I have been married to a woman that I met when I was 20 and she was 35 and after 20 years, I’ve been thinking we’re overdue for a divorce.
I am generally a happy person and an optimist - my Wife, a negative person and a pessimist. For the first 10 years I ignored our differences and the 2nd 10 fought hard to hold our marriage together, but have now realize I was the only one fighting for it. I have suggested counseling numerous time... she refused, not wanting to 'tell strangers our problems'.
Is it wrong to need to be loved, desired and wanted from your Wife? It feels more like she tolerates me than loves me. Everything I do is an annoyance to her. I am a romantic - I want to hold her but when I come up from behind to hold her and kiss her neck, she shrugs me off like I am bothering her. I bought games that promote romantic discussion and foreplay. She either won't play them or does so half-heartedly. Our 'sex life' is about the same...
Feel free to comment on what you think
2006-06-22 23:01:44 · 11 answers · asked by anymouse.navy 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Get a divorce. Find someone who will appreciate and love you the way you appreciate and love them. Be happy in life.
2006-06-22 23:59:45 · answer #1 · answered by smurfette_au2000 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
You need to go to marriage counseling togeher. Just because she is negative and a pessamist is no reason for divorce here. Tell her to go to someone she is comfortable talking to for counseling . Basically let her find the counselor. If she is not comfortable with a counselor right now then you need to go to one for you so that you know better how to live and love her where she is at. Talk with her and see if she wants this marriage to work or not and if she does you need to see a marriage counselor but if she wants out then your only option is to let her go. Hope this helps some and i am here if you need to talk . It is not wrong at all to feel the need to be loved from your wife but right now for some reason she cannot give that love. Also have her get checked out medically and see if there may be a medical or psychological problem going on with your wife. She may need medication.
2006-06-23 03:53:37 · answer #2 · answered by Lady Hewitt 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to sit her down and tell her how you feel about things. Be open and honest with her. Maybe there are things bothering her she hasn't told you. You need to find out if this marriage can be fixed. Marriage is a two way street. It take two to make it and two to break it. But both need to want to make the marriage work, not just one.
2006-06-22 23:20:42 · answer #3 · answered by brighteyes62301 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She obviously isnt interested, or has a much lower sex drive than you. Maybe she isnt enjoying sex and needs to see a doctor, but with her privacy issues that may be difficult at best. Try to get her to talk with her gynecologist about sex, and go from there. Sex is very important, but it has to be equally important to both people. Good luck.
2006-06-22 23:09:40 · answer #4 · answered by imamazed 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My heart just hurts for you. It sounds like she doesn't even try. Get out of this marriage while you are still young enough to enjoy life, and i wish you all the best.
2006-06-22 23:11:06 · answer #5 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My Friend Marriage is a covinent before God, and if it got that far it is ment to be. Its up to you to make it work do something about your dislikes towards your wife confront her be sensitive and comforting to both of your differnces remind yourself constantly why you liked her to begin with.
2006-06-22 23:06:10 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
She sounds homely. Divorce is now common place because we have empowered women and they initiate 93% of them. However, it doe *not* bring women happiness. I dunno, dude, it willl bring much sadness and emotional disquiet and it will not help your chances of getting rich. If she's a nice girl and doesn't beat you then stick with it. If she's one of those who tries to look ugly just to annoy then join some yahoo groups and tell all the guys. That should shock her into action.
2006-06-22 23:15:12 · answer #7 · answered by smile4763 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
she sounds "blocked off". i think you should try a little harder to get to the root of the problem. tell her the truth about how you feel....just put it out there. tell her you can't save the marriage by yourself but you want to try, and you want her to do the same. i really suggest that you try EVERYTHING before resorting to divorce.
2006-06-22 23:06:49 · answer #8 · answered by origchick 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
1
2017-03-02 08:23:42 · answer #9 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
my question: what attracted you to her? Only you can answer.
overdue or not, is not a question. Marriage is not a can of soda with expiry and manufacturing dates.
2006-06-22 23:18:47 · answer #10 · answered by chasing rainbow 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋