I'm 9 weeks pregnant, and I don't want an abortion but my bf wants me to have one.?

Question

We won't do an abortion past 12 weeks so I have 2 weeks and 6 days, how long does it take to get an app for an abortion on average, we live in ny

The problem is I'm only 19 yrs old, he's 27 but he thinks if I have this baby he will be a loser forever and that I won't be able to go to college because all social programs offer daycare run by ex crack addicts and that id be a bad mother to do that to my baby.

Answer 1

Do not MURDER your BABY for anyone. That is your child and you should not have to be talked into killing it. Dump him and have your baby or make him realize that abortion is murder.

Answer 2

I was 17 when I got pregnant with my son. My 18 year old b/f didnt take it too well. He asked me to have an abortion at first. I simply told him that I was going to raise this baby and if he didn't want to be a part of it then fine but I was not going to abort the baby. My bf never abandoned me and stuck by me through the whole thing. Our son is 4 now, we are married and are pregnant again. He always said he made the biggest mistake by wanting me to have an abortion because our son was the best thing to ever happen to him. He was just scared as hell at becoming a parent so young. If you really dont want an abortion then don't get one. If he insists or will leave you b/c of it..then you're better off without him. It was hard being so young with a baby but we figured it out. I am 22 now and I've never let being a mother stop me from anything. I just graduated from college with my bachelors (right on time), I've worked and still managed to keep friends. My son has been one of the best things to happen even though I wasnt ready for him..I wouldn't change a thing. But it's up to you. You have to decide if it's something you can handle.

Answer 3

You make that choice. My bf wanted me to get a abortion when I found out that I was pregnant. I got rid of him instead it was the best deciosion that I made. About college there are qualified daycares that can take care of your baby. Try a family member first to see how that works. I now have a beautiful 3 month baby girl I adore her so much. If I would of listen to my bf I would not have my baby right now. After I had her I really learned what uncondiotional means. I know that if you have your baby you would have the same feelings. As your bf goes he needs to go away because he is not supporting you when you mostly need him. Let me tell you he wont change. If you decide to get the abortion you would never know what would happen to your baby or see what you have created. What ever you decide I hope that you make the right decision. TAke care and good luck!

Answer 4

This is a decision that is totally up to you. If you don't want to have the abortion he can't make you legally or otherwise. Life might be hard for you raising a baby alone, but if you do it just because he wants you to you will regret it. The relationship will most likely be over either way you decide so I wouldn't figure that into the equasion. If you decide to have one, ask the clinic about donating the fetus for stem cell research, this is an option some clinics offer but cannot tell you about due to legal reasons. Knowing that it was not a wasted life and was used to help others may help you deal with the emotional issues better. I had a friend who did this in MD and she said she thought it was a good idea. Good Luck!!!

Answer 5

I had an abortion when I was 22. I have regreted it ever since. That child would be almost 16 now. If you had an ultrasound at this point you would hear and see the babies heart beating. There is a precious little life growing inside you honey. There are so many couples out there longing for a baby to love, consider adoption. This is you're body, you're bf has no say in what you do, even if he is the father. Trust me at this point he just does not understand. I'll be thinking of you and will say a prayer for you.

Answer 6

Don't listen to these idiots that are claiming abortion is murder.... a lump of cells is not yet a human being, it can't survive on it's own...and it's not illegal to have an abortion.. I say do what you want and not what anyone else wants. I was in a similar situation when I was 19 and the guy was 29. I was so naive that I didn't understand the risks. I ended up aborting the pregnancy and I have never regretted it. I have 14 year old boy/ girl twins and a new baby due Feb 5, 2007..... I love my kids because I was ready for them.......

Answer 7

Ask your self a few questions.

Where do you see your life going with a baby, and with out a baby? Do you want to be connected to this "Boyfriend" for the rest of your life? Do you think you will be able to emotionally and mentally handle a child or an abortion? The choice is yours to make. If you want an abortion, it takes no time at all to get an appointment, but it will cost around $500, which is alot less than a lifetime of paying for a child you don't want to have, or the anguish of giving up for adoption.

My answer may sound harsh, and many people are against abortion, but I think it is ok, if you are ok with it yourself. Why bring unwanted children into this world. Don't let people guilt you into having a child if you can not provide for it, emotionally, physically, and financially, as a single woman. And don't fool yourself into thinking it will be so easy to give up for adoption.

Dont be surprised if you have the child, if the "father" slacks off or backs out of your relationship. And don't count on him to support the child, because he can be a dead beat.

What ever you decide to do, the decision has to be right for you, and unfortunately your "boyfriend", but most of all you.

Good luck, and don't wait too long to make a decision

Answer 8

I am not from NY so I do not know how long it generally takes to apply for an abortion.

Anyways, if you do not want an abortion, then think about it pretty well. You cannot have one just because your boyfriend said you should. It is your child, you are your baby's mother. You have the right to choose what to do with your baby as much as your boyfriend does. If you cannot meet eye to eye on this decision, decide on your own. Do what you feel like doing because in the end, you are the one who is going to do it or not.

Answer 9

First of all, dont do it if you dont want to. Its your body..your baby.If you do it soely for his sake you will regret it and you will resent him anyways. Having a baby is an amazing experience. Family life is intensely rewarding and in fact may be the only thing in life that is actually worth pursuing. Everything else will eventually rust or fall down or fade from memory, but your family will still be there after you have gone. Your family and friends will provide support. I think that at his age he will learn to accept and like the idea of being a dad, my husband was the same. He was freaked when I became pregnant. He wanted me to have an abortion or give it up for adoption, and I couldnt bring myself to do either. Now we are parents of a beautiful 3 month old baby girl and he loves being a dad. I think he will come around. Give him time and communicate lots, dont beat around the bush. Tell him exactly how you feel about it. Good luck~ PS this link was very helpful for me.

Answer 10

For all purposes you are right NOW a mother. If you don't want to terminate the life of your baby, than as it's mother, you must fight tooth and nail to protect it.

Do not think for a moment that this 'basic procedure' will not effect in some way the rest of your life. Do you think even 1 year from now this boyfriend will still be in your life? Or will you be left holding the guilt bag for ever more while he has moved on?

If keeping the baby is not in it's best interest then there are thousands and thousands of great parents desperate to adopt a baby in need.

Be a mature, responsible Mother and do what's right for this child you are growing. It's counting on you.

Answer 11

I just went through the same thing and I did have the abortion because I'm 19 and I already have a daughter with someone else who is going to be 2 next month. I would have had the baby if he would have been supportive but my daughter's father is not there for me or her and I didn't want to have to try and raise 2 kids alone. I didn't think it was fair. I went to the clinic and I called my boyfriend bawling but he talked me through it and I'm still with him. I think it was a good thing I guess he is only 18 and not mature... he has also made it very clear he doesn't want kids anytime soon and he isn't very good with them. I guess it was for the best but ultimatly it's your decision I have a daughter by myself right now and I'm doing great and I thank God that I chose to have that one!

P.S.- It took me about 2 weeks to get an appt so you need to decide NOW.