I mean... porn stars are people too right.. REAL PEOPLE... if he/she wants to get off on thier body instead of yours... isnt that cheating especially if they know you don't approve? If you get to where you are no longer attracted to your spouse physically...then shouldnt you get divorced and move on rather than turning into a porn perv?
2006-06-22 10:53:03 · 20 answers · asked by Brandy A 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
It may not be cheating in the technical sense, but it is definitely not what you want in a healthy relationship. And don't buy all that crap about guys being hard-wired for porn. That's just a lot of BS to make people feel okay about something that doesn't jibe with most commonly held morals.
You should talk to your husband about it and let him know how much you dislike the behavior. If he really loves you, he will be willing to change. And I don't think that you have to accept his watching porn, or join in with him. Porn is degrading to everyone. Sex is a very personal, very intimate and very special part of marriage. A couple can become much stronger together through a healthy sex life. But it doesn't include porn. Voyeuristic activities are not part of a committed, caring relationship.
If you find you cannot live with him, or that he is absolutely unwilling to change, then I would say divorce is valid step. But don't give up until you try to work it out.
2006-06-22 11:45:09 · answer #1 · answered by anthporter 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Take it easy. You may want to sit down before you read this, but ALL guys look at porn. Sorry. It's hard wired within us. You try sitting on the amount of testosterone the average man has and see if you aren't launched into space. Porn offers a release. Pure and simple. Your man is not cheating on you, and most likely has no intention of doing so.
Relax, and have a little more self esteem. Your man is still attracted to you. But he also looks at porn. Maybe you should enjoy some with him? If not, tell him to be discreet about it. Then, try and trust him some more. If you think he's cheating on you for real, with an actual human being, then refer to the fifty thousand and one questions posted in this forum by women/girls who think their mate is cheating on them. Good Luck!
2006-06-22 11:07:14 · answer #2 · answered by Mr. Grudge 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
To a degree and depending on the circumstances. For instance let's say Pamela Lee strikes his fancy, just using an example. Well it's important to understand that looking and touching are very different. Don't you like someone? Maybe not a porn star but a celebrity? Well try talking to your partner are giving them an example of empathy. Explain why you have a problem with it and ask them if they would have a problem if the shoe was on the other foot.
2006-06-22 11:16:38 · answer #3 · answered by ~Mother Of Angels~ 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Research and studies has shown that porn for men isn't really about the women or the sex. It is more of an emotional detachment from life for a short time. Kinda like having a couple beers, or watching a sports game, or working. You should not take it personally.
Do your research before jumping to conclusions. The internet is the greatest research tool available.
2006-06-22 12:02:01 · answer #4 · answered by dean_moriarty00 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No I do not think it is cheating - just away to release. He doesn't want someone else. He is just filling a need. So either loosen up and watch it together so you don't feel left out and you two can have fun as a couple, or keep him occupied, or just tell him to be discreet. Please don't think he is replacing you with the person he is watching though - guys just are not wired that way. Now if he is actually physically cheating on you - kick the bum out!
2006-06-22 11:16:43 · answer #5 · answered by ur_ave_joe 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What about if a person masturbates and dreams of somebody other than their spouse? That is no different than getting off while watching porn. I don't think it is cheating, but if your spouse doesn't like it or is hurt by it, then you shouldn't do it.
2006-06-22 10:58:55 · answer #6 · answered by Andrew T 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
While fantasies ( looking and thinking about porn stars ) isn't really cheating a partner should respect the fact looking at and watching porn bothers the other partner and stop. afterall you live with the partner
2006-06-22 11:05:59 · answer #7 · answered by uniroyalfan 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A porn perv? jUST BECAUSE SOMEBODY WATCHES PORN IT DOESNT MEAN THEY ARE A PERV. iN FACT i KNOW MANY FEMALES THAT LOVE PORN. yOU ARE TAKING IT PERSONAL. I doubt very much that hes getting off on her body. Its seeing the sex and how good at it the actor/actresses are at doing it. You should try watching it with him. Ask yourself what are you afraid of. If you leave him good luck finding somebody who doesnt like porn, in fact you might as well look for someone who doesnt like sex at all then
2006-06-22 11:03:39 · answer #8 · answered by tranquilized_inaz 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes i think that its cheating it says in the bible that if a man looks at another woman in that way that its considered cheatiing i dont know it word from word but i know that is what it pretty much says besides i dont see how anyone could stay with someone that would rather look at a piece of trash rather then the woman he married!it sounds like you deserve better then that and see how happy he would be left with his dirty little videos ! sorry if i offend you i just feel very strongly about the topic
2006-06-22 11:33:34 · answer #9 · answered by sar sar 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Porn is normal for guys.I dont see it as cheating nor do I think that he isnt attracted to you.Maybe you should talk to him and let him know how you feel.You need to compromise.Maybe he can cut down.Maybe one night he can just be with you...no tv...and you make it hot!Tell him there are always toys, etc to spice up your life.
2006-06-22 11:03:46 · answer #10 · answered by missyandgordon 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋