Alright here is the situation i have the most wonderful wife in the world she does practically everything for me but my eyes still tend to wonder off and see what else is out there! I must say i did get married at a you age (19). I dont know what to do cause i know i have a very good women but for some reason i dont want to be with her and i want to be with other women what do i do? How do i get over this? Is it just a phase or will it eventually go away?
2006-06-24 09:34:00 · 47 answers · asked by Quolaid 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You scum bag. You got married, it was your free will that chose to say "I do". Now do it! Don't get divorced just because you want to. That is so selfish and self-serving. Think about your wife and her feelings for a moment will you. Stay faithful, and love your wife as you love yourself. Don't be a jerk and leave.
2006-07-08 03:56:41 · answer #1 · answered by springdewfairy 4 · 0⤊ 2⤋
You need to stop and ask yourself one question, do you love your wife? If you have any hesitations or you know you don't love her then you need to end your marriage now. There is no reason to be married to someone while you are still wanting to be with other women. Your wife does not deserve to be in a marriage where her husband is not faithful. Some people who get married at a young age do still find the need to be with other people. I married at 18 and I am now 27 and still married to the same guy. I am not going to tell you it has been all happy go lucky for 9 years, because it hasn't been. He still seems to flirt with other women, and he has cheated on me in the past. I know now that if he was to cheat on me again our marriage would be over. And our marriage should have been over when he cheated the first time. I guess I was just to young to understand. So if you are sure you actually truly love your wife then trust me that this phase you are going through will eventually go away. Try spending more time with her to get your mind off of other women.
2006-07-05 08:31:51 · answer #2 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have the same problem...i was married and could not keep my mind/thought from wondering...or keep them under control...i cheated on my husband 2 times )yes i know it is bad). Besides my husband every other relationship i have ever been in i cheated. It seems like no matter what i have or how good it is i want more or something else. I came to the conclusion, I am not meant to be married or in a serious relationship...not any time soon that is.Here is the thing that you have to ask yourself, can you control these urges and whatnot, because if you cannot all you will do is hurt your wife and yourself...so maybe it would be better to get out of the marriage...its a hard thing to do but the truth is if it will make you happy than thats what matters becaues if you are not happy then no one around you will, that inckudes your wife...
2006-07-07 18:07:35 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No doubt your young age when you married probably DOES play a part in all of this. My advice to you is to sit her down and talk to her about what you feel. It would take courage (but if you care about her at all, you will find a way to do this-) you could show her the question you've just asked, and the answers you have received thus far, let her read them, with you by her side. Let the ensuing discussion take place. It's the only right and fair way to deal with your feelings in such a way that respects her as a human being, and as someone you have cared about. Maybe, just maybe- she's been feeling the same way- but not known how to tell you. Even if not, communication with her is key. Especially since I sense that you don't want to hurt her- and though the "truth" may hurt, the lie you're living now will hurt her worse later on- and more so as time goes by, because eventually, no matter how hard you may try to "hide it", she will uncover it, and it will hurt her less now than later. And you never know, but maybe you can work through this together- or separately, and end up back together later on down the line. Be honest with her, as you have with yourself. You owe her at least that much.
2006-07-07 18:54:42 · answer #4 · answered by It's Ms. Fusion if you're Nasty! 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As I tell my husband - You can look but you can't touch. If the only thing wrong with your wife is familiarity, why don't you look into doing some things together that you haven't done before. You also need to look at why you want to be with the other women? You are doing you and your WONDERFUL wife a disservice. Try learning about your wife besides the fact that she does everything for you - what do you do for her? What are you seeing in these other women that you are liking - is it that they are young?, they are slim, dressed in very little and very revealing? Take a good look at your wife - treat her to a spa day where she can get a makeover (I know that I don't wear makeup as much as I did when my husband and were first married), treat her to a day of shopping and let her get a new outfit, something that will make you look at her.
2006-07-03 08:40:17 · answer #5 · answered by mom of girls 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just because you got married DOESN'T mean that you DIED. Looking is not a bad thing - unless you act upon it. Remember why you got married in the first place, and understand that looks are NOT forever. What happens when they get old? Would the risk of losing what you yourself describe as the most wonderful wife in the world for even the most beautiful hot woman in the world really be worth it? Let the eye candy be just that, and love your wife for what she is!
2006-07-06 12:31:29 · answer #6 · answered by Rockmeister B 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
19 is young. But if you truely love her you need to work on making the marriage better for the two of you.
You see your wife as a mother to your children, as the woman who cleans your house and cooks your food.
It is time for you to see her in a different light.
Get a babysitter for a weekend and foreget about everything in life and rekindle your romance. Maybe buy a book about positions. Rent a romantic movie. Hold hands. In short seduce each other until you are about to explode. Try new things. Take it slow. Take each other to Paradice and back. Then when you are back to the reality of life you can glance at eath other with a knowing grin in rememberence of your passion. Then remember sex doesn't start in the bedroom. Sometimes it starts when you do the dishes, take out the trashed (without being asked) Then give her a kiss on her neck, and she will fall into bed longing for you more than for the sleep she needs.
2006-07-05 19:03:15 · answer #7 · answered by clcalifornia 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hopefully, it is just a phase. This is why older people are always trying to stress to young people to take their time in getting married.....date......have fun....be single.....etc. The sad thing is that everything you are saying about your wife alot of men would envy. If you stray...how will you feel if you lose her forever and might not possibly find such a great wife again? That is the really important question.....then you will have all the freedom in the world to be with other women. Besides, when it gets down to it....doesn't the same thing happen with whoever you're with..........orgasm??!!
2006-07-07 17:09:13 · answer #8 · answered by Geez Louise 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Lots of people go through that. Your just bored, even though you know you've got it good. You don't need to get divorced. You need to find ways of spicing things back up, making things seem new again. Maybe you should ask your wife if there's anything she'd like to change, and think about what you'd like to change. But do not change wives. You know you have a great wife, and I think you know you'd be a fool to mess up a great relationship. Like I said, just change little things. Try new things in bed, maybe that'll surprise her and she'll want to add some new things to the list too. Start small, no big changes, or you really could mess things up.
2006-07-06 10:43:11 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just because one is on a diet, doesn't mean they can't LOOK at the menu. Lookings fine friend. But don't touch. You already said you're married to a good woman. Sounds to me like you want the comfort a good wife brings, but you also want the sex from others. This is greedy and selfish. Find a way of putting some spark into what you got. You know it makes sense.
2006-06-24 10:10:01 · answer #10 · answered by robert120513 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When you say your eyes tend to wander and you do not want to be with her then that means that you do not feel completely whole with her; so you should definitely get a divorce and not have her thinking that you are being completely and totally faithful. It may just as well be that you did get married at a young age and that she was the one that you wanted to spend the rest of your life with at that time, but now you do. Its life it happens. Let her go.
2006-07-06 14:47:46 · answer #11 · answered by ♫†☼☼♥Natasha♥☼☼†♫ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋