South Park 4.17 - A Very Crappy Christmas
Mr. Hankey:Boys, I want you to meet my wife. Autumn.
Autumn:Howdy-hey kids! [waves in the same way Mr. Hankey does, holds a martini in her left hand] Would you like a drink?
Mr. Hankey:They're too young to drink, honey.
Autumn:Hey haa, it's Christmas!
Mr. Hankey:Come. You have to meet the little nuggets, too. Kids! [they come one one by one] This is our son, Cornwallis.
Cornwallis:[wearing glasses, a scarf and little blue beret] Hoowwdy Ho! [hops aside as another nugget enters]
Mr. Hankey:Our daughter Amber.
Amber:[in pink dress and maroon bow] Hoowwdy Ho! [hops aside as another nugget enters]
Mr. Hankey:And our son, Simon.
Siimon:Eee, hey! Hnhn.
Mr. Hankey:[aside] Simon's not so smart. He was born with a peanut in his head.
Siimon:Heh What? Dad? Huh?
Mr. Hankey:Nothin', Simon.
Kyle:A family! So THAT's why you haven't been able to spread Christmas cheer.
Mr. Hankey:It sure has been tough. Nobody seems that into Christmas out there.
...
Kyle: [to the other three] You guys go tell Butters to start making the cutoouts. I'm gonna go tell Mr. Hankey the good news!
[The Hankey home, day, exterior. Mr. Hankey and Autumn are in a heated argument inside. The argument is incomprehensible for a while, until a voice stands out.]
Mr. Hankey: Now you put that vase down! Put that vase down! That's a very expensive vase! [now warning] Don't you throw that vase! [the vase is thrown and breaks.]
Kyle: [now facing the house from the sewer] Ah, Mr. Hankey?
Mr. Hankey: [exits the front door] Oh, Kyle! Hoowwddy ho!
Kyle: [excited] We got the money, Mr. Hankey. We're gonna make our animated Christmas card.
Oh, that's swell! Kids! [the nuggets come out] Christmas is back on! We've gotta all go get that old drive-in workin' again.
The Nuggets: Okay!
Autumn: That's not the only thing we gotta get workin' again, [pokes him] if you know what I mean...
Mr. Hankey: [concerned] Wha- why do you, why do you have to say things like that in front of people?
Kyle: Well, I've gotta go start our animation. We've only got two days. [turns and walks away...]
Mr. Hankey: Good luck, Kyle. And we'll have that projector workin'! Don't you worry! [Cornwallis sniffs at himself]
2006-06-23 03:45:31
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answer #1
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answered by Smiddy 5
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"Mr. Hankey, the Christmas Poo
Episode Number: 9 Season Num: 1 First Aired: Wednesday December 17, 1997
Mr. Garrison directs the children's school Christmas play and Kyle's mom protests Kyle's participation, particularly because he is Jewish. The other children find out that Kyle doesn't celebrate Christmas. When asked what he can do for the Christmas play that isn't related to Jesus, Kyle suggests that he can sing the "Mr. Hankey" song. He breaks into the song but is interrupted when he mentions "Christmas Poo". Later on the playground he tells everyone the story of Mr. Hankey. Left alone by the others, Kyle breaks into the song "The Lonely Jew on Christmas". At City Hall the citizens protest everything about Christmas. The mayor seeks a new icon for Christmas and Kyle suggests Mr. Hankey and his mother quickly takes him home. The mayor promises everyone a non-offensive Christmas.
Kyle's parents try to dissuade him from his belief in Mr. Hankey. While in the bathroom brushing his teeth, Kyle hears a call from the bowl, it's Mr. Hankey, who comes for a visit. Mr. Hankey jumps around the bathroom as he breaks into the song "Santa Claus is on His Way". When Kyle's parents look into the bathroom, all they see are the tracks Mr. Hankey has left behind and their son holding a piece of Poo in his hand. The town removes all the offensive Christmas paraphernalia as Kyle introduces his friends to Mr. Hankey, a piece of Poo in a shoe box. With the new law in place, Mr. Garrison searches for a new song for the Christmas play, Cartman suggests "Kyle's Mom's a *****" in D minor and he breaks into song. During the song Mr. Hankey is outraged at the lyrical content and launches himself at Cartman at the end. Everyone else sees a piece of Poo hitting Cartman in the face. Kyle is sent to see Mr. Mackey, who diagnoses him as having fecal-philia. Mr. Hankey makes another appearance, this time in Mr. Mackey's coffee cup. The boys bring Kyle to the mental hospital to have him committed as a "clinically depressed fecal-philiac on Prozac".
The Christmas play goes on as Kyle sits in the mental hospital singing "Dreidel, Dreidel, Dreidel". Before the kids start, Chef sings one of his songs. When the kids perform, they do so with the musical accompaniment of minimalist composer, Philip Glass. No one likes the performance and they begin to blame each other, resulting in a fight breaking out. Chef asks where Kyle is and Stan and Cartman tell them he was committed because of the Christmas Poo that Chef recognizes as being Mr. Hankey.
A live action commercial for the "Mr. Hankey Construction Set" airs before the regular commercials air.
When the children begin to believe in Mr. Hankey, he appears. Cartman goes home, drawing the line at talking Poo. Mr. Hankey gets the town's attention and gets his message across. He reappears with the town at the mental hospital where the whole town is gathered to sing "Mr. Hankey the Christmas Poo".
Merry Christmas Kenny, you didn't die in this episode, despite the numerous opportunities! "
2006-06-23 03:48:57
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answer #2
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answered by OneRunningMan 6
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