why do we have to define our sexuality?

Question

We are all people at the end of the day, whether we sleep with men or women. That is what sexuality is about - a sex choice... When a lifestyle choice is made, i.e only hanging around people of the same sexuality, etc, segregation begins. I'm a great believer that everyone has a right to their own beliefs and opinions and it takes all sorts in this world. There are always people who are going to judge, that unfortunately will never change, but i do believe that sexuality can sometimes over ride a persons personality. It is forgotten that it is a very small part of who we are as people.

I don't personally feel the need to partake in gay pride, due to the fact that i feel that my private life, whether with a man or woman is my business. I see that in a sense, gay pride is simply segregating society further; almost giving the impression that there has to be a divide. Gay men and women are generally accepted into society now and i feel that the more emphasis there is on 'being different', the longer the divide will last.

I see gay pride in the same light as Religious figures expressing their views in town centres. Everyone has a right to their own beliefs and lifestyle, but there is not always a need to thrust it in people faces.

Answer 1

Because we want to attract the kind of people that we want to attract (does that make sense)
also i think because we need affirmations among gays and lesbians, we need to hear that its ok for us to be the way we are.... i'm saying this, not in a negative note co please do not get cross.
its just that we get soooo much $hit from straights that we need a place to go to (an outlet) talk about our feelings without being judged..... you know how we instantly feel more connected to a fellow gay person in the midst of straights? i do believe, this is the reason for gay pride to be such a big hit....lol
.....we just want a sense of belonging, a "family" to go back to,at the end of the day....

i hope this answer doesnt sound too "mindless" to you....
hope this helps! good luck

Answer 2

>>>We are all people at the end of the day, whether we sleep with men or women<<<

True enough, but this makes me wonder then, why so may gay people place their homosexuality at the very core and center of their identity -- to the point where it's very often thrown in society's faces.

Take, for instance, all this stuff about "gay pride." Why don't we ever see any "straight pride" parades and T-shirts?

Answer: because straight people are much more able to keep their sexuality private, and feel no need to flaunt it or place so much of their self-identity on it.

We can't say the same about the average gay person these days.

Answer 3

It's a human condition to try and label and pidgeonhole everything in our environment.

It passes for greater understanding of everything in our ken. "Because I know that this is green, edible vegetable matter I shall call it a legume" And so, everything else branded as a legume will have the same qualities...

It is also the limitation of language. There are 8 billion people in the world and each one (probably) has a unique set of qualities the idea that they can be broken down into three (some would say only two - I've been answering questions on the Spanish site where the argument is bisexuals are repressed gays!) mutually exclusive sexual groupings is ludicrous. Not least because the lines are blurred due to individual variance along the Kinsey scale (for example).

Ultimately, I only use them as a best fit not as a concise definition.

Answer 4

You make a good point.
Some might define their sexuality because they feel the need to make it clear to everyone they're not gay,,just call them homo phobics.
Others may do it because they had to struggle for the right to be themselves. They feel expressing their sexual orientation is the last step in not having to hide.
I however agree with you that we shouldn't define it because that's also misleading.All gay men and lesbian women are different just as all the heterosexuals.
Sexual identity and activity should always be respected between consenting adults no matter what they do.
On that note,my support for the bdsm community who are still discriminated.
We gotta let love rule

Answer 5

Because society demands it. I have often thought I am so many different people my sexuality is such a small part of what I am about I am a nurse, a father, a brother, a son, a husband, a friend, a mason, a republican, a Christian, a bisexual, a disciplinarian, g0y, an adviser, and the list goes on and on. How many of those where related to my sexuality three possibly four. Society likes to lable people so that they can judge them. And we fall into that too. How many of you looked at my list of lables and thought something negative?

Answer 6

I agree with you that we all all humans at the end of the day, but I can understand the desire for definition. It all has to do with personal identifiers: for instance, I can look at myself as a woman, a wife, a daughter, a professional, a sister, a friend...and so on. I identify myself by things that are primary to my life. So if your sexuality is who makes you what you are, a person might feel the need to strongly identify them self as a gay, lesbian, transgendered, or bi person. I think as long as the person who is living their life is comfortable with their identify, it's perfectly normal to be identified this way.

It's another story when society feels the need to identify people, and attach stereotypes to those people. That is what creates hatred and contempt in this world, because that is where we go beyond being humans, and just become our labels.

Answer 7

I am gay and I think we have to define our sexuality to identify ourselves for others to know if they're into it or not. I identify myself "GAY" so that people who hates gay people will not come close to me, and those who loves me will feel safe around. Straight people identify themselves as they are so that people will know what they are into and what they aren't.

We call ourselves who we are. It's like a grocery store. The produce, wine, pastries, baby products and etc. are just like our sexual orientation. It leads people where they should go depending on what they prefer. Within the bunch of sections, there are different classifications like in "gay" there are top, bottom, versatile, etc..

It is simply to point out the road for you.

Answer 8

Because we still live in a super-over-zealous religious society that make us categorize our sexuality.

Answer 9

i dont know.. people are people.. it should be left at that..
what is sexuality anyway??
we should be entitled to like or love whoever we want whenever we want without being labled in any kind of way..

Answer 10

So the fearful can divide everyone and point fingers.