If society wants me to be married when I have children why is it that I can only get government assitance or a childcare tax credit if I am single? If 2 out of 3 marriages end in divorce anyways and most people come from broken families- why is this such an issue?
2006-06-22 14:38:31 · 26 answers · asked by anji d 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
No its not immoral.
2006-06-22 15:11:41 · answer #1 · answered by evie_cooper 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Morality is not an absolute; different people consider different things to be moral, just as different people consider different things to be ethical, or attractive, or appropriate.
Only you can make the decision about what you consider moral -- however, if you love and trust your family and friends, and want to fit in with them, it is likely that your upbringing and their past and current opinions about what is moral will impact your own decision.
Finally: moralily is something that, despite what some may claim, is always in flux. As we learn and grow, we learn new information that impacts our satisfaction with decisions we've made in the past. Perhaps you were religious, and learned things about the church that made you reject religion -- now those aspects of your religion that guided your morality are less impactful. Or perhaps you had no religion, and discovered things about the church that made you embrace religion -- now those aspects of your religion will begin to have an impact on your morality.
All of this is appropriate, and expected -- and ultimately, the choice is up to you.
Side note: government assistance is designed for people who, for whatever reason, already have children out of wedlock. Raising children is extremely difficult and expensive, and not to be taken lightly -- and every dollar you take out of the system for the wrong reasons is a dollar that won't go to someone who needs it. Consequently, if you have a child out of wedlock for the sole purpose and specific intention of collecting government assistance...well, it isn't illegal, but I personally wouldn't consider it ethical -- and since we're talking about the life of another human being, I personally wouldn't call it moral, either.
Oh, and quickly:
"most people come from broken families" -- not necessarily. I personally know a lot more people whose parents are still together than whose parents are not. It depends on a lot of factors, and may be true in smaller populations, but (I hope!) not across the board. If someone can cite a source that says otherwise, I'd be interested.
"2 out of 3 marriages end in divorce" -- might be true, and certainly would back up your claim about broken families...except that not all couples have children before they get divorced. At least, one would hope not, and many get divorced after their children are grown as well.
2006-06-22 15:17:30 · answer #2 · answered by daveowenville 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, sex out of wedlock is immoral. And because pregnancy is a huge sign that advertises your sin some people act like idiots and assume things about you. Been there. I was a junior in college when I found out I was pregnant, it was so hard because so many people (many who have also struggled with sexual sin themselves) had such a stromg opinion about me. It seems like society would rather a woman hide her sin than acceot the blessing and responsability. That's society, not God. Now I am married to the man of my dreams and God gave me a second chance. I am very happy. Don't worry. God still loves you.
2006-06-22 15:07:51 · answer #3 · answered by danielle_la_flor 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think it is immoral because things happen and if you are in love or just happened to get pregnant due to a sexual encounter that both of you wanted to partake in, i would say there is nothing wrong with it. It is not immoral, it is your choice, it can be a predicament though if you aren't married due to the fact there will be parental, financial and other issue if you both are not on board or plan ahead to have the child and it just happens unexpectantly.
2006-06-22 15:14:56 · answer #4 · answered by melissa_anne_maison 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Because those in dire need deserve it. Once you get your finances under control, you wouldn't even consider going back to the welfare trap that keeps sucking you in. Do you want to be another statistic, or be the one to make the break and have a better life. You know welfare is a great thing, but should only be considered a stepping stone to a better life.
Society like the Good Lord wants to keep you doing the right thing. Do the right things for your children. If you need help because of your kids, don't be ashamed. But also, don't take advantage of the system, it will take advantage of you. Its like drugs, once your on it, you're stuck.
2006-06-22 14:46:04 · answer #5 · answered by WRangler 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
By most religious standards - yes
By Society's standards - may be
By most cultural standards - depends ( not in North America, it's a way of life)
By Government Standards - Yes ( politics you see..they try to promote a family union, the hubby, the wife, the marriage, the kids, the bloody dog)
By Personal standards - depends on the person..
Dammit I am so confused now...ehehehe
2006-06-22 14:52:24 · answer #6 · answered by JimmyJaan 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Always do things the right way.
Getting pregnant without being married is NOT right. Says who? Says our inner self. Why be single and have children just to get tax credit? That is in itself a wrong motive for doing it. Doing the right thing is always harder than doing the wrong thing. Children should have fathers because that is good for them. It's good for they self-esteem and confidence. What you are doing is giving them a bad example. You are depriving them of a father figure. You are cutting off your toes to prevent them from gettting frost-bite......ie putting the cart before the bull.
2006-06-22 14:52:44 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, immoral. Along with the sex that initiated it. And you'll find it even more distressing when he decides to move on and you have no way to make him hold responsibility for the children.
Marriage really is a good thing.
2006-06-22 14:48:47 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Is not that is immoral. It is just the best for the child. That is you get the right person. Which no body is perfect but you can go for the very best out there. Take care.
2006-06-22 14:41:52 · answer #9 · answered by Twilight 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Pregnancy out of wedlock being considered immoral is a religious thing not a goverment thing. I personally do not consider pregnancy out of wedlock immoral. But there are people out there that do. It has more to do with their religious upbringing than anything.
2006-06-22 14:41:29 · answer #10 · answered by butterflykisses427 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Because our democracy is a fine example of hypocrisy. It's not fair. The point is, you should be married or financially stable by the time that you decide to have children, so that you don't need government assistance.
2006-06-22 14:42:40 · answer #11 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋