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my mom and step dad are fighting on there anniversity and its about my dad.. and my dad hates my step dad and so do i ....should i step up and say something or stay sitting bc if i say something my mom will take away everything i have..fone,tv,and computer and i live off them and i go outside..but other wise if i dont say something i live with sitting around and thinkin about my mom and step dad calling my dad a f**k face and well i just over heard them fighting and saying these things!... my dad is better then them any day!!... i wish i could live with him then living with my f**kin.. richish / sl*t mom and f**king critic step dad!!!!!!!!!!... plz help

2006-06-22 16:17:25 · 9 answers · asked by courtney 1 in Family & Relationships Other - Family & Relationships

9 answers

Courtney,

You are in a tough situation hon. I'm sorry for that. My divorce was hard on my daughter as well. My only advice for you is to seek some counseling. It's OK hon. You don't have all the answers, none of us do. Your mother and step dad have some issues that only they can resolve. Talking with a therapist may help you come to terms with the situation. When I separated from my first wife I was not in the position to take in my daughter. Your father might not be able to do so yet? Most states will let the child decide who they want to live with around the age of 15 or so. You can contact your states social service office, child protective services if need be. They will be able to provide better information. Talk with your father too about this and see what he has to say about it. Also look to other family members for help and advice, Aunts or Uncles that may want to take you in for awhile until your mother and step dad work out their problems. Good Luck Hon! Remember, none of this is your fault!!

2006-06-22 17:49:14 · answer #1 · answered by rj842cc 3 · 1 0

First off, let me say how sorry I am that you are in that situation. Hang in there, and don't take it to heart or else it will eat you up inside and make you very angry and bitter.

It sounds like the adults have some serious issues in their lives with a lot of anger.


Go outside, get some air and let them resolve the issues by themselves, how they feel about your dad has nothing to do with your feelings.

It's best to stay out of it, and at least your mom won't take away your belongings.

2006-06-22 23:23:18 · answer #2 · answered by jennifer b 2 · 0 0

I am sorry that you have to be in the middle of all of this. Many times parents and step-parents do not realize that the things they say are affecting other people. They are selfish in that matter and it is difficult to keep quiet about it. If you yell at them or are rude to them in any way even if you are not meaning to be you are sure to be punished and you know this. That's what always got me into trouble when I was younger (my mouth). The thing is if you do not say anything it is going to vent up and you are probably going to feel very guilty. So here is my suggestion:Be mature about it! You are obviously growing up and old enough to think rationally. You need to keep quiet when they are angry and mad because you do not what that anger turned towards you. I would wait till things are calmed down then go to your mother and explain the way you feel. Tell her that it bothers you to hear such things and ask her if she would try to leave your father out of arguments or at least not say vulgar thinks about him when you are in hearing range. This will give her no reason to punish you, and will probably make her feel like an idiot. Good luck

2006-06-22 23:23:53 · answer #3 · answered by Kay 3 · 0 0

If your mom is punishing you for not liking her husband then it may be a good idea to talk to your father about moving in with him. Not to mention that you are very miserable there.
They have no right to involve your father in thier marital problems. They have no right to punish you for them either.
You should also be able to talk to your mom open and honestly about anything whether it be your step dad or not.
What you are going through is borderline mental abuse.
You could also call children and youth if it is that bad. Tell them how you feel and that you want to move in with your father.
The court will consider your wishes.

2006-06-22 23:28:34 · answer #4 · answered by lovingfeathers 3 · 0 0

Honey, how old are you? In most states, at the age of 14, you can CHOOSE with whom you want to reside, regardless of a court ordered custodial agreement. As long as your father has the means to care for you and is in agreement to take responsibility for your care on a full time basis, most courts will honor your wishes, espeically if you inform them of the occurances in your home. Speak with your mother first, express to her that you would like to live with your father. If she denies this, speak to your father, ask him if he would be willing to file for custody so you can have your say before a judge. Speak to a counselor at school, he/she may be able to put you on the right road to obtaining legal residence with your father as well.

2006-06-22 23:25:20 · answer #5 · answered by adagia27 4 · 0 0

You should sit down with your mom alone and talk to her calmly. Tell her that you over hear their arguing and comments about your dad. Let her know how you feel about it. Let her know that it is disrespectful to you for her to be so open about her feelings with your father when you are around. I mean thier issues were not yours and you should not have to hear about them. Hope this info helps.

2006-06-22 23:23:54 · answer #6 · answered by adyafterday 2 · 0 0

If you feel thats strongly agindst your step dad then you should talk to your mom privately and if that dosent work talk to your father and then you can make a plan of escape...

2006-06-22 23:21:20 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Your mom should not have any contacts with your dad. You should go stay with your dad.

2006-06-22 23:21:56 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Just stand up because if you sit back its only going to get worser and if he touches you get him arrested.your mom might be better without him. DONT SIT OUT AND LET IT GET WORSER.

2006-06-22 23:42:23 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

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