where is the fine line between self-confidence and swagger?

Question

how can you tell when someone's crossed it?

Answer 1

I think one of the key products of self confidence is being aware

of your interactions with others and how you affect others. Truly

self confident people inherently produce an aura about

themselves that makes it easy and desirable to be around them;

indeed they often like to promote or nurture the same self

confidence in others.

Conversely, those who as you put it, "cross the line" are self

absorbed and either ignorant of the signals others give them that

they are difficult to be around, or, actually thrive on making others

feel inferior. Ironically, it is those in the latter example who claim

to be "self confident" who spend an inordinate amount of

time "justifying" their boorish behavior and claiming others are

jealous or loosers who will drag them down.

Good Luck

Jimmy

Answer 2

Several of your answerers have already nailed down some of the critical criteria distinguishing the one from the other. I'll try to elaborate a bit.

Self-confidence suggests someone who is secure and self-assured. There is no need of showy behaviour (like swagger) or boasting of perceived qualities or accomplishments. If anything, there is a tendency toward self-deprecating humour (as magistra linguae indicated) because a truly confident person is comfortable in his/her own skin and can thus laugh at his/her own foibles. Many of the most self-confident people I know are anything but ostentatious. Rather, they are quietly self-possessed and entirely at ease with who and what they are -- and are not.

The swaggering sort is a charlatan, of course. This is not dissimilar to a question you posed not long ago about the difference between bravery and bravado. Just as true courage requires no macho tough talk (which is invariably ALL talk and NO action), true self-confidence has no need of constantly focusing attention on itself through bragging and blustering. The person who swaggers is trying desperately to compensate for something he/she is entirely lacking in. It's actually quite pathetic and sad.

As to when someone has crossed the line from self-confidence to swagger, it's pretty easy to spot and usually has to do with the otherwise self-assured party feeling ill at ease for some reason and then feeling the need to overcompensate by coming on too strong. The result is either instant embarrassment and a return to form or a downward spiral from confidence to vanity and insecurity (a sure sign of the total loss of self-confidence if ever there was one). Not pretty.

Answer 3

Um, I'd like to point something out. A lot of people who "swagger" or take on that sort of persona can actually be quite insecure and have very little self confidence. Many arrogant folk are actually trying to compensate for a feeling of worthlessness. This behavior actually causes them to go further and further into low self esteem because so few people respond in a positive manner to arrogance.

Answer 4

I think self-confidence is something that others can see, and engenders the same feeling in those around you, whereas swagger or *********, as I think you mean to say, can put people off.

Another way to think of it is, confidence makes people take notice, and over confidence screams for attention.

Answer 5

Self-confidence is often accompanied by a sense of humor about oneself and one's world. The self-confidence assists individuals in achieving goals; the sense of humor helps give them a sense of perspective.

Swagger and arrogance occur when self-confidence loses its sense of perspective. Arrogant people rarely have a sense of humor. Of if they do, they only direct it against others, never at themselves.

In other words, the difference is due to the understanding (or lack thereof) that everyone, if the gifted, talented, handsome, and rich, can screw up, and that screwing up on occasion is ok as long as you continue to move forward.

Answer 6

swagger doesn't get the job done.usually swagger can be spotted because in an attempt to swagger everybody will dress up the swagger with lots of extra details in an attempt to confuse you.the extra details will end up tripping them.
self-confidence needs no extra details to build up the truth.

Answer 7

Self confidence is from a person who is complete in all respects. Crossing that limit is like fall from grace and lack of completeness.
Ramachandran V.

Answer 8

swagger: to walk with a proud or insolent air. self-confidence: confident in one-self or in ones own unaided powers. confidence proceed es the power of our own. swagger is an insulting, disrespectful conduct.

Answer 9

well i myself is confused on this.
but what i can tell u is that one always regret on his over
confidence.

seriously i always think the difference but I'm never able to solve this puzzle

self confidence gives rise to over confidence that is for sure

Answer 10

it lyers between the 5th and 6th beer