At the feeble age of 16 I met my soul mate...only at 16 I didn't know it and foolishly I broke his heart. Now I'm 21, married with a child and though I love my husband very much I feel as though I will forever regret breaking this one guys heart. I know this sounds childish, like some sort of high school girls unrequited love story; Truth be told sometimes I wonder if that's really what it is, but then I go back home for a weekend to see family, I pass him in the store (it's a small town) and I feel the awful pain of letting that one go. Not only did I lose his love, but I also lost his friendship. I'm happy with my husband and I wouldn't trade what we have, but I wish there was a way to tell the man who's heart I broke that I'm sorry and that my heart will forever hold a place for him. He won't speak to me and I'm not sure that even if he would I could get those words out of my mouth. I need some clever ideas on how to tell him and bring closure to this once and for all. Any ideas?
2006-06-23 05:30:29 · 7 answers · asked by lynzi_n_bridges 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Truth be told, I do not think these feelings your having are in response to a love you lost. I personally think that you are 21, married, with a baby, and feel trapped. You are so young. You have undoubtedly had to grow up fast, become a wife, and mother. Take your energies and redevote them to your husband and daughter. You married that man for a reason. We all have loved, lost and hurt someone sometime in our life. Forgive yourself for what you did to this man, and move on. He obviously has moved on too.
2006-06-23 05:45:02 · answer #1 · answered by adjoadjo 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Please be careful.
I too met my soul-mate at 16 and she too broke my heart at 21. We both went our own ways and had no contact for 25 years although a day didn't go by without me thinking about her and why we broke apart.
Then I got a card from her asking if I wanted to "just talk". We were both married to other people and had children and had been for 20+ years. It soon became VERY apparent that we were still deeply in love and that the bond had stretched but never broken. We didn't know what to do. The next few years were pure hell. We each divorced and last July we were married. My soul is finally at peace but so many were hurt in the process.
You must look within yourself and try to determine whether it's really "closure" you are after or are you reopening a door? Think about what would happen if he actively pursues getting you back?
Again. Be careful.
2006-06-23 05:45:03 · answer #2 · answered by lunatic 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
if he was your soul mate you guys would find a way to be together. the fact is you broke his heart and obviously you had some reason to hurt him or leave him. maybe you werent as happy with him as you think you are now. i think everyone has a soft spot for their first love or their first serious boyfriend and even though you have a new life now you are always going to care about him and wonder how he is. but the truth is things turned out the way they did for a reason. i would say you should write him a letter telling him that youre sorry for the pain you caused him, or maybe an email if you have his email address.
2006-06-23 05:37:49 · answer #3 · answered by Hez 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think we all have this story.
If you truly feel you need to speak with him, you should try. You say you saw him recently, did you try to speak with him? You say he won't talk to you, do you know that for a fact or are you just assuming it from five years ago?
If you try to speak with him and he won't, you are absolved.
However, that being said, I think that your best bet is to just let this go. Everyone has someone that broke their heart, but most of us can move on especially after five years. I doubt that this boy is crying himself to sleep every night because you dumped him. I can pretty much guarantee he has moved on with his life and doesn't need your apology.
edit: what I mean is, you should realize that this apology you are so interested in giving is really a way for YOU to get closure. This isn't to apologize or make things right because you have no clue if it needs righting. Likely this boy has taken whatever steps he needed to get closure. Apologizing will make YOU feel better but you have no idea what he really needs.
edit again: also, realize that the soulmate thing is a lie and is a culturally implanted fixation from movies and television. There is no "right person" there is the "right personality". He isn't your soulmate, he is just some boy who probably hasn't thought about you in years.
2006-06-23 05:36:38 · answer #4 · answered by QuestionWyrm 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have had that problem myself. Try writing him a letter explaining just what you feel and why you hurt him. It helps even if doesn't he read it, but I would be careful cause you don't want your husband to think your wanting to leave him for this other guy.
My husband still asks me if I am sure I don't want the other guy back. So what ever you decide to do be aware of your husband's feelings
2006-06-23 05:42:08 · answer #5 · answered by cheley1129 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are in the store bump into him without him knowing it is you. Then if he says sorry or excuse me try starting a conversation with him. Just try to talk to him. Let him know by your actions that you are sorry.
2006-06-23 05:36:01 · answer #6 · answered by maeghan 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
1 word: myspace.
you could possibly find him on there, and drop him the message. i know its kind of impersonal, but what needs to be done...
2006-06-23 05:34:08 · answer #7 · answered by jen 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋