Yesterday I was chatting to a girl online and she was telling me she is really strict and believes in love and marriage.. I think that's fair enough... but then she said she would never divorce no matter what's going to happen in the future, so I asked her what would she do if her husband becomes violent and beats her up everyday? She replied that she would support him anyway and with the help of God they will find a way out of this because she is so against divorce. I think she is mad, I know some people have got some strong beliefs but is it fair to put yourself in danger for it? What do you think?
2006-06-22 09:56:56 · 28 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Other - Society & Culture
I think that even the Bible gave some reasons for divorce (adultery). I also think that someone who does not believe in divorce does not also need to stay in a home where abuse is happening. A person needs to draw healthy boundaries and sometimes that means moving out (separation) until the spouse starts making good choices. There are other options besides divorce or putting yourself in danger. If my husband started using drugs, I might not run out and file divorce but I sure as heck am not going to let him have access to our kids, bank accounts, etc. He would have to walk through a series of steps in order to regain trust. I think it is possible to reconcile any issue in marriage with enough heart change but you don't have to live in the same house during that time.
2006-06-22 10:07:33 · answer #1 · answered by Sylvia M 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like she is very strong in her beliefs. The only thing that anyone can do is be there for her. In time maybe things would get so bad she would change her mind. That is when she would need a friend to talk to.People should never abandon other people because there beliefs are different. What would you think if she did stay with him and eventually through prayer her husband did change. God works in mysterious ways my friend.
To answer your question ..Is it right or wrong....i don't know. I can not judge another. Do I think it's healthy...No I do not. That is just my opinion.
2006-06-22 10:08:29 · answer #2 · answered by Elizabeth P 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know where she is coming from I have been there twice. There is some things that no one will ever see from an abuser unless they are around all the time. Most people that do abuse people whether it be physical or mental have a root to the problem in their past and don't know how to stop or where to start working on their problem. The most ironic thing for me was he knew that he had done it the second everything stopped in that moment, yet he still had no idea why he couldn't control himself during the events. Don't get me wrong here though, I think that staying unless the other party is working (not on their own but professionally) on fixing their problem, you should not stay in a abusive relationship - RUN and NEVER look back!!!! I am still dealing wit one of my own.
2006-06-22 10:08:25 · answer #3 · answered by SugarKisses22 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I agree with her to some point I think marriage is very sacred, you should only get married if your gonna stick to it, but if it gets to a point where your life is in danger and no matter how much help you've seeked out or guidance you've tried to follow you are still being abused of, treathened with your life, well I think that alone has divorced you, cause you swear to obey, love, and protect that person, but if that person is not keeping with those promises that where made to GOD himself, then the marriage is over, and should be annuled, cause the Catholic church doesn't divorse. They annule the marriage, but with any other church then yes divorse is the answer.
2006-06-22 10:02:52 · answer #4 · answered by raider_way 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Divorce is never good but there are some time some things worse than Divorce a wife beater, a Child molester, I will say what God Joins no man can take apart. But to often Couples of to day give no Authority to God
2006-06-22 10:01:43 · answer #5 · answered by kritikos43 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wrong as 2 left feet! I think your chat friend must be very young or very naive or both. It is commendable to love unconditionally. It is foolish to put yourself in mortal danger because you made a commitment. A spouse breaks the wedding vow by being abusive. I don't see why any healthy thinking individual would accept spousal abuse. God did not make people to be punching bags. He made us to glorify Him. You can not control what your spouse does....only what you yourself do as an individual.
2006-06-22 10:13:02 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some religious sects teach that the husband is always right and the wife should never question his authority. I am so grateful that my parents didn't raise me in one of those. Hopefully, she will get out into the world and realize that a woman is just as important as the man and marriage is built on mutual respect.
2006-06-22 10:04:08 · answer #7 · answered by karen wonderful 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wonder if she would stay that if, if, they had kids and he was starting to molest them. Would she stay with him still?
Because it said nothing in the Bible about being completely stupid! Even God, himself, would shake some sense into her little brain!
I also wonder what she would think if said man beat her into a coma in the hospital? Would she leave him then?
I feel sad for her, her kids, and anybody who loves her to except the fact that she would go through ANYTHING not to get a divorce!
2006-06-22 10:04:49 · answer #8 · answered by uchaboo 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm against divorce too, but there comes a time in some instances that you have to protect yourself, and children. Move out, go to a crisis center, get help.
2006-06-22 10:06:06 · answer #9 · answered by mad_cow717 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As a Catholic,i dont believe in divorce generally,but if the situation became so unbearable or i was in danger then i would consider it as a survival tactic
2006-06-22 10:04:17 · answer #10 · answered by Sherry Baby ( Ethan's Mama ) 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋