im confused about love?

Question

so i have been dating my current boyfriend for almost 11 months. during the first about six months i was truly in love with him but lately things havent been that great. hes pretty protective and i think that his feelings for me are a lot stronger then mine are for him. to add to that, i just got back from a camp i had been at for a week. i met a guy there who i talked to the whole time and we would sit and have these deep talks that i can never have with my boyfriend. but i dont know what to do because my boyfriend said if he ever lost me he would kill himself and i still care about him a lot and a part of me still loves him but i like this other guy and im just confused about what i should do.

i have been thinking about our relationship before camp even came around. he lives 44 minutes away and i was thinking that when he got his car we would see each other more and this whole thing would blow over and i wouldnt be uncertain anymore but things havent changed. we still dont see each other and i keep having to convince myself i love him.

im almost 16 for all who were asking, my boyfriend is almost 18

Answer 1

Answering these questions is difficult because there is always more to it, such as how old are you, how many true loves have you had, things like that. I was 18 and had the most wonderful boyfriend. We did love eachother, however, as time went along, I realized that his love for me was a lot more than mine for him. It was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do, but I knew in my heart that if love isn't pretty much equal, it's not fair to the other partner - so I "let him go". I think of him alot, and I know he's doing well, so I'm happy for him. As for what your boyfriend said about losing you and killing himself - that is scary. However, coming from another relationship with a very controling man, they love to say things like that to keep us in our place. You cannot be responsible for his actions, keep telling yourself that. Ultimately we're all responsible for what we do and say - no matter how we try to place the blame on someone else for our actions. Best of luck! :)

Answer 2

Like everyone else has said, you're 13; that's a bit young to be "in love." You said that the more you're around Kohl, the more you like him—that's nowhere close to loving him. Also, getting you to try drugs is not a positive thing. In the short term, drugs can affect your schoolwork and personal life; in the long run, they can lead you into other, more potent substances, which are addicting and potentially fatal. Doing drugs is not a good way to go, and someone who convinces you to try them even less. Besides, you already have a boyfriend. Don't be disloyal to him; if you decide that this Kohl fellow is "absolutely for you," break up with your boyfriend first. Don't go gallivanting around behind his back. Finally, though you probably don't want to hear it, you are indeed very young. Instead of worrying about which boy is "your love," you should be focusing on school. Are you planning to go to college? Your education and career is much more long-term and important than any boys you might be infatuated with when you're 13.

Answer 3

I had the same problem in high school. Even my parents and sisters loved him, but I would go out with friends and come home, he'd be at the door wondering what we did, who we saw etc... It was a real turn off, and I really did love him at one time.

He won't kill himself, if he does then he's not much of a man. Anyone who kills over another person has major problems and you don't need to be thinking about that stuff.

Let him down gently and it will hurt for awhile but just tell him your not ready to be tied down. You'll both move on to better things, and if you are meant to be you'll find each other later in life.

Just be nice about it, leave as friends if possible.

Answer 4

Funny you should say six months, when we meet new people there is a chemical produced in the brain that lasts that long, can't remember the name of it, but it runs out in 6 months then it's up to us to want the relationship or understand it was a fling and its over. Don't let him use the kill myself routine, he's immature to use that line. If you were sexually active, that's just him missing the sex. Move on because you are definitley not ready to settle down. Good luck, no one did anything wrong, it's just nature.

Answer 5

First off, how old r u? Second, Are you sure you are not infatuated? He's PRETTY PROTECTIVE? If that's not a SIGN, I don't know what is. You may what to consider counseling for you. That way you will be able to be more secure within yourself. Making a good strong decision, is hard but if you CARE at all about you or him you must talk to someone first. Once you have discovered whom you really are then and only then can you make anyone in your life happy. Remember, you really can't make anyone happy in this world. You must make yourself happy then find someone to share in that happiness. God bless and always be true to yourself.

Answer 6

Number one, if you have to convince yourself that you love somebody, it isn't love at all. You feel like you feel and you have a right to. Don't let his threat of suicide keep you in a relationship that you aren't sure of. People will often times try to guilt you into staying with them, but they can't guilt you into loving them. You have a right to experience true love in your life even if it's not with him. Think about what's good for you and what's best for you and make your decision from that. Then, call someone and tell them that he is threatening suicide if you leave him, before you leave or tell him you're leaving, so that there can be help and support for him when you break the news to him.
Be Careful, if you feel it isn't safe for you to tell him alone, take someone along with you.
Good Luck!
Clarissa

Answer 7

He is only saying that he will kill himself because he knows you can find someone better than him. He is just trying to scare you and make you feel guility. Being with your boyfriend is only going to make you feel tied down. And the longer you stay with your boyfriend, the deeper mess you will be in. It's better you break up with him. Even if you don't want to be with the camp guy, I think breaking up with your boyfriend will improve your emotional state. Just try to be respectful and receptive when you breakup.

Answer 8

no one can tell you what to do with your life but yourself.you need to sit down and really think of what you want out of your relationship and if you want to keep it with your current boyfriend you need to sit down and talk with him and tell him your feelings,and don't do it in a negative fashion, actually talk, no yelling.also let him know how uncomfortable you are when he says he would kill himself if he ever lost you,but if you don't want to be with him explain why you don't and that if he still has the urge to kill himself he needs to go talk with a professional.suicide is not the answer to losing a relationship with someone, there may be more underlying problems he needs to face than just losing you.

Answer 9

As hard as it is u gotta leave ur current boyfriend. I have been with mine for over 5 years and he has always been very protective its not a good thing and he well never change neither well urs, trust me ive tryd everything. And dont worry about the whole killing himself thing they all say that. Every sinlge one of them. Dont wait the longer it takes the harder it is trust me.

Answer 10

You have to be honest with your bf if it hurts him or not. If you don't like him, then you don't love him. Just don't be with a person b/c you are scared of what that person might do. It sounds like if he wants to kill himself, then he needs some counseling. Just make your life better by letting him go if you do not love him. Life is too short to not live it happy. Good Luck!!!