and we dont have sex for like a week. this is really pissing me off and i told him what we can only have sex when your horny not me? what do i do or say?
2006-06-23 07:38:53 · 41 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
stop having sex at all. he goyya learn some lessons. no apologizing, no happy hours. and no offence, but only a deepshit do like this. man always gotta apologize, no matter if he's right, or wrong.
2006-06-23 07:44:27 · answer #1 · answered by denlun84 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Fights never produce anything good and has no winners. When you fight you both loose and it leaves a bad feeling between you for a long time afterwards. Responding in a fight will only add to an escalating yelling competition.
Find out together what you both enjoy the most about your relationship. What starts the "good things" in your marriage, and what stops those same "good things?" What starts "bad things" and what stops "bad things." It sounds really simple but it holds the key to controlling the experience you're both having.
You might benefit from reading "Don't Shoot the Dog" (actually not a dog-training book). But, on the subject of dogs (If a dog barks at you, don't try to out-bark him--you can't. Instead turn your back and keep doing so until he stops. When the barking has stopped for just 3-5 seconds, turn toward the dog and reward with an appropriate recognition). Warning: The method's
not directly transferable to husbands, and if not appropriately adapted to circumstances it could be perceived as patronizing.
Find and agree on a non -offensive "time out" handsignal that you can both agree to respect when things get too heated. After the hand signal wait to speak until one of you can say something positive about the other person in a sincere tone.
2006-06-23 08:55:31 · answer #2 · answered by ghost 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well here is some news for you and I am noyt trying to be mean but most men do not apologize nafter a fight that is just men being men. I have been married for 2 1/2 yyrs and last month was the first time ever that my husband ever apologizes to me but everytime we fight we make up and I know he is sorry he just has a ard time sayingit. He does little things to show me that he is sorry and thats what counts words aren't always everything. I don't know what to tell you about the sex I wish I could help you but my husband loves sex and we have it all the time.
2006-06-23 07:54:33 · answer #3 · answered by badtinky69 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can relate as I am in a similar situation. I have plenty of KY, so I suggest you get a toy or seek another husband :) I know it's not that easy, you all really need to have a sit down about this. My partners largest argument is that sex is #1 for me in a relationship. I would say a dam close second, but not #1! It is however very important, for some this is their way of expressing their love for their partner, as it is one avenue for me to do so. Talk, try to get on the same page and both try to make a cautious attempt to change things. Don't throw in the towel just yet!
2006-06-23 07:44:05 · answer #4 · answered by M D 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Withholding sex is a power play. It sounds like he may have control issues. The same goes for not apologizing. People with control issues have a really hard time admitting they were wrong. (I know because I am one of those people). Talk to him openly about how you are feeling. Don't resort to doing the same things back to him. It won't help. The issues are deeper than sex and maybe some couples therapy would be helpful.
2006-06-23 07:44:19 · answer #5 · answered by jonny'sgirl06 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's not apologizing because he doesn't think he's done anything wrong. So, in order to make his point, he's using sex as a tool to punish you. It's a control issue on his part and a pathetic one at that. Treat him the same way, next time he reaches for you after he's gotten over his little fit, just tell him no. Explain to him that you don't like his game. Then, the next time you argue, approach him for sex and remind him how immature he's acting.
2006-06-23 07:44:17 · answer #6 · answered by kathy059 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your husband is just a natural as#hole, hehehe. Accept it and love it. When you do that he will probably lighten up a little bit. Another thing that I hope is not doing is cheating, if this is happening often I would keep my eyes open. You have to really talk to him maybe plan a dinner out and talk over some wine. It can;t get ugly in a public place and it will allow the both of you to mind your manners, and stay calm. Good luck.
2006-06-23 07:45:48 · answer #7 · answered by nina_ross692000 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you should tell him what you just told us. Find a time when you are both in a good mood and ask him if he has some time to talk about something that's been bothering you or has been on your mind. In a positive and non-accusing way, express your feelings. Just remember if you use I messages and not you messages, it comes across better. What I mean by that is, try to explain it without saying what he does that pisses you off, tell him that "I feel sometimes like I ..>>...>>...dadadada whatever>>> " get it? Not like this "You always make me ....blah blah blazay squazay...blah!" It comes across better. Good luck!
2006-06-23 07:44:02 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The apology determines what your fighting about. Many don't apologize when they think their right. What you do is get to the root of why your fighting to start. See what causes the fighting and try to fix it.
When fighting affects your sex drive it's time to get to the root of your fighting. Lack of sex and its not as a result of medical conditions is a sign of trouble in the marriage and you need to get
to the root of your problems.
2006-06-23 07:46:20 · answer #9 · answered by words from the heart 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't want to scare you, but I would try doing my best to make sure he isn't cheating, I mean has he always been non sexual or is this recent? Most guys want it More than once a week, not to brag but me and my boyfriend have been together for two years and we basically have sex every day so if he suddenly didn't want to for a week I would be worried.
2006-06-23 07:45:10 · answer #10 · answered by Eve 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋