pregnant-to confirm the father?

Question

Hi there,
I hope Im not disturbing but I have a burning question and you might think Im not a serious lady.
Its about pregnancy.
I had sex with my boyfriend on my 9-10th day of my menstrual cycle and then again on my 21st,22nd,and 23rd days of the same cycle then I have another male friend and we happened to have sex on my 25th day of my cycle.I thought all this time through I was safe.I dont use any contraceptives only depend on safe days.My menses came last on 13th-15th May,I expected them on 12th June but have missed.I did a pregnancy test and its positive.
We would like to have a baby and My boyfriend really dreams of a daughter.My question is:WHO DO THINK IS THE FATHER OF THE BABY IN ME?????I JUST WANT TO KNOW SO THAT I DECIDE WHAT TO DO.IF I CAN TELL MY BOYFRIEND ABOUT IT,OR ELSE I CARRY FOR 9 MONTHS AND AT THE END I FIND OUT THE BABY LOOKS LIKE THE OTHER MAN WHICH WILL BE A DISASTER.
PLEASE HELP AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.I DONT WANT TO BE DAMPED BY MY BOYFRIEND.
THANKS IN ADVANCE
BETTY

Answer 1

have an amniocentisis done and dna testing

Answer 2

You really messed up but then I guess you know that. The only way to know for sure who the daddy is, is to have a DNA test. That can only be done on the baby, or the amniotic fluid via an amniocentesus which is usually done after 16 weeks of pregnancy. The amnio carries with it some risk so I'm guessing most docs won't do it unless there's another valid reason worth the risk.

So it is likely you won't know for sure until after the baby is born and you can have the baby tested in a safe manner.

Quite honestly, if you put yourself in this situation, you don't sound mature enough to be a parent yet. You can't be too serious with your man if you're cheating on him. I'd say the odds that the two of you will be together for the next 19 years or so to raise that baby are slim.

Single parenthood is very hard. I have done it with 3. My girls were babies when I got divorced and I had a son a few years later. I was probably in better shape than you financially. I have a college degree and was able to collect child support from 2 dads that make six-figure incomes, and still it was a struggle.

It is very tough to work all day and find time to effectively and lovingly parent a child. YES it can be done, but I can also tell you that for 10 years I had virtually no social life either. Men don't jump for joy to date women who have other men's kids. Plus since I had to work to support my kids, I always had to choose - do I date and not give my kids time they need or not date?

It did get easier when the dad's stepped up and took their visitation, but there were a few years in the beginning when my girls' dad did neither. If I hadn't had great parents, we'd have ended up in poverty.

So....perhaps you should reconsider whether or not this is really the time for you to be having a baby. You can always consider adoption which is a very, very loving thing to do for a baby you love but cannot properly care for. These days birth moms can stay in the baby's life too so you can still have a relationship and eventually explain that you gave them up because you loved them so much, not because you didn't. It's sort of the best of both worlds because your baby gets a loving, stable family and you know you've done the best you can.

Good luck with a very tough situation.

Answer 3

Looking into your cycle and judging by the numbers you gave the baby should be for your boyfriend. If you have a 30 day cycle, normally you ovulate around the 13-15th day of the cycle and that would put you into the dates you were with the boyfriend. You may have lucked out with that one. I would definately start collecting info from both guys about medical conditions and make a list. This can be helpful later on when the doctors can check on the baby through amnio. good luck.

Answer 4

Never mind what we think, go ad consult a doctor. i know for sure that it is posible to detremine ones parentage throught DNA tests but i'm not sure if it can be done on unborn fotuses. so find out from ur doc.

by the way what would yo do if u find out that the baby is from the other man?
a friendly advice try staying loyal to your partnr instead of sleaping around. it would give u a better relationship. but if u choose to make ur own decisins fine but atleast learn one thing fromur mitake... there's nothing called a safe period. a single sperm can stay alive for upto 5days in a women's body! and that is quiet enough time to make u pregnant. so from now on do use protection.

Answer 5

DO NOT wait until after the baby is born! Do it now these guys deserve to know the truth. I know its gonna be hard on you because you really love the guy but you started this risk when you opened your legs to another guy ...oh and there is no such thing as safe days......I hope you do not have a disease that you are gonna pass to your baby......you need to think about these things BEFORE you do them

Answer 6

Once you get your due date, which goes by the first day of your last menstrual cycle, and then go to an online pregnancy calculator, it will give you a date of conception, and you can decide that way.

Answer 7

You can have an amnio but there are risks that you would need to discuss with your dr. I believe there is a chance with amnio that you can loose the baby. I'd say that you need to be honest with both men because to test for paternity you're going to need their dna anyway.

Answer 8

Call the maury show after the baby is born to have a paternity test done.

Answer 9

I am 98% sure it is YOUR BOYFRIENDS...by the 25th day you were already pregnant....you ovulate on your 10-14th day...and sperm stays alive for about 3 days so there you go...sex on the 9th and 10th you had live sperm in you when you ovulated.

Answer 10

i would say you have no choice but to tell him you dont really love him anyways or you wouldnt have cheated on him
so just tell him theres no way to no unless you do a dna and that takes him to do

Answer 11

go have a paternity test done. and tell your BOYFRIEND the truth. get married to whoever the father is...good luck