mrs Eck was pregnant. It's nothing to be ashamed of, and the joy that Miss Eck has brought Mrs Eck and I is worth any amount of embarassment that comes from handing in a pot of warm (it had to be VERY fresh) sperm to the receptionist at the pathology lab! (though it might be best keeping this little detail from him until it's too late)

Good luck.

Answer 10

If your husband won't go then don't push him. He may be in denial of his condition unless he has fathered children in the past. If that is the case maybe there are other reasons for the lack of pregnancy....stress, too much pressure to conceive, maybe low sperm count. I would suggest that you attempt to find out why he is so against going, maybe consider being a foster parent or adoption.

Answer 11

tell him that you will both do what ever it take to have childern, it doesnt matter weather it's him or you, anyways tell him it could just be unexplained fertitly problems (some people have all the tests and stuff then they get told it unexplained fertilly) if that dosent work tell him you will stop nagging him to death if he goes with you just the once to do the sprem test, also tell him that there's things they can do for low sperm anyways even if he did.

if all that doesnt convince him you need to ask him weather he's seroius about wanting kids with you, ...... might give him the kick up the backside he needs.

to be honest i think he's just scared about what they will find try and resure him as well.

take care xx