It is known that the percentage of divorce in this country is very high. How did u feel after ui got dovorced?

Question

People divorce because they can't live with each other. Sometimes, at the expense of the stability of their children.I am curious how many of those who divorced can say they were right in making that choice, that they have never been as happy, after they left their spouse. What joy did you experience, or what other problems did you encounter as a result of divorcing? Was it a good decision. Was there a time in your life when you felt sorry you decided to divorce? Would you recommend this to anyone who may be in the same situation as yours? Given the chance to turn back the hands of time, would you have the humility to try andmake the marriage work, as long as there is no abuse and those hurtful emotional punishment?

Answer 1

My divorce was my decision, and a selfish one at that. It was painful to go through, painful to watch my husband go through, and the kids......well I protected them and buffered most of it. They were really little and used to their dad not being home much......he worked crazy nighttime hours with long shifts. Given the chance to turn back time? That's tough. I guess it depends how far back. I married someone who was not a good match for me, because I was too young to make a good decision. BUT....he was a good husband and brought me two beautiful children. What I wish is that I had waited to marry, I wish that if I had married that I had seen the problems coming earlier, I wish that I had understood committment before I married, and a plethora of other "wishes". I do not think my divorce was a good decision for anyone but myself.....therefore I dont' think it was a good decision. Had I stayed I probably would have had a long unhappy marriage, but perhaps I wouldn't have wrecked so many lives. I did try to make it work.......but I think it takes both people in order to do that. One working at it doesn't cut it. And I think there was a point of no return for me......a point at which I looked at my husband and didn't know who he was. I felt like this wasnt' someone who I had anything in common with. I had become someone else entirely and he had hardly changed at all in 10 years. So basically......I think I had no GOOD excuse for divorcing, but yet when I look back, I dont' know what else I could have done at that point to save my sanity. And yes, I regret all that it caused.

Here is the key to what the problem is today........when people get married they have no REAL understanding of what committment and marriage are about. The problem takes place BEFORE you decide to marry. Love is nice, but it is not what holds a marriage together. Love is only what starts the marriage. And unfortunatley alot of times, our parents dont' tell us what marriage is REALLY like before we take the step. Add that to today's society being extremely selfish, and you have the perfect recipe for divorce. If you understand what you're getting into before you get married, it's easier to know what to do during the marriage and how to hold it together. The social and economic pressures are greater today as well.

Answer 2

Yes there would be grounds for divorce if there were abuse in the situation,,MOST DEFINITELY.Other situations depend on both party's happiness,,if 1 person is not happy in the relationship then the other most definitely can not be happy either,,. I was in that situation n we did live together for 5 years before we got married. It still did not work,,all I can say is that I tried to make it work ,and I tried way to hard to make a angry, very unhappy man, happy,,in the process I lost whom I was and that was not a good thing. In other words you can loose ur own selfesteem trying to fix a broken partner, and I don't think that was part of the deal when I said I DO...that is a mistake that I will never have to redo ever again in my life,,I waited until I was 29 to get married n lost every thing about whom I am in that process,,,no longer,,,I know exactly whom I am n what I want,,,,,believe it or not MY DIVORCE WAS THE BEST MOVE I HAD EVER MADE,,,I now have every thing that I ever wanted and my true friends that were begining not to like the person that I had become,,are now my very best friends,,and give me props for going alll the way with my dreams and hopes in life...I have every thing I ever wanted(finally) after years of messing up and spending my money very un wisely,,,bought a house,went back to school,bought a business(the one that I wanted),am a better mother n I am a fiancee' to a wonderful man ,my kids have a great man to look up to for the first time in their lives,,,good luck to all of the people that are thinking about getting out of a terrible marriage ,,,,u can do it I PROMISE<<>

Answer 3

I, for one, am really happy I got divorced. It was my decision. I was so sick and tired of his lying, cheating, using/abusing drugs, abusing me, arguing with me about every little thing, not helping with anything, and on and on and on.

I feel soooooooooooo much happier and freer since we divorced. It was the best decision I ever made in my life. I am free to do what I want, when I want, with who I want without someone demanding to know what I am doing, when, etc. I don't have to work all day (8-12 hours) and then go home and do all of the housework while he sits and watches tv or goes to bed.

Since we divorced, I found someone that knows how to love, respect, and cherish me. He treats me like a God, keeping me on a pedestal, and I do the same with him. My ex didn't appreciate all the love I had to give him. Instead, he took all the love and trust away.

Would I do it with him again? No frickin way!! Put it this way: since we divorced, he has lost his home, car, job, and everything else and is living off of daddy. I, on the other hand, am in a home I am buying and have a lot to be thankful for. My ex has gone downhill and I have gone uphill. Why would I want to be with someone like that again?

Answer 4

My marriage was a mistake. I knew her less than a year, but what I did know about her was a little confusing. There was fighting throughout our dating relationship and the marriage. I was engaged to her for a short while, then I got her pregnant. That sped up the ceremony almost a year. I love my son very much. But at the same time when I look back on it, if she was not pregnant with him we probably would have broke up and gone our separate ways. That marriage was not meant to be.

Answer 5

I'll just say the best decision I ever made in my life, for me, for my children, and everybody that ever knew me, was when I decided to get a divorce. I have been happy, never regretted it, and would do it agin tomorrow, if necessary. I lived in hell for 25 years, and will NEVER do that again! Life is good, fun, and wonderful when you divorce , if you have a marriage like I had. Good Luck!

Answer 6

I agree with what you are saying. People divorce because they are selfish. If there is physical danger involved, that is one reason to separate. But people divorce over the very stupidest of things only resulting in completely hurting their children. My husband is a child of divorced parents and as a result, he has no respect or like for either of them.

Answer 7

I AM GLAD I DIVORCED MY EX.I HAVE ONLY ONE REGRET THAT IS THAT I DID NOT LEAVE SOONER.BECAUSE MY SON LEARNED SOME OF HIS BAD BEHAVIORS,LIKE SITTING THERE WATCHING A WOMAN CLEAN UP WITHOUT EVER HELPING.THINKING THAT ITS HER JOB EVEN WHEN SHE IS THE ONLY ONE WITH A JOB.
EATING ONLY MEAT AND FILLING UP ON IT WITHOUT THINKING THAT MAYBE SOMEONE ELSE MIGHT WANT A PIECE.ALL KINDS OF LITLE THINGS THAT HE DID THAT WAS INCONSIDERATE OF OTHERS NOW MY SON IS TAKING UP WHERE HE LEFT OFF.
WHEN I MARRIED I WANTED TO RAISE MY SON WITH HIS FATHER MORE THAN ANYTHING AND I PUT UP WITH SO MUCH ABUSE FOR YEARS THEN HE TURNED ON HIS OWN SON AND THAT WAS WHEN WE LEFT.EVEN THOUGH HE WAS ABUSED ALSO HE BLAMED ME BECAUSE HE DID NOT HAVE A DAD IN HIS LIFE. WELL NOW HE KNOWS.I LEFT BECAUSE I LOVED HIM TO MUCH TO LET HIM GO THROUGH ABUSE.BECAUSE HIS DAD IS NOW SERVING 7 YEARS FOR BEATING HIS 2ND WIFES SONS.NO ONE BELIEVED ME WHEN I SAID HE WAS DOING THAT TO US. SOME TIMES DIVORCE IS FREEDOM,SALVATION AND A LIFE SAVING TOOL THAT IM GLAD IT IS THERE...
I EXPERIENCED JOY,IT WAS LIKE BEING LET OUT OF A PRISON I NO LONGER HAD TO TAKE CARE OF MY TORMENTOR.I GAVE UP EVERYTHING I EVER WORKED FOR FOR OUR FREEDOM.IF I HAD TO DO IT AGAIN LIKE I SAID I WOULD HAVE DONE IT SOONER

Answer 8

Exit! Anyway thnx for 2 points.

Answer 9

if its not working out well its better to get seprate and if you later feel that that was a mistake leave some space to go back in relation mot marriage but can get togather.

Answer 10

Party, Party!!!!