My dad passed in 2004, and the shock of it has passed, and now I am missing him alot. If any of you have had?

Question

a loved one pass away tell me how you deal with it? Somedays are better than others. Also do you believe that our loved ones are still with us in some way? And if you believe this is there a story you can tell me about how they have contacted you? I am not depressed I just miss having him around, and miss his hugs and kisses.

I liked alot of your answers, and was so impressed that you would take the time to help me when I was going thru a moment. Yal have given me hope that there are still very nice and sweet people in this world. Thank you :) I am putting the answer up to a vote because I can not make up my mind. My favorite three was

Cutiepie,Needy,CC tho.

Answer 1

try doing special little things on days that were special to u both, like , a favorite resturant u both liked or something of that nature, light a candle in his memory at them times , i still grieve for my brother mother and father at times ,and yes sometimes they come to me in my dreams which i treasure,my bro dided in 1982 my mom in 1990 and my dad in 1998,missing them never stops , and i really don't want it to , cause that would make there lives meaningless , and they all had a special purpose in my life

Answer 2

My grandfather passed away in october 2001, just a few days before my birthday... I didn't feel very joyous on my birthday ever since... The shock of taking him on the last journey wore off pretty quickly indeed. I remember I didn't cry at the funeral. I just couldn't do it. And time passed, without me giving it any more thought... Until last year. Since then, I've started missing him a lot. Last year I was in Italy. This was his lifelong dream, to go there... And I felt like I was doing it for him... There I have dreamed him, resting serenely on a bench in the park. I sat next to him and we talked... I was telling him all that he has missed since his departure, and he was just smiling and approving with his head... He asked me some things, I don't remember what (I think it was if I finished school, if I have a job, a sweetheart...) That dream, although I have a poor recollection of it (just some scarce images stuck into my mind) filled me at that time with much peace and optimism... And I was in dire needs of them then, as I am now.
I cannot tell you how to deal with such pain, nobody can... The best way is to focus on doing something and generally keeping busy. Time will work for you to heal the wounds... Yes, indeed some days are better than others. My greatest pain is that I didn't know well enough my grandfather while he was alive. This is something I'll have to live with for sometime...
Our loved ones never leave us completely. I am convinced of it. You may not be always aware of it, but they are near you every single moment, to watch over you and guide you...
Take care, and smile a bit each day. It helps...

Answer 3

My dad passed in 1978 and I still miss him. About 2 weeks after he died, he did contact me. I didn't see him the day he died and I was very upset cause his death was sudden. I heard his footsteps coming down the hall and he entered my bedroom. I was not sleeping and I saw his shadow. I froze and couldn't move. I wanted to scream but I couldn't utter a word. Then he put his arms around me and hugged me and told me that everything would be alright. After he released me I felt a comfort and I knew that I would be ok. But that didn't stop the pain of losing him. That will never ever go away. But my dad lives in my heart and always will. I think about the good times and what a good person he was. I still cry silently on holidays and birthdays, and my children will never know him and that's such a loss for them. Think about your dad and smile when you remember his hugs and kisses. The pain will ease with time, but the memories will last your lifetime.

Answer 4

My son, age 26 passed away in 2004. It was unexpected. As you say, the shock has passed but now we miss him terribly. Not a minute goes by that I don't think of him. Yes I believe they are still with us. My other children will be driving around in their car talking about their brother when the radio will turn up louder. My lamp flickers on and off when I talk about him. So yes, I do believe. I have to believe to get through this. I miss him so much. I keep thinking I will see him standing in the doorway. But no. Keep the faith.

Answer 5

Well .. my best friend was shot when i was 9 years old .. she was like my sister .. and i had such a rough time .. i didnt want to be here anymore and .... i remember laying in my bath tub .. trying to drown myself & i couldnt seem to do it ..& i started crying and praying god just take me away .. & as i was praying i got a really strong feeling that everyyhing was going to be ok and that shaynia wouldnt want this ... i was still sad that night i had drawn a picture of a angel to give to her mom .. and i hadnt drawn wings .. i feel asleep @ the table and i woke up .. in my picture there were wings .. w/the words ill be w. you on it .... i went all around my house to see if someone was awke and got up and drew it .. and everyone was asleep .... when i went back to the table .. on that picture it wasn't there any more ....that was so comfuting to me and still to this day i am so thankful she came & did tha tso i would know .. any tim ei think about her and it is still so hard for me to handle ..the only way i find comfurting is thinking about that night ..

they may not be able to be seen but they are still w/ us!

Answer 6

My mom handed at the same time as i become 7.. i turned right into a perplexed and quiet.. She were unwell in uncomplicated phrases 6 months previously she handed. I knew I might want to cry yet did no longer have the right thoughts on the instantaneous.. become numb I submit to in innovations.. yet after I had my daughters, i realized what I ignored out on, and how confusing it become for my mom to go away 5 youngsters behind.. i think the loss has made me a mom who has loved each day of existence with my husband and daughters.. My dad handed at the same time as i become 21, at that age I only ignored him and felt assorted anger.. Now I wish i'd have him over, and practice dinner him dinner.. See him with my relations.. continually continually in our Hears...

Answer 7

This is maybe an appropriate song lyric. Its by Mike and The Mechanics called In The Living Years. Its about missing your father who has died. Theres a somewhat current version by Russ Lee of this song on the Christian stations.
My father died of early onset Alzheimers Disease about 20 years ago. He wasn't even 60.
Sorry but I have Christian beliefs and don't believe in being contacted by someone who has died. I believe in the possibility of being reunited with loved ones in heaven someday though.

Every generation
Blames the one before
And all of their frustrations
Come beating on your door

I know that Im a prisoner
To all my father held so dear
I know that Im a hostage
To all his hopes and fears
I just wish I could have told him in the living years

Crumpled bits of paper
Filled with imperfect thought
Stilted conversations
Im afraid thats all weve got

You say you just dont see it
He says its perfect sense
You just cant get agreement
In this present tense
We all talk a different language
Talking in defence

Say it loud, say it clear
You can listen as well as you hear
Its too late when we die
To admit we dont see eye to eye

So we open up a quarrel
Between the present and the past
We only sacrifice the future
Its the bitterness that lasts

So dont yield to the fortunes
You sometimes see as fate
It may have a new perspective
On a different day
And if you dont give up, and dont give in
You may just be o.k.

Say it loud, say it clear
You can listen as well as you hear
Its too late when we die
To admit we dont see eye to eye

I wasnt there that morning
When my father passed away
I didnt get to tell him
All the things I had to say

I think I caught his spirit
Later that same year
Im sure I heard his echo
In my babys new born tears
I just wish I could have told him in the living years

Say it loud, say it clear
You can listen as well as you hear
Its too late when we die
To admit we dont see eye to eye

Answer 8

My dad died when I was 26 in 1996. I still miss him, still talk about him, and still wish I could ask his oppinion on this or that. I wish he could meet his grandkids too....

but I also understand that death is part of life, and that my dad would not have wanted me to stop living my life, just because he isnt arround anymore.

I think that his spirit is always arround us, but the "something's missing" feeling will never go away.

Answer 9

My Paw passed away two years ago, he raised me when my mom and dad had to many "problems" to take care of me. He was part of my exstence and when he died I mourned him hard. Im a big Sylvia Browne fan and I have read all of her books. And I know my paw is here with me watching over me. Just like your dad is there with you, smiling at all the good things you do. One night I was very depressed and had just lost my baby due to crib death. I thought my world had ended, and as I was sitting on the bed I felt something hug me and all the pain left me. That night I dreamed that my paw sat on my bed and told me, that he had hugged me and took all the pain away from me and he told me how much he loved me and how my lil Heaven Marie was there with him and he would look after her like he did me....that eased my mind so much that I could function and be a good mom to my son who had suffered so much by my depression. So always believe your father is there with you cuz he is. And when he is ready he will let you know it too. Memories is all we have left sometimes of the loved ones we lost, dont let them die and they wont leave you...hugs and good luck

Answer 10

There are seven stages of grief that people go through after losing a loved one.

It sounds like you are past denial, anger, and negotiation.

A persons "footprint" on your life can and will have everlasting and effects on you if you connected with that person on a significant level.

Sometimes one of the ways we can celebrate a persons life after loosing them is by remembering and practising their values in our own lives.

Just remember one thing when looking for solice: Your loved one would want you to move on and life a full and happy life.

Occupying yourself with things that you cannot change may keep your life stagnant and prevent you from living life to the fullest, the way it should be lived. That is what your loved one would hope and wish for you; so celebrate their lives by moving on to enjoy yours.

Best of Luck to you and my condolences for your loss