when I am not sure I actually love him. He is lovely, kind man, but I somehow think there is something or someone better around the corner and I hesitate to say yes, I will marry him. I am well over my 30's and am concerned that this will be my only chance to get married. I can honestly say I like him and respect him, but in that case is it wrong to marry him if I respect him, but know that I do not love him now. Maybe friendship could lead to love, but then maybe not. Has anyone had similar experiences?
2006-06-25 00:23:03 · 29 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
no you shouldnt marry him not now. its not fair to him for you to just hold onto him till maybe something comes along better. he deserves happiness and if he is looking for marriage and your not let him go and stay friends.so many get married for the just because reason only to end in divorce and hurting each other. honesty is the best way to go. i think if you read what you just wrote you will know the right answer.
2006-06-25 00:32:47 · answer #1 · answered by sweeetkisses2 3 · 6⤊ 1⤋
The right answer is yes... or in ur case, probably 'no'. The fact that you ask this question shows that you don't think he is marriage material.. So what if you are over 30.. you have managed to stay true to yourself and be independent all this while, why the sudden need to settle for less? It's sad to marry only for marriage sake. If he finds out, he will feel sorely used. Very unfair for him and you. You do not want to wake up 5 years down the line and realise you have made the greatest mistake. Marry the guy that you cant live without and who you simply have to be with. Not any guy that ask you to marry him..
2006-06-25 07:36:28 · answer #2 · answered by J*LO 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you must ask the answer is no. When you truly love someone you don't care what anyone thinks about them and you would not hesitate to answer. If you marry him then you will not be friend like you are now. Also you need to let him go or you will never find the one you truly love and it's not far for him. However you need to make sure you don't love him cause if you love him and you think the grass is green then be careful cause it's not!! But don't stay in a place were your not happy nobody will win in the end.
2006-06-25 07:47:47 · answer #3 · answered by brown eyes 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need love in order to weather the storms of life that come. Look at it like this: marriage is a one way street and there is no such thing as divorce. Could you do it then? My best friend just told me yesterday that her boyfriend broke up with her and said that he never loved her nor was attracted to her. What?! She should've known this a long time ago! My husband's ex-wife said the same thing when they broke up. Tell him that you aren't sure if you actually love him. You all need to talk from there. Honesty feels so good because it creates truth and understanding, especially in a relationship. If you can't feel gratitude and contentment where you are today, then obviously you are not in the right place. Don't settle and don't make HIM settle for less than what you believe you can have. Age is inconsequential.
2006-06-25 07:40:36 · answer #4 · answered by Sleek 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
why think like that, saying something or someone better than you is waiting.? if he ask you to marry him that should tell you he loves you and wants to. i don't think your in love with him, you might love the person he is, but your not in love thats for sure or you wouldn't be asking these questions. because your heart will tell you if it's right, and if your heart is telling you to ask all of us, well..... thats your answer' give yourself some time to think about this ok? good luck
2006-06-25 07:40:20 · answer #5 · answered by jenna 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you have 3 choices: yes, no and not yet. and don't be desperate!! you have plenty of time to decide. the question is: do you two get along well together? i've learned the in alot of cases (people i know) love or lust changes into like over time, anyway. if you're having this much trouble deciding, go for the not yet
2006-06-25 07:40:26 · answer #6 · answered by oldguy 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if u like and respect him u have to don't break him heart doesn't matter if u accept or not u have to be honnest with him and with ur self think about it carefuly and slowly (by the night if u can) try to see the good and the bad things of this wedding and tell him, god give a mouth to talk each others so use it and tell him what u feel he will understand
good luck
2006-06-25 07:37:30 · answer #7 · answered by harry03000 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Chance is coming to you. You know that in this era, nobody asks for marriaage, says yes without any hesitation
2006-06-25 07:26:53 · answer #8 · answered by manalonedubai 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, i haven't, but if you have any doubts, it would be wrong for you to marry. 30 is not old and you will have other chances. Don't do for the reason you have stated.
2006-06-25 09:04:37 · answer #9 · answered by doglady 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This has to be your decision, we are not the one who have been proposed too.
Consider the time you have known him, does he have a good secure job?
Can he support you?
Think - about what you want:
I also think you two would be better off remaining good friends until you can say yes or no...
2006-06-25 07:37:42 · answer #10 · answered by Angel Wings 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋