i have been with my bf for 4 years now and im 36 im ready to start thinkin about the future and who im goin to spend it with,i would like to marry the man im with ,but there is a problem he is already married to someone else,we are always arguing about it him being married still i feel like if he dont want to be with her and hasnt been with her in along time and there child is a grown woman now why dont he divorce her ,its starting to make me feel like maybe he dont want to marry me and thats why he wont divorce her because he is afraid ill want to get married, i just dont want to keep wasting years if he has no intentions of marring me but i dont no what to do anymore when i mention it to him he says when the time is right he will divorce her but i think we been together long enough to no what it is we want ,if he has no intentions of ever marring me i think its time for me to move on or am i being to pushy,he dont even have to marry me right away but atleast get the divorce
2006-06-23 05:19:15 · 10 answers · asked by chell 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I'm sorry.. but to tell you the truth, your bf will never divorce his wife for the sake of you. People above me will definately said nasty and sluty remarks about you for falling in love with a married man, but I won't and yet quite sympathy about you for being so passionate with your bf who doesn't value & treasure you.
If your bf is truly wants to be together despite he is already married, I would say he will proposed to you and make you as his 2nd wives. But he doesn't seem to have come across in his mind. Alternative, he would suggest to take a wedding photos and go for honeymoon marriage and I believe you would comfortable with such arrangement. At least he is answerable to you.
Have a final talk with your bf and if he can't reply you on the suggestions, I am strongly urge you to move on your life without clinging on such irresponsible man.
2006-06-23 06:19:51 · answer #1 · answered by Adorable Mrs 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You answered your own question... you are right, he won't divorce his wife because is not worth the hassle knowing that he already has you eating out of the palm of his hand, and that if he does, you will expect him to marry you.
How confortable can you make his life? He has to put no effort into the relationship, and honest, you know that he has NO intentions to get divorced.
At 36 honey, you deserve to be a bride, time is running out and is been 4 years too long. I say, give him an ultimatum, if he doesn't want to get divorced, then move on..... you don't want to be 40 and still waiting do you? Every day that you let go by, the slimmer the chances of gettting what you want.
Good luck
2006-06-23 12:28:17 · answer #2 · answered by Blunt 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your are dating a married man then it all should be clear. If it has been 4 years and he has not divorced he is not intending to do so. Secondly if he is having a fling with you more than likely he will have the same behaviors again and again. You deserve better. There are plenty of unattached men out there. You need to raise your self-esteem and dump him. And find someone who is truly deserving of your time and attention.
2006-06-23 12:37:36 · answer #3 · answered by notshy84 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My boy cousin got with a married women..she devorced her husband and got with him. Three years later she left him and ran of with an other man after having 2 kids together. If he is doing that to his wife, 85% of chance he will do it to you. If he wanted to devorce her he would had done it 3 years ago. You say they dont do nothign but its his wife just the fact of knowing that my man is kissing someother girl would drive crazy. I know its sad to hear, but you should really let go and find someone single that will respect you and himself.
2006-06-23 12:43:55 · answer #4 · answered by yeah yeah 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
.Hello... if he is cheating on his wife, what is he going to do if you marry him. Can you ever really trust him. I think anyone who cheats on there spouse for any reason, is a huge looser. If he is unhappy in his marriage, he should Get a divorce not cheat. If he really wanted to be with you ...he would. He's just not that into you. Please have some respect for yourself you should realize you are way to good for him.Maybe you sould get some counseling I think you may have some self esteem issues. good luck and love yourself
2006-06-23 15:23:36 · answer #5 · answered by Heidi C 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He doesn't want to get divorced because he really loves you stayed around for 4 years he just know you will always be there so leave girl he ain't worth it because if he will cheat on her he will do it to you once a cheater always a cheater and if he really dose love you once you walk he will follow just leave girl because your probable better off with out him anyway.
2006-06-23 12:33:22 · answer #6 · answered by mrs sexy cool 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He will never marry you. Get it through your head. You've wasted enough time. God! You REALLY need to move on. Don't waste any more.
2006-06-23 12:29:32 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
he won't marry you because he is with his wife and i would say , leave the relationship and move on. you are waisting your time and don;t wait for him there is guys out there and waiting for you. and leave this guy alone. end up with him and get over it. he won't marry you.
2006-06-23 13:19:43 · answer #8 · answered by **B** 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he is cheating on his wife, why would you marry him? Why are you even with him? If he doesn't respect her he won't respect you. It sounds like he is just using you for sex.
2006-06-23 12:24:41 · answer #9 · answered by on my way 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You answered your own question. Read back everything you wrote, there is your answer.
2006-06-23 12:26:25 · answer #10 · answered by truthbetold 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋