I am so sick and tired of people that blame there parents for everything that has ever happened to them, and their in their 30s. At some point don't we start making our own destiny by the decisions and actions that we take???Not everybody that had a traumatic experience in childhood becomes a serial killer or rapist, so why should we take that into account when these scumbags are trying to explain their actions??????
2006-06-23 18:40:08 · 12 answers · asked by simplyfabulous 4 in Social Science ➔ Sociology
I would say always!!
2006-06-23 18:43:01 · answer #1 · answered by allicinnamon 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Close. It certainly would be unfair to put that responsibility on a four year old, and it seems very reasonable to put that responsibility on a 30 year old. It is safe to assume that the point to which you refer lies somewhere in between.
However, to put an age label on it, such as one's 18th birthday as so many people do, is very unfair. That would assume that every 17 year old is the same, and that every 18 year old is the same, and that there is a serious change in everyone's life at midnight on the last day of their 17th year. It's much more realistic to assume that there are certain 14 year olds that are more mature than certain 25 year olds.
Rather, the point that one becomes responsible of their life is an undefineable step in maturity. Some people hit that maturity level at 15, and some people hit it at 20. I'd say the average range is 13-24, but that's just a guess. And since it is a maturity matter, it would be safe to assume that some people truly never take control of their own life, don't know any better, and maybe should never be held responsible.
But wait, there's more. You're asking the question from the point of view of the judge, and not the person being judged. You're asking "at what point in a person's life can I start placing that responsibility on the person?". (Now, I'm not putting words in your mouth here, I am just explaining how this difficult subject needs to be approached.) That would have to be a matter of opinion, and one that each person has to decide for himself. I suppose the best you can do is try to gauge the person's maturity level. Although, the other side applies to us as well. In a way, each step forward in maturity is a step one must choose to make, but it takes a certain maturity to take that step. Seems to me like a catch 22. How do we do it? Maybe because some maturity comes naturally, and that would induce one to take that step. Okay, i'm starting to confuse myself , so I think I'll just stop here.
2006-06-24 03:35:44 · answer #2 · answered by Brianman3 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When you are 18 you are on your own. You are not only an adult but you are free to make your own choices. The choices you make affect your life and only you are to blame if it sucks.
My dad walked out on us when I was 9 for another woman, I was sexually abused around the same time by two different people, and I grew up in a church that was almost like a cult.
I am 34 and have been happily married for 17 years, I have two wonderful kids and I love Jesus with all my heart. All of that because I chose the right things. I listened to God for direction in my life.
I could be whining about how crappy my childhood was and let it affect the way my life is now. But I CHOOSE not to.
Yes, childhood abuse can lead to extreme behaviors in adults but it's only because those adults allow it to. Those things should not be taken as excuses when they are trying to weasel out of their punishment.
I totally agree with you!
2006-06-24 01:51:36 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I dont blme my mom for the outcome of my life. I'm actually quite happy. I do however blame my mom for not taking care of her own responsibility. With that, I'm talking about my younger brother. I have 2 kids of my own and m mom will call me and ask me to buy my brother's medication because she doesn't have the money. When she says "doesn't have the money," she means that going on vacation is far more important than taking care of her disabled child. I don't blame her for my life because I've been on my own since 17 and have no problem with that. It turned out for the better for me. It just irritates me that she can't take care of HER child. My brother just turned 18, but like I said he's disabled and is unable to work. She hasn't taken care of him for the past 5 years. The only person who is getting cheated is my brother. I know he's considered an adult now, but I know if my children were disabled, I'd take care of them as long as I needed too!!!
I do however hate to hear people whine about what their parents did to them when they were children. For goodness sakes, there is a time to grow up and take care of your own actions at a point. I got pregnant when I was 17. Never once looked back and said that it was my parent's fault. I know it wasn't because I was living on my own. Well, livin with my boyfriend at the time(fiance now).
2006-06-24 01:50:18 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, our politicians here in Canada are great at that point-the-finger game. A group of native protesters come and take over a piece of land they think is theirs; what does our premier do? (A premier is similar to a governor of a U.S. state?). He blames the former premier, of course ... who has long since left politics and has moved on to other things.
When things are within our control, we need to make choices no matter what our parents did, our great-grandparents did or former premiers or prime ministers did. We need to look at the situation, analyze it and make the best choice that works for us and stop bitching about all these other people.
2006-06-24 03:54:21 · answer #5 · answered by Angela B 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wish everyone thought that way!!!
Things would be so much better. A lot less law suits driving up the cost of everything.
Like the lady that spilled coffee on herself as she drove away from the McDonalds window.
Or the Criminal who broke his leg running from the cops and sued because he wouldn't have broken it had the cops not chased him.
Thank GOD the people didn't win the McDonalds suit for making them fat.
The worse part of it is that our "Highly educated" Lawyers and Judges allow this to take place.
Sickening isn't it...
2006-06-24 09:38:58 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
At the point that they make a decision. A person is always responsible for their own condition in life when it involves decisions they themselves make. Acually taking responsibility for their own actions would involve them realizing this.
2006-06-24 09:50:08 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
1. THIS very MOMENT !
2. CLARITY in all funcional SUBTLE energy bodies in you viz., Mind, Intellect and Ego.
3. the connectivity with the Zest and Enthusiasm in you to do, execute and perfom what u decide to undertake.
4. the POWER to enjoy what you DO.
5. The Power to hold onto what you are doing RITE NOW till it provides you with a sense of FULL - FILLMENT.
6. feeling GREAT and FULL for THIS MOMENT for the GIFT it is in your Existance.
Gud Luck
just let me know if it worked for you. :)
2006-06-24 03:30:29 · answer #8 · answered by blessed_one_male 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When you start making your own decisions you must then be held accountable for your own actions.
2006-06-24 01:45:50 · answer #9 · answered by OU812 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yeah, this to disgusts me..
i personally feel that once you are out on your own or at an age where you should be out on your own..it's all on you.
2006-06-24 01:43:17 · answer #10 · answered by smokes_girl 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
when you turn 18!!!
2006-06-24 01:43:58 · answer #11 · answered by bunny 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋