The reason I ask is I have a situation where I reunited w/a freind from HS (he's male, I'm female). We haven't seen each other in 17 yrs. We had a crush on each other then but decided to be friends.
Well now, it's 17 yrs. later were both single and he wants me to fly out to see him, which is nice but, I'm still a little attracted to him(he dosen't know it). Sooo, I said I would get a hotel room, but he pleaded with me to stay the week with him instead and even told me to bring a bathing suit as we are gonna go to the beach & go swimming together on one of our outings.
My question is does this still seem like a "friendship" situation or does it sound fishy on his part?
Only honest answers please. :-)
2006-06-24 06:26:27 · 31 answers · asked by Q.S. 3 in Society & Culture ➔ Other - Society & Culture
Yes, men and women can have excellent non-romantic, non-sexual friendships. But since you haven't seen this guy in 17 years, I think you should get a hotel room. It'd be a lot less awkward to move OUT of the hotel and into his place, if you decide to, than it would be to have to leave his place at 2am and find a hotel if it worked out that way.
2006-06-24 06:30:15 · answer #1 · answered by Steve H 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How well do you know this person now? Do you feel that you still know him well enough to feel comfortable to stay at his place? If so, then why not stay there? It's cheaper than a hotel. If you think he is looking for more than just seeing an old friend, talk to him. Open and honest communication is so important in any relationship. If he is truly your friend, then he will respect that. If not, there is always the hotel.
I think that going swimming is a safe outing. I live a few miles from Lake Michigan and when friends come to visit, I always recommend going to the beach. It's one of the area's biggest attractions.
Just be safe and be honest. I think that you'll have a good time.
2006-06-24 13:40:56 · answer #2 · answered by Tom H 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The reason it is so difficult for men and women to be friends is because we are so different that many times we find it difficult to even relate to the opposite sex. When we find someone that we can actually be friends with, it peaks our sexual interest in them. It's a paradox that has confused and frustrated us for ages. Everyone says it's impossible to be just friends, and everyone who has a successful relationship usually states that their significant other is there best friend too. It sounds like he wants to bump uglies with you though girl and I think if you like him then you should. I agree with the person that said it will be easier to move out of the hotel and into his place than vice versa. Good luck!!!
2006-06-24 13:53:15 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know I think you might be reading to much into it. Fly out to see him and take it from there. If it happens to be that he wants you to fly out to see him because he is looking for more then you decide then if what he is offering is what you want. Live life your both single and who knows he might of been for you back in HS and the both of you were to blind to see it.
2006-06-24 13:42:33 · answer #4 · answered by DonTae C 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes men and women can be friends. friendship has to be the basis of any good relationship. since you can't determine his feelings until you talk with him, plan a hotel stay anyway and meet him for your outings. that will give you time to sort out how you feel and guage how he feels when you talk with him. if the feeling is mutual, you can always visit him again and stay at his house next time.
2006-06-24 13:44:34 · answer #5 · answered by loving 40+ 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes... both there's always interest on one or the other.. Friendship becomes too great and too important to spoil... Either you take it to the next level and prepare youself for the consequences.. Your friend wants to seduce you... men always want what they can't have.. it's power trip and an ego thing... Be careful... he's no friend...
2006-06-24 13:37:17 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get a hotel room if your in doubt about just "couching it" at his place! or staying in a guest room. As the old saying goes & still holds true today, "When in doubt, DON'T" ! I You can be forever friends, no matter what!
I hope this helps!
2006-06-24 15:01:01 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its not up to him ,. Its up to both of you . Whatever you want you do and whatever you don't want. you don't do. You sound as if you will give in to a mere suggestion. Remember this. Practice, and think about what you want. If you cant do what you want because of a weak will power, then don't go. I wish you strength, and joy. Good luck and much wisdom.
2006-06-24 13:33:36 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Could be either way. Just go to see him, take it slow, and see what happens. Of course, you'll want to make sure there is no significant other involved. But, I'm guessing you already knew that.
2006-06-24 13:31:19 · answer #9 · answered by The Apple Chick 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think men and women can be just friends.I think he just want you to stay with him cause you are spending money to fly to see him.By you staying with him,this will give you both a chance to catch up on old times.
2006-06-24 13:35:19 · answer #10 · answered by Poncho3040 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋