i drive a truck 4 a livin to provide for my family. would come home tired .wife wanted to things together i was too tired to do themwith her. i would bring work home with me ie.,negative parts of it to wind down. not realizing the effects it had on my our marriage. Came home one day wife is crying and said she lost spark.at first she say she thinks its her.i believe im the cause of it all.just by the remarks i make not realizing she was interpiting it diferrently.she'd buy clothes wanting feed back from me .as again i didnt show the effection she wanted.id come home spend time with our 18month old son or should i say catch up.wish i never became a truck driver.i thought i was doing her a favor by being with him and ignoring her at the same time.got a local job staying at a friends house to save gas and give wife space .we've gone on dates since then.some times i believe its getting better.then when i try to show effection we're back to square 1. what can i do get my wife back?
2006-06-25 05:11:58 · 10 answers · asked by wingnut 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Send her flowers and a note with words from your heart. tell her how much you love her and need her in your life and how important your family is to you. Tell her you want to come back home "on her terms". That seem pretty one sided. But maybe she was trying to do the right thing all along. The hardest part is having patience. Give her time to reflect. Remember you have a son in the picture too. Spend some quality time with him. Take him out to the park, the zoo, Chuck E Cheese. After a few Daddy and me times maybe you can invite her along. If only there were more fathers like you who wants to work on their relationship the world would be a better place. And remember also that the best gift you can give your son is to love his mother. Good luck hun
2006-06-25 05:24:26 · answer #1 · answered by asoldierswife 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
the way u described the problem was very sincere and, in it, u took a good part of the responsibility. Good for you. As far as getting the spark back in your marriage (a problem I also face), the only part of it that u can control is YOU. It's like an apology. You can give it, but she doesnt have to accept it.
Keep trying to show affection, but remember a guy's definition of that may be "here's a six pack and now let's get in bed" while a woman's definition may be different.
If u show that u sincerely wanna get the flame back to the good old way, and if u do it repeatedly, she will eventually get your signal. You gotta have hope. Dont we all?
2006-06-25 05:19:53 · answer #2 · answered by Theycouldntkillkenny 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
plan a romatic date @ home by cooking dinner dim lighting in the bedroom etc... hav a day off work to prepare and make sure shes out of the house while u prepare it, maybe ask a friend or family to look after ur son for the nite? this wil at least get everything goin and you'll b sure to get a few sparks, just use the oppurtunity to talk a bit and start over, try to say sweet things 2 her every morning like u look gorgeous 2day etc. and just try 2 spend time wid both of u spending time wid ur child 2gether and hav some family trips out. u'll b sure to b bac on track in no time! and remember to keep complementin her! good luck ! x
2006-06-25 05:19:49 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to her about how you are feeling... be completely honest with her.. and even more so find out how she is feeling let her share it with you and LISTEN! tell her that you will be more than willing to do anything to make her happy and if she asks for certain changes..even if it's finding another job... do it as immediately as possible.. this will show her that you are serious and that you truly value her over everything else...
with the baby... i think its great you are attentive to him...keep it up an never let it go...and she does love that BUT never do you believe that loving your child compensates for your love to her.. remember before the baby there was you and her... always keep that idea alive alive...end note.. she might be going through that not necessarily because of you ...she might be going through changes and reflecting on her life and all that... sometimes it gets to them.. be supportive and always reassure her that everything is okay and with you two working together you'll make it through!!!/.. I really hope this help friend.. good luck and keep us posted....
2006-06-25 05:22:24 · answer #4 · answered by The Thinker 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You may want to think about a different career that would allow you to be home more. While the money is probably very good, it really doesn't mean much when no one is happy. You may want to help around the house if you can (without her having to ask). It sounds like she just wants to spend time with you. Time is worth more than any paycheck. Good luck to you and your family.
2006-06-25 05:24:39 · answer #5 · answered by back_in_nd_ok 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to each other. Its gonna take alot of hard work. I think you both are willing to work at it. It is gonna take time. Things will work out, you just can't get too comfortable and start taking each other for granted again. Its all about the work though. It depends on if she is willing to go through all of it for you. Good luck.
2006-06-25 05:37:33 · answer #6 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think all your problems rooted from two most important things in maintaining relationships: open communication, quality time and (the third is trust). work on having open, honest communication with her, how she feels, how you feel, and you should communicate A LOT.... and of course must spend as much time with her... perhaps the third, trust, is not the main issue right now... think about it...
2006-06-25 05:19:07 · answer #7 · answered by hsmnt 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Seek a Marrital counciler ASAP
you can also begin reading
His Needs, Her Needs, By Willard harley jr.
this can help you understand a Marrital Relationship.
God Bless
2006-06-25 05:29:57 · answer #8 · answered by Sully 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First...get yourself back! If your wife loves you she'll follow. If that fails nothing sparks someones attention like a little competition.
2006-06-25 05:17:32 · answer #9 · answered by timothybradley 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I hope she sees that you love and cherish her. I see it in your words.
Make your living where u are until you can find other for better pay.
Women can foget all their hurts when our man holds us, looks us deep in our eyes, and says, "I love you so much for being who you are in my life", and then kisses us, hugs us. Tell her you know she gets lonely, but hang in there for you. Tell her (and mean it), that soon things will get better.
2006-06-25 05:33:58 · answer #10 · answered by garayfive 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋