Is anyone out there married to a bipolar individual? And how is it for you?

Question

My spouse of 8 years has a bi polar disorder. Maybe it is just me or I am getting tired of being the one on the down list... I get put down, yelled at, and it gets worse. I have been punched a few times and that has stopped but the verbal garbage that comes out of his mouth hurts. I know the thing to do is leave him, but on the otherhand I love my house, I don't want to start over again. On the otherside of my brain I want to get the hell out of here and never come back. I don't know why I cannot leave. I find myself getting more and more depressed. I hear him yelling at me in my sleep, I hear him when he isn't there. What should I do, I do get counseling but I can't seem to take that "giant" step off the porch. I think I love him but he is unable to show the love back. Part of the disorder, any thoughts??? Or is this not making sense?

I should add he is on Medications, I don' think they work, depokote is a A##h### med. because it makes it worse.
I have children and they are a daily reminder that things are not as they should I told my girls that this is wrong and I hope this opens their eyes to the future, my son once in a while acts like him and I correct that fast. He just thinks it normal for a male to treat a female that way. Being only 8 I think I can get through to him. I gave him a pettition for a restraining order 2 years ago and it woke him up for about 2 weeks. So.....I feel like I am whining hear...but thanks for all the listeners!

Answer 1

Sweetheart, you have to ask yourself which is more valuable, your house, or your sanity. Once a punching bag, always a punching bag, and I don't mean that in the physical sense. If I had to choose between physical abuse and emotional abuse, I would choose physical, hands down (no pun intended). The body heals fairly quickly, the mind sometimes never heals. When you are hearing abuse in your sleep and during your alone time, I think it's safe to say there has been some heavy damage inflicted. Only you know when its over, no one else can make that decision for you. I hope you don't have children in the middle of this. If you do, here is one thing to ponder; your children are learning how women are to be treated, up close and personal. What would you tell your daughter if she were in this situation? Bottom line, you need to work on your sense of self worth. You sound like a lovely woman, I wish you luck, you deserve it!
Laura

Answer 2

i am bipolar, and i will tell you that it takes a strong person to deal with a loved one having it, i see my husband go through just as much as me, i wont say either of us suffer less than the other from my problems. if you can be strong i would say wait it out, but this is up to you, if you stick with it, it is likely to get better as you both understand more about his problems, and he works on it, meds are not always gold, in fact 4 me, meds have been the cause for the 2 times i should have been hospitalized, a rule with head meds is that if they dont make you better, they will probably make you worse, abilify was the most effective med i have used but i had an alergic reaction to it, so the doc stoped giving it...good luck...it will be a long road...

Answer 3

ok princess!! None of that's your fault so do no longer even think of that way! You have been married decrease than fake pretenses and you have each and every suited to diminish back out of this 'farce' without reprecussions. report for a divorce and opposite the expenses to him. Get a shifting truck and %. up the residing house and get the heck out. putting it in storage and/at your friends or mom and dad house is greater then leaving any of it there together with his 'loopy' self! you have my blessing and that i'm particular that of hundreds of persons. good success little sister. you'll be basically nice.

Answer 4

Most of that is an excuse, my husband is bipolar. He needs to go to anger management class and my husband says he needs to take his medication. I agree with you that change is hard, but sometimes bad out wieghs the good. Check the scales..is it love that is keeping you there, or the fear of change? My husband whom is bipolar says that the disorder can be fought if the individual strongly wants to.

Answer 5

If he is hittong you you can file a Domestic Violence Oder on him and they will remove him from the home. He will not be able to contact you or get within 500 ft of you or your family. May sound drastic but maybe that will wake him up a bit. You don`t need that abuse!!

Answer 6

I know someone in a relationship with someone who was dealing with bipolar disorder. After medication was prescribed, everything went back to normal. Make sure that he is talking to his physician and taking his medicine, and if he doesn't have a prescription, get him one.

Answer 7

my boyfriends ex wife was like that. i know its a disorder but i have trouble beliving everything they do wrong is because of bipolar. if you would be a happier person without him, id say go for it. my boyfriend put up with way to much. humans can only take so much.

Answer 8

girl **** him you, i know you love him, but in you need to take care of YOU and make sure you are happy. **** that bipolar **** he needs to take his medicine or do what he needs to do and leave you the **** alone. he ain't got no business putting his hands on you now that **** ain't right. sweetheart i have been through it so i understand my ex was on medication for being a schizo so he used that as a excuse to use me as a punching bag , but i left i got tired. please do what's best for you and take care of yourself. goodluck sweetheart and be careful!

Answer 9

Frighteningly familiar. I thought it was her meditarenean temper, gets realy bad right before her period.

Answer 10

if you love him and you love you get counceling - and make sure he's taking his meds.