parental problems...?

Question

My daughter is 13 years old and she wants to go to the mall by herself or wth a frined, and im really skepticle about it, i tld her no a million times, but she wont stop bugging me, should i let her go? Or should i not? Please tell u why u choose either one.

Answer 1

All of the previous answers have valid points, which means that you have to take many things into consideration.
I have a 13 year old and I won't let her go to the mall by herself or with just friends. I will take her and her friend(s) to the mall and keep in touch with scheduled meeting times (every 1/2 hr) or cell phone calls. It might seem a little excessive, but anything can happen in 1 hour, which is a REALLY long time when you don't know where your child is!


Note: We live downtown in a big city, so travelling on buses AND trains to the malls is not very safe for young girls who are alone!

Answer 2

You are the parent. You make the rules. Period.
When she is 18 she can make her own rules. If you change your mind because of her bugging you, that will only teach her that she can walk all over you. Stick to your guns, but also make sure that she realizes the reason you have made this decision (i.e. its unsafe, someone could nab her and you wouldn't know, etc)
Also, try to come up with some sort of compromise, like you go to the mall with her and set up designated meeting times and locations (at the fountain on the hour every hour) to give her slight freedom. If she complies, you can give her longer periods of freedom... eventually leading to independence. If she doesn't keep to the meeting agreements (and you have to be strict about this) lessen the time increments she has by herself, or even the time at the mall. (Or if you really want to piss her off, go everywhere with her and hold her hand ;) )
It will take sacrifice on your part, but hey, that's what being a parent is all about.
Good luck

Answer 3

No not by herself! I totally agree with you telling her no! I think a good age is about 15. There are to many pedophiles out there today and to many people on the news dragging 12 and 13 yr old little girls in their cars in the parking lot. What my aunt does with my little cousin that is 13 is let me take her and her friends but i have to stay at the mall when they are there. I'm a mom of 2 young girls so I have the mother instinct and she trust me with her daughter and her daughter doesn't mind me going cuz I'm not mother and I'm her cool older cousin. So you could compromise and find an older family member to take her and her friends.

Answer 4

You should make a compromise. You could drop them off at the mall and let them shop for a couple of hours alone. Tell them you are also going to the mall because you have a few things you need to buy. Tell them what stores you will be in and set a meeting time. You could also set a time they need to check in (like every hour or hour and a half) After doing that a few times you should be comfortable enough dropping them off and picking them up.
And after reading what the girl above me wrote, I can see why you don't want your daughter to turn out like THAT. Make sure your daughter also can spell and use proper grammer.

Answer 5

When I was 13, I was allowed to go out with my friends without my parents. There were never times when my parents came alone whenever I am with my friends and I never got in trouble. I guess it only depends on if they are willing to listen and follow your rules. The most important thing is try to understand what type of a girl is she. Is she the type that always run off like wild and not care about herself. If yes, say NO. If she is a very good girl, then say YES. Tell her what she is allowed and allowed to do. Give her a time that she needs to come home everyday - a curfew. Tell her where she is allowed and not allowed to go or do. See her reaction and you will find out if she is responsible enough to have the freedom or not.

Answer 6

Too young and too many perverts out there. The answer is no, but you might suggest that she get a group of friends (at least 3 others) together for a trip to the mall. If they all stayed together, there would be no trouble.

Sit down with her and tell her your concerns and your group trip suggestion. You could then take the group to the mall, with instruction to stay together, and then let them head in and pick them up at a designated time.

It would give her a chance to go to the mall and be with her friends and be safe. Perverts don't bug groups. My 2 cents

Answer 7

Just depends on how big of a city you live in. I was 12 and went to malls in Kansas City with my friends all the time with no supervision. If she's had a history of not being responsible in the past then don't let her go, but if you don't think she'll do anything crazy while she's there then let her go...it won't hurt her.

Answer 8

Let her go! When I was 13 my mom would take my friends and I to the mall and let us chill alone, but she would also be there but doing her own thing, we always had a certain place and time to meet her. It was a win win situation, she didn't follow us around, but she was still close by! It is okay to let her go with a big group of friends as long as she checks in with you and is back within a decent time. Give her a chance to prove to you that she can be trusted and responsible!

Answer 9

I live in a small town and I am 13. Tomorrow I am having a birthday party, shopping. My mom and her friends are going to sit in a cafe while we go all over the mall. We have to check in ever hour.

Try letting her have her freedom slowly

Answer 10

Your daughter should b able 2 go 2 the mall by herself with a friend. She SHOULD go because she is old enough, and she is a teenager! ?Y wouldnt u let her go? If u dont let her go she cant hang out wit her friends, b without u, & just b a typical teenager. My mom let !me! go 2 the mall with my friend(s) by myself when I was 12. !Let that girl go 2 mall with out u!She dont need nobody 2 look afta her she is a damn teenager,now so STOP tryin 2 hold on. Holla back!!! Ya girl, Miss *Princess* $Diva$ !Jade!