questions about sexuality in marriage...?

Question

i am engaged and have never kissed my fiance. we have been together trough middle and high school. we are now going to the same collage. we are both studying to become ministers and missionaries. i am just very worried. i will not have my first kiss until my wedding day ect. i love my fiance and desire him i am just worried that i will be too overwhelmed to do it that night. i am not a very shy person i am just extremely religious. does sex just happen naturally or is it nerve wracking at first.

*i would appreciate it when you are answering the question you are respectful*

i so love my husband but i guess that you could say that this physical intimacy thing is new to us. both of us. what should i expect?

*thank you very much for your answers, i really appreciate it*

Answer 1

I would imagine that it is going to be very difficult for you both, not so much phisically, but emotionally and psychologically.

Chances are that you will never have a normal, enjoyable or healthy sex life if you have stigmatized sex, and yourself to this degree. Do a google search for vaginismus.

I would ALSO be VERY concerned that your boyfriend is a closeted homosexual - strait guys of all religious stripes are much more intrested in sex than this.

Answer 2

I think that is great. Just remember that you don't have to have sex that night and a lot of couples don't. They are too tired and there is a huge relief that the wedding is over. If you feel uncomfortable when it is time to have the first lovemaking session, then tell your new husband to slow down. You will have a lifetime to do that.

The first time you have sex it will be awkward and nerve wracking because there is an expectation of being good. Trust me sex is always good when it is with someone that you love.

Answer 3

Many, many women experienced courtship and marriage just as you have in times past -- many still do, in cultures where marriage is arranged and the bride and groom may not even MEET until their wedding day! So you are not alone.

Remember to take it slow -- it can take years to develop a mutually satisfying sex life. It may be difficult, even confusing, at first. Talk to each other and be patient. If you can find a way to make it a journey, rather than putting all the pressure on one night, you might find that learning together is fun!

Answer 4

Hi and thanks for your answer to my question, Well love, sex and relationship go hand in hand, infact i am a bit suprised that u guys have still not kissed, kiss is fist touching and intimate gesture. I dont think anyone ever forgets their first kiss.
Personally i feel u should not wait till that eventful night.
One of you will have to take the lead, and from what i have experienced, sex just happens naturally and we all have our own learning and experience curve or cycle.
Afterall in life whats more important than sex is mutual understanding, love and respect for eachother concentrate on it and the rest will automatically fall in place.

Answer 5

Wow! That's got to be tough. Well, I think that since you have waited so long to even kiss, it will probably be wierd at first, but if you guys love eachother and want to become closer physically, you will easily get past all that. Not to be rude, but expect the first time to not be so great. It will probably be quick, since it's his first time. And it will be uncomfortable for you. Give it a few times, and you will both enjoy it a lot more. And then have fun!

Answer 6

Go to your local bookstore (or Amazon.com) and pick up a copy of "The Joy of Sex" as a wedding gift to you and your husband.

You'll be glad you did...

Answer 7

You won't have to worry about it, you both will be fine. Things will happen naturally.