when I had our son I was only 17. He left me for another girl who he satyed with for 2yrs. A month ago, he came to my town and said he was in the middle of a break up with his girl and wants to get back with me. I still have a soft spot for him but I fear he may dump me again or make me pregnant and leave. Our tradition says that he has to pay my parents for the damages, making me pregnant, of which he hasn't yet paid. I expected him to be more serious eg ask for marriage or pay for the dmage he did. My mum told me that he is just playing with me and if i give in he will play me and leave me. What should I do?
2006-06-24 07:16:08 · 11 answers · asked by Miss M 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Listen to your "mum"! She has your best interest at heart.
2006-06-24 07:23:44 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get a sign of good faith he either needs to pay for the damage and resume child support. If he can't do that then he isn't mature enough for you anyway. And just say no! I am sure you have grown up alot since the baby and things are great so don't make a mistake and mess things up with your parents. Because they are always there when you need them and I forgot where was he when you need help?! See family first!! Make sure what ever you do you have your parents approval.
2006-06-24 07:25:44 · answer #2 · answered by misty a 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I do not know what your tradition is all about, but I would just forget about that & hope that he will want to be in your son's life. I would not take him back. It sounds like he is on the rebound, and so he came crawling back to you. He would probably hurt you again, but you know the old saying..."if it is meant to be then it will be" I would at least not give him any booty for awhile...till he shows you that he's serious that way you will not have to worry about getting pregnant again.
2006-06-24 07:27:46 · answer #3 · answered by jess 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
first, he cannot make you pregnant unless you want to be. I would not rush into being with him, i think your mom is right. He is in the middle of a break up? How is that? either he left her or not, it's not like a divorce. Anyway it is possible for him to be a dad with out being your man. Bouncing from woman to woman is not a good sign...... I love how he had to pay for damage her did to you, god i would be soo rich!
2006-06-24 07:25:28 · answer #4 · answered by tall_slimm 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dont take him back, forget abou the payment and moved on. It only natural you will still have a soft spot for him. If you take him back he may end up hurting you again, and the words if i had known will be too late. Its your call good luck sis!
2006-06-24 07:21:27 · answer #5 · answered by slimchick 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your mum is right,she a smart woman. He's probably just trying to find a new place to live without having to pay for anything and when he finds a new victim he'll just leave you again.
2006-06-24 07:27:49 · answer #6 · answered by unicornfarie1 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
be careful. he just wants something from you. if you still love him and want him to prove you that he does, test him. make him suffer the way you did when he left you. it was ridiculously wrong of him to leave you with his son to another girl. remember, good things are usually too good to be true.
2006-06-24 07:27:51 · answer #7 · answered by 27stars 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think it's only natural to have a soft spot for him, he is the father of your child, however, i am not too sure i would trust him again....just remember actions speak louder than words, watch his actions to gain insight to how he really feels about you and his child. remember you also have a little one to consider in your decisions. i certainly would not be readily available to him, he wasn't to you when you needed him, was he? he needs to prove to you, not you to him.....good luck and use your head, not your heart.
2006-06-24 07:29:05 · answer #8 · answered by sara 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Be very careful, you dont want an unstable father for your son
2006-06-24 07:26:07 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
dont let him come back and where you from hawaii whats your culture
2006-06-24 07:24:47 · answer #10 · answered by lequanm 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋