I've posted a dilema I 'm having with a male friend of mine. We used to date. We no longer date. I'm married. He respects that, and I have nothing but respect for my husband and I would never cheat on him.
Why do I always have at least one person who assumes that I'm having an affair because I've had the same male friend for 11 years? My husband has seen me interact with this man. He's stayed with us in our house when he's had problems. He trusts us together. Why can't people understand this?
2006-06-24 15:41:58 · 32 answers · asked by Gabby_Gabby_Purrsalot 7 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
People have goddamned dirty minds (and that's the truth!) they are evil as hell (people) I find. I think you are sweet. You are respectful of two people/both men and what's wrong with that? They are (both) lucky to have you! You are one lucky lady. You can have two friends/males to talk to! (sigh.. I'm a bit envious.. I've no one, not really. I'm married, but he's odious. I'm not allowed to 'have friends' either sex!) People won't change either, sweetheart. (just hang around with the ones that DO treat you nicely, ok.? I'd hate for a sweet person like yourself to be 'tainted' with this negative thinking!) Who'd suffer for it? not them.. (you!) oh, and also the men perhaps (if you cut one of 'em off.. or change this arrangement.) I hope you stay friends (with both men) for a very long time, m'dear!! ignore the bad people... (they never go away.. just ignore the **** out of 'em.)
2006-06-24 15:47:33 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 5⤊ 0⤋
You have been given many reasons and opinions as to why. Now put yourself in an outsiders position:
I Have 6 to 12 men whom visit my home every month or so. My husband, being the bread winner usually is not at home... Seeing all these men (pradon the pun) come and go, SOME people think that I am having a grand ole time...Affairs.
What does it sound like to you all?
we have a close family - these men are brothers- his an mine, nephews, a repairman (not in a sign covered truck)...
As long as your husband is aware and okay with this...then just tell others that if they are jealous that you are having more fun than them, then they should get their own lover and quit fantasizing about you and your friend.
2006-06-25 10:13:03 · answer #2 · answered by 4mom 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
People are either looking out for your husband or just don't share the same thing you have with your male friend.
i once had a coworker worry all day and than tell me right before the end of work that he saw "Mike" out last night with another girl. I said thats ok I was home with my husband. We all worked together for 6 months and the closest we shared made others think we were a couple, ps my husband also worked with us
2006-06-24 15:47:06 · answer #3 · answered by G L 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
because people are immature and naturally think the worst of people. And that many of those types of relationships turn the other way down the road. I have a friend whose current wife and he were friends since they were in grade school. Her husband trusted them and one night things got a little bit more than just friends. It is great for them now because they are happily married but in general that type of thing happens. Congrats and best of luck on keeping it just friends!
2006-06-24 15:47:06 · answer #4 · answered by Sarah 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
People have suspious minds or just plain nosey which all points to their insecurities not yours. Do not let other people add their worries or fears onto your relationship. Every relationship is different and no matter what @ the end of the day it is just ur husband and u who have to deal w/whatever comes your way. As long as the guy knows that u love ur husband and he is not trying to mess that up - be friends w/him.
2006-06-24 15:47:39 · answer #5 · answered by camlankolche 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What does it matter what other people think? If you, your husband, and your friend are all cool, then it makes no difference what anyone else thinks. And kudos to you and your husband for having a good, solid, relationship built on TRUST, something most people these dys just can't grasp!
2006-06-24 15:55:11 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
This dude is just waiting for there to be a weak moment in the marital vows ( there will be ) and he will be there to massage you girl. Nope, you'll never cheat . You just wanna keep a safety net man around . Once the hubby acts up a bit and friction rises , safety boy will soothe you and before you know it , it's sack time. You slippery sloper !
2006-06-24 15:48:45 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Because these days, nobody believes that a platonic relationship can exist between a male and a female without any form of hanky- panky going on. This is mainly because people, I think have become more perverse than they once were.
2006-06-24 15:47:07 · answer #8 · answered by Inquisitive 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
because this day and age all people think about is sex and cheating. i mean if you were on the outside looking in what would you think. piece of advice as long as you and your hubby know the truth don't care what anybody else thinks. who do you come home to? Who do you sleep with every night? the people on the outside have nothing better to do then to create drama in someone Else's life because they have a boring life of there own.
2006-06-24 15:50:26 · answer #9 · answered by sherrylynn3669 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
People only see what they want to see and they will only believe what they want to. You need to try not to let it bother you as far as what they think because the people who it should really matter are you, your husband, and the friend. As long as the three of you know and believe the truth who cares what the others think.
2006-06-24 15:55:34 · answer #10 · answered by ezachowski 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋