why are people so concerned with what others think of them?

Question

this topic has never made sense to me. it really doesnt matter what others think of you, because they are the ones that have to deal with the emotions of liking you or not. part of what adds to this problem is that people are so quick to judge a person with out even knowing as much as ones name. this really irritates me, because they are entering an unknown area with way too much confidence. they really have no idea what they are getting into, but always have to act like they do. i ask this question because often times people dont think about it untill it is asked.

Answer 1

I think it was Dr. Phil that said "You'd stop worrying what people think about you if you knew how rarely they did." I don't know why we all grow up worrying about what other people think. As we grow, if we're lucky, we come to the realization that we just have to be who we are and people can either like it or not. What other people think of us is not a reflection of who we really are. It's a reflection of who they are. (Translation: it's their own insecurities that cause them to judge us.)

Answer 2

Humans are very social animals because the race grew up having to cooperate very closely to catch big game, ward off predators, and other cooperative activities. Thus what opinions others had of you were important.

People are also generalizing animals. This is so that we don't have to figure out what everything is everytime we see it. We create a "class" or "category" into which to fit new things: "That animal is a predator, avoid it." "That plant is edible so others like it probably are too."

Where the problem comes in is when we begin to categorize other people based on faulty or inadequate evidence. Just because someone is black does not necessarily mean that they can run really fast and play great basketball.

Answer 3

I ponder this all the time--- It has been really hard for me. When I was a senior in highschool, I said "to hell with all of you," and stopped caring what others thought of me.
But lately its been hard. I had done somethings I'm not too proud of and have been changing, but constantly think about what others may think.
I believe its socity...socity wants you to have prejudgement on others, I think it is enevitable, unless one makes a concious change every day. As in, make it a point to put preconceptions of others behind you.

Answer 4

I does matter what others think of you sometimes. If you want to date them, get hired by them, just need their approval just to feel human, sexy, smart, etc, things like that.

Its amazing how you don't get those things after you get labeled bipolar. I've thought a lot about this and wish I didn't care what people thought about me but I do.

Answer 5

I dwell and worry all the time what others think. I know I shouldn't let what other people say affect me and my feelings, perhaps an insecurity from my childhood. Being tore down and abused...

Answer 6

I think it's our western culture - materialism, beauty is this and not that, stuff like that. It's a waste of valuable energy. Full potential breaks all adversity and comes from within!

Answer 7

It's cuz of these super models in the magazine and on tv they all look the same so every one else thinks they should look like that to.

Answer 8

I used to worry about what others thought of me and then realized that they weren't thinking of me but themselves. I relaxed after that and now don't much care what others think of me. Very liberating.

Answer 9

I don't really care what people think, if someone calls me a name like dumb it doesent bother me. something i think about sometimes is why some people are poplular and others are not. its kind of weird.

Answer 10

They just want to look good but those people shouldn't think about what other people think about them as long as they are happy with themselves who cares what other people think!!