Straights going to gay bars?

Question

Am I the only person who thinks its wrong for straights to be allowed to go to gay clubs? I mean it IS place for the gay community to hang out and what not so why is it ok for straight people to go there just for ''fun'' I mean at a gay club, you should be able to go up to anyone and hit on them knowing that theyre gay. I just think its a little disrespectful. And you?

Answer 1

Good luck on that one.

Answer 2

What I find really funny is that no one seems to have answered the actual point of your question and the part that seems to really bother you. It's NOT that straights are "allowed" into the gay bars, it's that you're upset that when you find one of them attractive that you can't hit of them and expect to be "successful".

After all, you state: "I mean at a gay club, you should be able to go up to anyone and hit on them knowing that theyre gay."

Guess what, there have ALWAYS been straights in gay bars -- and vice versa. It's only if the straights who are in there are rude, crude, and obnoxious that it's a problem. Guess what though, I've been in gay bars since the early 70's (yup, I'm gay) and lots of my non-gay male friends have visited, had fun, and GASP, even danced with me on occasion. The biggest "problem" I've ever had with them being there is that some of them are stunningly attractive and they sometimes get more attention from the guy I'm cruising than I do. :-)

Also, did you even consider that even if you do "hit on them knowing that theyre gay.", that there is about a 50-50 chance that they won't be interested in you anyway? So relax, enjoy - and if you can't actually tell who's straight, who's gay, who's bi, or who's interested in the teddy bear nightie, then who cares? Just enjoy the people there -- 'cause, guess what? That's what they ARE.

The only good thing I truly find in this question and in the answers is that it can actually be posted on Yahoo and openly. That PROOVES that what we've done as a community in the past 40 years HAS made a difference and it's made such a one that you can barely imagine the idea that at one time, you would have likely been arrested, jailed, and maybe worse for even discussing the subject in public.

Answer 3

No I don't. First off, what if the straight person is there with his gay friend? What if he was invited? If a straight man is there, he needs to be comfortable enough to tell someone "I am straight" if someone does hit on him. In my experience, the gay community has been very accepting of this when my self and my gay friends go out. They are like, ok lets have a drink and then thats about it. Many friendships that I know have been formed this way. Gay bars are usually less crowded than straight bars and the atmosphere is much more relaxing.

Answer 4

Leann B, I hear where you are coming from. You are right to expect that you as a gay person can go to an environment where you can relax, be yourself, and feel safe. So you should. I agree that people who are not tolerant or supportive of the lifestyle should not go to make trouble, fun, or for any other reason. Why then would you exclude people who are supportive and not there to gawk?

I am not gay, but many of my best friends from childhood, high school, and my adult life are or were (some have passed on). We'd often go together when I was back in town. Now, that first experience was an eye-opener, yet I still had a lot of fun. (In fact, my introduction was by the brother of one of my oldest and best friends. We're still mourning his loss from the Saturday before Easter.) Thereafter, I was very relaxed. My only experiences of being "hit on" by other women came about through my casino job here in Las Vegas, and not in a club.

Also, I have no reluctance taking my gay friends with me to otherwise "straight" clubs (for lack of a better word). Besides, I love the music!

Answer 5

I used to own a very large Gay club in Washington, DC...the most popular club in town. On any one night, I would guesstimate that 15-20% of the crowd was gay. IT was funny at the door...the straight guys would come in with their wives, be very worried about how to handle the come-ons from my patrons...I would tell them that a polite "not interested" would suffice. Within a hour or so, the same men would come back to the door and ask, "what's wrong with me?..No one has even looked at me." To say the least, there were lots of laughs. Clubs are fun, certainly more fun than straight bars. Who wouldn't want to come and enjoy. ??? I am sure that, on any given night, no matter how many girls you hit on, you are going to get a few "Not Interested" answers regardless of straight or gay...so what IS the problem here?

Answer 6

Bars and clubs can cater to one group over another but rarely do they classify themselves as an X or Y place- to my knowledge, anyways.

I think it's cool that straight folk go to a gay bar. Shows they are open minded and not bothered by the fact that there are two men/women kissing in the corner or danicing together on the floor. Someone offended by that wouldnt be in there to begin with, would he?

Some folk want to experiment... some folk want to see if they attract the same gender...some folk are bi and not necessarily gay. Some folk just dont like folks to hit on them....

I think that with all the work the gay community has done to be accepted, it's counter-productive to want to segregate themsselves further...

Answer 7

I think you're one of the few who'd have a problem with it. I go to regular clubs and bars all the time, and my friends go with me to gay bars. A bar is a bar, most of the places we go, they just let ppl know that they are straight, and it's a done deal. I don't go to bars or clubs to pick anyone up anyway, but why should it matter? In a way, this was a racist statement. Next should they have straight only restaurants?

Answer 8

Firstly Gays go to straight bars as well. The straight guys who go to Gay bars are smart, because they know they won't get into a fist fight unless they start it, they have the best party; as we know gays can throw a damn good party and the straight guys also know that straight women go to Gay bars to get away from the sleazy hetro. But to call it wrong for straights to go to Gay bars is being disrespectful to the gay/straight communities, and is like segregation and is detrimental to the gay communities being viewed by the straight community

Answer 9

Well, it's not really disrespectful unless the straight person is in the gay bar preaching or lecturing on how being gay is wrong, then that is totally like a violation

Answer 10

Wow, I had no idea anyone felt that way. My husband, and our friends went to a gay club one evening and felt nothing but welcome from everyone. We did our thing they did theirs. We enjoyed the DJ and the groovy dancing. When my husband was hit on by a guy he just politely declined. It's not like he was appalled, we were in a gay bar for goodness sakes, it's going to happen.

Wow, this wreaks of reverse discrimination to me though. Do you want to start posting at the front of all clubs - No Gays Allowed! or - No Straights Allowed! - or for people like me who are bi-sexual --- No Gays or Straights Allowed!

Next we'll be going back to -- No coloreds allowed!

Answer 11

There is nothing wrong with straight people going to gay bars, as long as they are ok with the enviroment then why not? Clubs are ment to be fun, and alot of the gay bars are good places to dance regardless of your sexuality.